Unusual one

Shaunie

I self harm by overdosing - countless of times. And half the time this happens I get really sick. But when i dont want to harm myself even looking at pills makes me feel really sick. And now just drinking water makes me think a pill is going down me and start to feel physically sick. So i only drink when I feel really dehydrated and barely drink.
I get headaches and feel drained.
And I can't stay on medication to get better for this reason.
It's like when you first get drunk and can never drink that drink again because it's remind you of when you was ill.
I dont know how to change the way I think. Or to distract myself from it.

Former Member

Hay Shaunie,

I can relate to some of the things you mentioned and I guess it's you subconscious trying to protect you from doing it again. Overdosing isn't very nice and I know this from past experiences.

I have two suggestions for this:

1) Try flavoured water or other drinks that doesn't taste like water to help distract you.

2) Try repeating phrases before after and during. phrases like , "this will not hurt me", "this is just water" and " I'm going to be okay".

You could even try saying your own phrases, it's all about trying to rationalise, it's something that I do when anxiety builds up.



V

Shaunie

Thank you for this. I will definitely try more different drinks. But a lot of drink iv used when overdosing and still reminds me. Been eating a lot of ice cream cause it's not just liquid and should be hydrating. But not very healthy.
I will try telling myself it's safe to drink. And hopefully I'll get used to it.
Thank you

Shaunie

And i think not drinking enough is physically affecting me and have symptoms of uti and don't know if just that is something worth going doctors for

Lostsense

I had a UTI and was put on antibiotics

Lostsense

It's actually funny because I was in A&E after my biggest overdose and they had to take my pee to put in an overnight ward so that's how they found out I had a UTI and then I was sectioned not because of my UTI 😂 btw! Lol but because of how many tablets I took and it was because I wanted it to kill me and I was on a drip and all sorts too and because I was hearing things too so I was sectioned