Hmmm..Problem

Former Member

God i'm embarassed writing this and none of you even know me. I have a lump in my left breast, it hurts to touch. Normally i'd go straight to my mum and then the doctor whatever...but i self-harm and i badly cut up all across my stomach a few days ago and i can't risk anyone seeing it.i don't really know what to do because i'm going on holiday mon night/tues mornin and i can't get to my doctors surgery before monday (no consultations on a sunday) and i'm not that worried (not that kinda person, i'm aware it could be serious) and i dont want to unneccessarily worry my family. and anyway i have a phobia of doctors and don't want him commentin on my self harming (i'm getting through it myself.slowly but getting there)so yeh what do i do? any coments appreciated.thanks:)
xxx

Former Member

go to the doctor, if he sees the self harm he might be able to help you with that too. its a win win situation.

Former Member

If you're not comfortable with your doctor ask to see the practise nurse. I've found them to be more understanding, personally.
The lump isn't likely to be anything serious, but please go get checked out & like Rainbow said, you could get some help in regards to the self-harm, or at least advice.

Former Member

hmm..i spose so i jus...have refused to go see my doctor about the self-harm since i've been doing it (20 months) and i wouldn't know what to say.oh and thanks:) do you think i should wait till after my holiday..it's only a week?
xxx

Former Member

Originally posted by Girl_gunner
do you think i should wait till after my holiday..it's only a week?
xxx

I think you should go before. Get it out of the way & be free to enjoy your holiday - you'd only be dreading it when you got back, right? It's sucky enough getting home after a holiday anyway. Also, I've never had a nurse press the issue with me after I'd made it clear that it wasn't up for discussion. I just let them know it was being dealt with separately. If you really don't want to get into it, just be firm with them. Although they can give good advice, especially with caring for cuts/wounds etc and reducing scaring.
I know it's embarrasing as hell, but grit your teeth and get it done & go and have a fab holiday.

Former Member

please go to the doctor darling, this lump needs to be checked out just to be clear as to what it is, you dont need to accept treatment about the self-harming if you really dont want to, but maybe help could stop you doing this to yourself or at least make medical profesionals aware of this, please.

Former Member

i can't deal with the doctor even commenting he's mean. and the nurses ain't that nice either. and i'll have to tell my mum.coz i live in a shitey village. an the doctors is in the nex shitey village. and if she sees the cuts i can't bear her shouting at me again.argh this is so stupid i cant deal with any form of life situation [/rant]
xxx

Former Member

Originally posted by Girl_gunner
i can't deal with the doctor even commenting he's mean. and the nurses ain't that nice either. and i'll have to tell my mum.coz i live in a shitey village. an the doctors is in the nex shitey village. and if she sees the cuts i can't bear her shouting at me again.argh this is so stupid i cant deal with any form of life situation [/rant]
xxx

you won't have to tell your mum - just tell her you've got a lump and you wouldn't feel comfortable showing her, but would she be able to take you to the doctor, just to put your mind at rest.

though i know it doesn't feel like it, sometimes a doctor accidentally seeing your cuts can be the best thing that happens to you *recovered self harmer*

Former Member

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Former Member

I'm gonna wait till after my holiday.my mums in a pretty bad mood with me and i darent say anything.i'm the kind of person that wenever people try and help i just throw it back in their faces...which doesn't work too well.hmm..i spose i'll jus have to go to the doctor wen i get back. the nearest town is 7 miles and i have no idea about a drop-in centre i might look it up tho thanks:)if i did id go on my own..id want a friend their but i couldnt tell them.god i make my life difficult. thanks for all your advice..much appreciated:)
xxx

Former Member

Good luck, you're doing the right thing. It's a good idea to take a friend, even if you don't tell them what's wrong, at least they can take your mind off things whilst you're waiting. Tates

Former Member

Originally posted by Girl_gunner
i can't deal with the doctor even commenting he's mean.

He is bound by confidentiality, anything you say to him, anything he says to you, anything he sees on your body is all in his confidentiality agreement. He would not speak to your mam about it, he would get seriously hung if he did.

now back on topic. You know you have to get it checked out and I think you know the sooner you go the better, when things are left they can turn serious but if you catch stuff early then chances are it wont be as serious.
What you probably have is a cyst or something similar. Are you due a period because that also does make you feel tender and sometimes feel lumps.
Your probably worrying yourself sick so do the right thing and get it checked............pretty pleaseeeeee

Former Member

/\/\/\/\What they said/\/\/\/\

You may want to consider addressing your self harm too, 20 months is a long time to be scarring yourself, and a long time to be hurting. Take better care of yourself and be brave ... your nurse or GP finding out may actually be one big relief. You could try writing down how you feel/ why you do it if you find it hard to talk abiout, and take the paper with you...?


But as the others have said, if you can't take that jump yet then just say you are only there to discuss the lump.

*hugs*

Susie


PS - You've probably seen this already but self harm advice on TheSite

Former Member

Ok i know what everyone is saying is right but...what if i like have cancer? my weak pathetic emotional/mental state couldn't cope and even thinkin about im plannin suicide.blunt yet true. id rather not know.
xxx

Former Member

Please don't think like this sweetheart. I know it's a really scary thought, but like everyone else has said it's probably nothing, it would be extremely rare for someone your age to have breast cancer. And even if it was something serious, you'd find a way to face it. People have an amazing ability to face what life throws at them, in some way. It might not be easy, but when put in that situation you just have to find a way of dealing with it. Please be strong, and get yourself to your docs as soon as possible, and hopefully all this worrying will soon be behind you. Hugs, Tates xxx

Former Member

Originally posted by Girl_gunner
Ok i know what everyone is saying is right but...what if i like have cancer?

Sorry im going to be blunt here

IF and its a big IF because it probably is not cancer then you be thankful that you hopefully have caught it early enough, keep leaving it and what may have been cured could just have cost you your life.
Leaving something which could be cancerous is the wrong thing to do, catch it early enough and you stop it spreading or going to far.

Sorry dont mean to sound harsh but if it were cancer then your best catch it sooner rather than later

I really think you should see a doc and get your other problems sorted, maybe not all together but see him about this lump and also see about your self harm. You dont have to keep suffering like you are currently, go get some help and im sure once you actually start talking about your problems then you will feel a huge weight lifted and start recovery

Former Member

Heeeeeey! Ok i'm back from my holiday i had a lovely time the lumop has got [much] smaller and i haven#t cut for 2 weeks. thanks everyone for their advice i'm gonna try nad get an appointment by the end of the week:)
xxx

Former Member

Originally posted by Girl_gunner
Heeeeeey! Ok i'm back from my holiday i had a lovely time the lumop has got [much] smaller and i haven#t cut for 2 weeks. thanks everyone for their advice i'm gonna try nad get an appointment by the end of the week:)
xxx

well done you

hope the appointment goes well....