How long until the spark goes?

BillieTheBot

I was just wondering, how long is it usually until the intial spark of a relationship goes, the fluttery feeling in the stomach when seeing them, and just before seeing them etc? Because ive been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, and its still there, so how long until it usually goes?It just appears to be here for a long time not that im complaining.

Former Member

In my last relationship it was about 6 months I think.....it was that long til we had our first argument. Guess it's different for everyone though!

Former Member

It lasted well over two years for me but we were living apart (In different cities) for 18 months. Its strange, I don't often get it anymore and sometimes I miss it which is why I have crushes on other people because it means that feeling returns for a while,..

But ...even if the fluttery thing goes it doesn't mean your relationship is dead in the water, after that comes deep love and trust and a different kind of warmth.

It would be wrong to chase the fluttering stomach your whole life when you can still get happiness from all the other things

Former Member

I still have the butterfly feeliongs with my man and I've been with him for 2 years and living with him for a year. We were talking about this today actually, I asked him if he thought we'd still be this lovey dovey in 10 years time and he said yes

I still get butterflys when I see him driving into the carpark to pick me up from work

Former Member

The butterflies in my stomach are still fluttering away after 3 years

Former Member

with me and my last bf they left him after like 3 months, but ive still got them very much so. not a lot i cant do about it tho. ah well, i'll live.

Former Member

The spark doesn't have to go. It just fades from time to time and you begin to wonder "what if...?" I think this happens in all relationships once you begin to get stuck in a routine.
The natural excitement will wear off, as you get used to one another and become more comfortable.

If you're worried and you want ti rekindle some of that lost spark, try spending a little time apart, or doing more interesting things - visit new places and do new things. Or perhaps you could start dating again - make sure you go places rather than slobbing out around each others houses, which I am sure most couples end up doing, I know we do!

Former Member

Posted by BumbleBee:

try spending a little time apart, or doing more interesting things

Exactly. Unless your partner is an eternal mystery to you, then you'll eventually get to the stage where you both know a lot about each other and it seems as if the relationship has got stale. Take some time out from each other or find a new activity to do either together or individually so you can have something to share.

Former Member

Re: How long until the spark goes?

Originally posted by MoonShiner
I was just wondering, how long is it usually until the intial spark of a relationship goes, the fluttery feeling in the stomach when seeing them, and just before seeing them etc? Because ive been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, and its still there, so how long until it usually goes?It just appears to be here for a long time not that im complaining.

I read somewhere most women have a thing that sets off in their heads after 3 or 4 years - I knew a girl that seem to fit this - took her 3 to 4 years to realise she was dating an idiot!! Thing was the rest of us knew in days!!