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A part-time relationship with someone who doesn't have time for a full one
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
There are many thousands of women who enjoy sex, but don't have time for all the relationship stuff like wining and dining/going out on dates, dancing, having long conversations, doing a long list of hobbies/pursuits with someone as though they're joined at the hip etc. The most common reasons for the lack of time would be that she works long hours and/or she devotes a high proportion of her time to looking after her family. These things are unlikely to significantly affect her sex drive. Hence she'd likely want someone with whom she has sex every time she sees him - there'd be little time for anything else. I'd like someone like this; where would I find her? I'd be like her regular booty call. She couldn't spare a couple of hours or so to go to an expensive restaurant even if she wants to - hence she won't expect to, nor will she ask me to take her there. I've never a part-time relationship requested/sought on a dating site, despite the fact that many of the women on there clearly have very busy lives and therefore don't have anywhere near enough time for a full-time relationship.
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Do you not think that there's a reason why we haven't confirmed everything you apparently know? Because you're wrong. Why don't you take a minute to erase what you think you know and actually listen to us?
Be constructive. What exactly is wrong with my post above? Where do I find busy horny girls who only have time for sex, not full-time relationships? Those who don't have hours in an evening to be wined and dined.
The assumptions made. The journalistic style of your post as if to say this is all fact; anyone who doubts this is wrong.
Your attitude stinks.
Stop dreaming / setting out exactly who it'll be and listen to us. Then you'll get somewhere.
Goodnight.
There clearly are many thousands of women who want sex but don't have time for all the relationship nonsense. They don't have time for wining and dining, ten-mile hikes or long inane conversations. I'm serious in wanting to know where I can find one so I can be her regular booty call.
I've never trolled. I'm an extremely serious person. I've been told by several people that I'm too honest.
A) I hadn't before raised the topic of finding someone who doesn't have enough time for all the relationship nonsense because she's too busy for all that.
It's known as a fuck buddy.
No, it really is known as a prostitute. Let me break it down:
Fuck buddies and FWB both have some degree of friendship/relationship about them (though not as much as a full relationship). What you are looking for is to eliminate that social interaction completely - here we arrive at a prostitute who is solely in it because it is her day job (and no doubt loves it). You will not have to interact with her in any way other than you see fit because she has money motivating her where others do not. Anyone else you approach will be assessing you as someone they may or may not want to associate and otherwise kernoodle with. This is the only place you will find such a cold, calculated method of having sex with somebody. Do nothing, meet woman willing to have sex with you, have sex, leave, end of story. Ipso facto, a prostitute is what you are describing.
The Site's article entitled fuck buddies says that such an arrangement has no strings, does not involve chatting up, and you get laid regularly. It does not say that it involves a friendship or relationship (although in some cases that happens before or after such an arrangement).
Fuck buddies need have no more social interaction/conversation/psychological involvement than a prostitute and client do.
A high proportion of girlfriends have being bought presents, dinners etc. as a major motivation - that's similar to a prostitute receiving money from her clients except that it's not quite so quid pro quo. I know someone who regularly gives cash to his partner at her demand. If he's late in paying her, she withholds sex from him until he pays her - in reality she's a prostitute with only one client. She also lives in his house, contributing nothing whilst he pays all the bills and does all the housework. A high proportion of women would not be in the relationships they are in if they weren't being bought things frequently by their partners. The female participants in one-night stands have being bought drinks for hours as a motivation.
You need to stop assuming you know everything about the issue you're asking for advice on. The reason you came here is because your current tactic is not working, so there are most definitely flaws in what you think you know. Open your mind, Adam.
Edit: The last point you made is not true. All the assumptions you make and things you think you know about this are not true.
Also the whole thing about wanting a sexual relationship is something I don't get either! It's not about that I don't understand what u want out of a relationship as you have already said but the fact is that your trying to say there's no need to talk to someone first to have sex which is completely wrong! Seriously no one in the world just gets someone like that without having to talk first. That's ridiculous!
You have to get to know someone no matter what. You don't need to wine and dine them or but fancy presents, just talking to them first is all you need to do. Again as I said before making sure you dress smart, asking them a bit about themselves, telling them a bit about you etc. If you really want to get them to properly notice you in a seductive way after you have got to know them a bit then practicing some flirting techniques beforehand is an idea, also giving them compliments relating to how good they look and nothing else, making sure you look smart and put some nice aftersave on as that's what can turn a woman.
The only way your gonna meet someone is not online as you have had no luck before and again your hiding behind a computer screen. You have to meet them face to face as your chances will be high. Do you know if they hold any dating nights in your area or speed dating nights?? That's one way of meeting women. You could try bars or pubs which is less quiet and what open at an earlier time so you don't find loads of people effects you more. Is any of these suggestions helpful??
The only way your get a woman is meeting them face to face and setting a good impression. There's no easier way. You have tried dating websites and other things but you dont seem to have any luck so I think meeting them out would be the best idea. Is there anyone like a mate or family member who can go with you for support??
I think when you eventually meet someone you will start to realise what we have been trying to say to you along about having a sexual relationship. Although, you have to remember that whatever girl you meet that they may not agree with everything what you want and so you will need to compromise with her for example if she works full time and hardly has time for a sexual relationship untill she gets back then you will either have to accept or find someome else but every girl is different so I'm not saying this what all girls will be like only if there is someone like that then you may just have to accept it.
Please keep reaching out and have a look at the site for more advice on what makes a relationship work.
Crazy Cat x
If it were impossible to switch off that side of them, prostitutes would have to get to know their clients really well before having sex with them, otherwise it would be impossible for either party to have sex. He wouldn't be able to get an erection and she wouldn't be able to cope with having sex with him. The fact that a prostitute is typically easily able to have sex with a client within minutes of first meeting him proves that there's no need for two people to know each other well and care about each other for sex to take place between them. A substantial proportion of prostitutes have said in anonymous surveys that they enjoy sex with (some) clients. This proves untrue the assertion by many that a woman cannot enjoy sex unless she knows the man well and he proves that he loves her and cares for her first.
Many people have casual sex without liking the people they hook up with. Many people have said that they'll gladly have sex with people whom they don't like as people, but merely fancy/have good sexual chemistry with.
I'm tackling the subject in pieces, using different angles to try to reach my goal - as was suggested to me.
But you're really not, they're all ending up the same. All you want to know is how to get laid with minimal effort.
I've not said that I'm not willing to talk to them at all. What I'm saying is that I don't want to spend a huge amount of time, money and effort doing so - which is what's been demanded of me.
I've tried asking girls about themselves as well as flirting with them and giving them compliments. I do all that on dating websites nearly every day; I've done it many times in real life as well. My success rate is zero.
I've done speed dating a few times. Each time, I didn't receive any ticks; none of the girls wanted me. The unfavourable male-female ratio in pubs means that whenever an attractive or average-looking female goes there on her own (which isn't very often), the excess men already in there are on her straight away, with more confidence and a better technique than me. I find approaching a group of girls to be impossible - they always see me off within seconds.
No. Hence I lack a 'wingman', which is unofficially compulsory for a man to have when trying to find someone with whom to hook up. There's an unofficial rule that a man can't go out alone to try to get laid. If he tries to do so, he'll be shunned everywhere due to being perceived as a lonely, pathetic, friendless loser who no-one wants to be around. Girls want someone who's popular and successful.
They're intended to do what I said, but the replies are leading them to the same path, which has obstacles on it which I don't know how to surmount.
Not just minimal effort; minimal time and money as well.
The replies are leading them to the same path because your mindset is still the same. You've not listened or taken into account anything that anyone has said over all of your threads.
What you essentially want is to be able to walk up to a girl, say hey and expect her to drop her pants.
My mindset regarding girls hasn't really changed since I was at junior school. I wanted sex with different female classmates back then, despite not yet having the ability to get an erection. I can't see how I can do something as drastic as change the way I view girls with whom I want to have sex. I can't forget about sex and just hang out with them, nor do I want to.
I've read every word on all of the threads that I've posted on. Many of the things contradict what I've seen, heard or know from many other sources. Many other things said don't help me towards my goal. I'm not going to lay down and accept that I have to be a lifelong second-class citizen at the bottom of life's hierarchy in every way merely because I was born autistic and underclass.
When I became a member here, I was expecting that at least one of the people posting here would be a highly successful seducer with a well-practised technique that he would share. Yet again, I'm disappointed. I guess I should have realised that such a person would be out getting laid, not posting on a forum. Virtually all the members here would have arrived in order to find help in order to try to solve their own problems. Successful people with fulfilling lives would be very unlikely to come here in the first place. People who became successful after joining would no longer (need to) be here.
That'd be good, although I realise it's not going to happen. I still don't understand why getting sex should be an expensive, complicated, tedious, confusing struggle full of mindgames and battles.
How can it be that no girl has ever fancied me? I'm not hideously ugly and I don't smell bad. If having a bad personality prevented sexual success, Mick Philpott would be a virgin.
You don't have have to spend so much money on a girl or anything. Just getting to know them and talking to them is what you need to do.
There's been nothing what's happened on the dating websites. You said you messaged girls and spoke to them but no improvement. You need to meet someone face to face as the dating websites isn't helping. You have to meet someone face to face.
I don't know if you have tried giving it a go with the dating nights and speed dating. You need to set a good first impression what I said again and again about looking smart, getting to know them, telling them about you and complimenting them etc. That's what you need to do.
You need to get in there first. You need stand out as I said before about making a good first impression etc. Do you think attending the dating nights on the dating website be a good idea or?
Also you dont need to go out alone. I thought maybe a mate or a family can go with you for support. You don't have to go on your on and some guys do and not every girl thinks that. You could go to a bar or pub which us quiet with not lots of people which is like that etc.
The threads your making is the same but under different titles. That's what it is. That's why the advice is all the same. Its the same before.
The advice is all the same as your the threads are under different titles.
That's why you wanting sex as you said from ages ago and only that is wrong. You cant expect that.
You are talking to girls now and you must know what they want. You been talking to them online
What they been saying?
You need to set a good first impression as said before. That's what you have to do set a good first impression.
You know what girls want now things are different and everything.
This is going round in circles. Dont know about the what other advice is there
x
I've been on dating nights held by dating websites; no-one wanted me. As I said in an earlier post, no-one wanted me at speed dating. I've tried going out smartly dressed and asking about the girls I approach as well as complimenting them - none of them want me. I've tried getting in first, but they don't want me. I fail miserably every time I try to make a good impression. As I said, I don't have anyone to go along with when going out in the evening. When going out on my own I'm shunned. The unfavourable male-female ratio at every venue I've been to (regardless of how many people are there) means that I can't compete.
I appear to have no attributes that are sought after. There's nothing about me that's appealing in any way. Hence there's always someone who's unanimously considered significantly better than me, no matter where I go.
So nothing we're saying can possibly be correct? You are far too sure of yourself and what you think you know. Though of course we, the people having sex, could be wrong and you, the person not having sex, could be correct.
You will NEVER find this information because this information DOES NOT exist. Do you understand that? Even if someone did have a well practiced technique and they shared it with you, it wouldn't work. Because you would not be that person and you wouldn't be having sex with the same people. It isn't transferable. People are different (yes, even all women are different). It's like you're on a quest to find Bigfoot or The Gruffalo.
Would you rather listen to us and have a chance at this, or continue with your pipe dream and never have sex?