what would you say is better..

Former Member

being a couple who see each other all the time (kinda like being best mates and a couple)

or a couple who have lots of other friends and happenings, seeing each other few times a week?

and also could 'few times a week' relationship grow into a 'best mates as well, see each other all the time' relationship?
(obviously both happy and comfortable with it)
and would that be for the best or for the worst?

i'm hoping people getz me........

Former Member

Personaly i think a bit of both, you cant spend too much time with you bf/gf cause your friends want to spend time with you aswell............ unless your a prick. but ill assume if you have a partner then your probly not.
I think it works best when you and your partner have the same friends then you can hang out with your friends together in the day and you have all evening to be alone.

Former Member

Re: what would you say is better..

Originally posted by molo


or a couple who have lots of other friends and happenings, seeing each other few times a week?

Usually this works better - it's unhealthy to have a consuming relationship which doesn't allow you to have a life apart from your partner. And a few times a week isn't that seldom! :rolleyes:

Former Member

i feel like a right weird cus i would like to see her everysingle day!
but i'm gonna sort my life out and go skate with my mates more and do more hip hop shows!

(by the way on thursday i did my first live performace Mc'ing at this club/bar sorta place and i was HEAVY! if anyone cares....)

cheers for opinions, we very nearly split up over this, but after a 45 minute phone call in which we decided to think about what we want, she sent a txt ten mins later sayin she needs me, and we have both come to an agreement which will make us even stronger! YAY

Former Member

My boyfriend is my best mate (well, one of them before my friends get offended) and I'd love to see him all the time but I agree that sometimes it gets too consuming if you do this. A few times a week sounds fine to me. I usually only see my boyfriend at the weekends as we're both at school, but over the holidays we've been known to spend days and days together without problems.

As long as you know that you can go out with your friends as well, and you don't neglect them for your other half, I think that you can't really see each other too much. Just depends on other committments such as work or studying!

Former Member

Originally posted by lisa simpson's saxophone
My boyfriend is my best mate (well, one of them before my friends get offended) and I'd love to see him all the time but I agree that sometimes it gets too consuming if you do this

were you like best mates and couple straight away or was it something that developed as the relationship grew?

obviously i'm not sure what exactly i want as i'm only 'ickle' but i think deep down thats what i'd love to have, my girl being my best friend as well... but i dunno!

don't get it twisted though, i am happy with her

Former Member

Originally posted by molo
i feel like a right weird cus i would like to see her everysingle day!

No that's not weird at all! There's no reason why you shouldn't want to see her as much as possible, but the point is finding a balance between her and friends, and other areas of your life - that's what's important. But it seems the two of you have realised that, so good for you hope it all works out well now.

Former Member

Originally posted by molo
were you like best mates and couple straight away or was it something that developed as the relationship grew?

Well, I knew him for a while before we got together. We both really liked each other but, like I said before, I was going out with someone else. We ended up just resolved to be good friends. After I broke up with the guy I was with, I still didn't think we could get together, so we promised we'd still be really good mates. Once we did get together it was just like the usual coupley stuff - we were quite nervous and shy around each other at first, which just felt normal, but now we're in a steady relationship we're just like best friends as well as boyfriend and girlfriend.

I think it's something which happens in a lot of relationships though, regardless of whether you know each other beforehand or not. Sounds like you know what you want but you know that you can't force it either. Like PD said, don't neglect other parts of your life for her - as well as keeping things balanced for you, it'll give you interesting things to talk about with her, and therefore make the 'friendship' thing happen too!

Hope things go well for you two.

LSS

Former Member

Re: what would you say is better..

Originally posted by molo
and also could 'few times a week' relationship grow into a 'best mates as well, see each other all the time' relationship?

I think all successful relationships turn into this after a while.

I don't thinl couples should spend every waking moment together, it can get unhealthy and one person invariably starts to resent the other person after a while.

Me and my boyfriend have been together for over four years now and at first we saw each other every single day, all day. We would go trhough patches where we just fought non stop. It was only once I turned 18 and we could go out with our other mates on a Friday night that things started to improve, so I would say it is best to have other things to do. That doesn't mean you can't share friends though. I think that is healthy.

Former Member

i prefer the seeing each other about once a week thing....i live with my fella and get sick to death of him!

i told him if i win the lottery, i'd buy us flats next door to each other and he could come for tea every friday night but the rest of the week i don't see him.

Former Member

stinger and i are best friends we live away from each other so we cant see each other every day.but when were together we dont get sick of eachother-least i dont think we do!!


kitten xxxx