Home Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

What Should I Say to Her?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
A friend of mine recently told people she had been raped. We all really supported her etc even when she wouldn't go to the police. She then started saying that the guy who did it was stalking her and wouldn't leave her alone. This went on for about 4 months. Yesterday morning she came into college saying that this guy was threatning to kill her. We begged her to go to the police but she just sat there and stared into space. After about 3 minutes of silence she confessed that she had made the whole thing up from the very beginning.
Maybe I did the wrong thing, but I had to leave the room. I was raped 4 years ago (which this girl knew) and couldn't face talking to her. Maybe I sound selfish but I just can't face this girl at the moment. Why would she say something like this? It's not even like shes got no friends and needs the attention. Shes the most popular girl on my course. I'd be grateful for any advice you can give, about how to approach her about it etc. Thanks. <IMG alt="image" SRC="confused.gif" border="0">


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm really sorry to hear you were raped.
    I think your friend has one serious attention seeking problem! Does she have any other major problems, at home or with friends or anything? Cos that could be a reason why she made up something like this, like maybe asking for help?
    Careful u don't ruin your friendship though, even if you are angry - which u have a right to be. Maybe stay away for a while and see what happens. Either that or explain why u are angry, might help <IMG alt="image" SRC="smile.gif" border="0">
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the advice. As far as I know, everything else in her life is OK. She gets on well with both her parents, has a really nice, caring boyfriend etc.
    I just can't understand why she's done this knowing that I'm still suffering/hurting so much. In a way I guess, its reminded me of the reality of what I went through. Maybe I'll sit her down and have a chat tomorrow.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Even if she is popular, she still seems to need to be the centre of attention (how you see her is not the same as how she sees herself). She must have felt she had to make up that story to get sympathy from you and your friends.

    Best to sit down and tell her how you feel.
Sign In or Register to comment.