Masturbation

One-in-a-million

Ok guys this may seem a bit awkward

my first question is why do I feel guilty about masturbation after I have finished? Its like I feel great for a while but then once its worn off I feel guilty about what I've just done.

My other question is can you really get too used to a certain type of masturbation making you unresponsive (unable to orgasm) during other sexual experiences including intercourse?
basically I'm not have haven't been in a sexual relationship before but I do use masturbation for pleasure. When I was younger I would dry hump a pillow and this has been what I do mostly I do try another form but it doesn't feel as good although I do get something from it
I don't exactly want to be unresponsive to other sexual experiences and I was just wondering what I should do to ensure this doesn't happen. I have been online and it has suggested perhaps trying sex toy but that would be really awkward if my mum, dad or brother took the parcel in and decided to open it.

I do apologise in advance if anyone feels awkward about this but I haven't really got anyone I can talk to about this, my friends would start messing around and being immature about it even though many of them do masturbate anyway

thanx guys

Former Member

Hi there one-in-a-million,

There is absolutely nothing wrong with your question or with masturbation in general - so no need to feel awkward at all about asking, especially as this is a safe place *hug*

To develop further on your first question, is there any particular reason you feel guilty after? What thoughts enter your mind that may make you feel this way? There has been some stigma in the past linking "shame" to masturbation, especially for women, however this is a perfectly natural way to discover your body and is not shameful in the slightest!

Have a look at our article on masturbation, where they mention this;

Masturbation is completely natural and healthy and normal and you won’t go blind, break into spots, or burn in eternal hellfire of damnation. You’ll just enjoy your body, feel more comfortable receiving pleasure with sex partners, and have a great time.

There is no reason why a certain type of masturbation may make you unresponsive - especially to other sexual experiences, as these can be so broad. However it's all about discovering what works for you. If you repeat the same process without any pleasure then it could be worth, as you mention, experimenting with other techniques. The sex toy may be an option (if possible make sure you can get privacy or no one is home!) but there are other options too (watching porn/fantasising, thinking of certain things that turn you on, trying different positions etc) that only you can really find out for yourself as everyone is different.
Also perhaps the more you embrace the freedom and acceptance of masturbation, the more responsive you may feel.

Have a look also at our article on Orgasms that way help :yes:

One-in-a-million

Thank you for replying is noce to be able to talk without feeling juged about what I and most people do.
Im not quite sure why I feel guilty about it after, I suppose it could be that like you say all the people who say women shouldnt masturabate. Although I mentioned sex toys is not something Im particuarly intreated in. One is the fact of living in a house with my parents and the embarecment it would cause if they found out. The other is the fact that Ive never had a sexual relationship so.........

Im really glad to hear that it shouldnt make me unresponcive to any other sexual experiances.

Despite my age (21) I feel people can get really immiture when talking about a sexual subject (my friends)

Thank you so much

Former Member

Masturbation can be a taboo and scary to talk about due to the stigma it has attached, as you said, so maybe that's why your friends are sometimes immature about it - they might masturbate as well but just feel the need to hide it - so its great that you can be open about it. It's actually useful to masturbate before even having a sexual relationship, almost encouraging really as it can improve your sex life eventually! So no worries that you haven't had one yet!

It's worth doing this when you are sure no one is home, simply because as you say it might be hard if they found out - not because it's wrong but because it's a private/intimate thing between yourself and yourself :yes:

We are always here so feel free to post openly *hug*