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boyfriend probs
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
So the guy I've been dating for a little over 2 months showed me a different side to himself last night. He's had his trouble with cops and all, had his license revoked and is trying to get it back. He's done nothing major like hurt or rob anyone- they are all traffic violations that he never took care of and now he's paying for it. I've known from the beggining that he "hated" cops, though I myself thought he should be just take responsibility for his actions.
Last night we were watching the news and it was showing an update on an officer who had been killed on Christmas Eve while trying to capture some escaped convicts. The officer left behind a wife and a few small children. My boyfriend cheered and said something to the effect of "one less pig on the earth". I've heard countless "pig" remarks and have even participated in them when I'm pissed. But the extent of his anger and contempt was astounding. We argued for nearly an hour- me pointing out that he is accountable for his screw ups, that yes, some cops are shady but they do not all deserve to die and him yelling that they were shitty, horrible, useless pigs that needed to be wiped out completely.
We slept in different rooms and I said nothing to him when I left for work this morning. I don't know how I can love someone with so much hatred inside, and how he could possibly love me purely when he has that bitterness.
Any advice? I'm lost and very sad.
Last night we were watching the news and it was showing an update on an officer who had been killed on Christmas Eve while trying to capture some escaped convicts. The officer left behind a wife and a few small children. My boyfriend cheered and said something to the effect of "one less pig on the earth". I've heard countless "pig" remarks and have even participated in them when I'm pissed. But the extent of his anger and contempt was astounding. We argued for nearly an hour- me pointing out that he is accountable for his screw ups, that yes, some cops are shady but they do not all deserve to die and him yelling that they were shitty, horrible, useless pigs that needed to be wiped out completely.
We slept in different rooms and I said nothing to him when I left for work this morning. I don't know how I can love someone with so much hatred inside, and how he could possibly love me purely when he has that bitterness.
Any advice? I'm lost and very sad.
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Comments
After the police helped him out his attitude towards them changed. He used to think the cops sole purpose in life was to make peoples lifes hell when infact it it to help make peeps lifes NOT hell.
Once you b/f realises that the cops are there to "serve and protect" he'll realise how much of a twat he has been.
It's like your egging him on if you argue with him to some degree
Just agree with him next time to shut him up. It saves a lot of hassle
Plus I doubt the dick head really thinks like that, Just saying it to get a reaction out of you. And it works!
If he really means that then he's a cunt:p
hehehe you punished him by withdrawing sex. I sense that I might have that done to me a lot in the future
Language harmless!!!
Maybe he does hate police that much....maybe he was done badly by them....or he reaalllyyy fancies women in uniform and its trying to cover up?
Why not dress up as a pi.....policewoman/tell him your joining the police and see his reaction
Everyone's agreeing he's bigoted and unpleasant for having an attitude like that towards the police, and if you feel disturbed by that then tell him. Don't pick a time when he's already worked up, but talk about it when you're both calm and in a different situation; just tell him that his venomous attitude worries you, and maybe it'll help to discuss it.
Also, don't feel that just because he can show such hatred it means he can't love you. Love and hate are very much intertwined; it just means he feels things very intensely. His attitude towards the police may be worrying but it doesn't (and shouldn't) affect your relationship.
may i suggest someone slightly less inclined to breaking the law? is he that much of a prick he can't learn from his own mistakes? i read things like this and i can't believe the stupidity of some people. the world.... downward spiral? never. :rolleyes:
the comment about the dead policeman was WAY out of order, sure, hate the police for YOUR fuckups, but actually being glad when one dies? that's just sick. i bet he pulled the wings off daddy long legs when he was little too.
sick cunt.
People hate things . . . like my bfriend (in the army) hates the TA for some reason but he still loves me! He puts the fingers up to them, calls them pricks etc but it doesn't mean he's a nasty person :rolleyes: he just has opinions that I don't agree with & same for me! I hate Teachers sometimes but thats life huni
I don't know how I can love someone with so much hatred inside, and how he could possibly love me purely when he has that bitterness.
I think that is abit over the top :eek2: If it's bothering you so much then talk to him . . . but try not to argue.
Hey - GOOD FOR YOU for standing your ground and voicing your opinion. There are many people who would just laugh it off and not comment because they don't want to upset their relationship. you have proved to him that you aren't always going to agree blindly with what he says and by arguing with him I expect you've had some influence on his behaviour. On the other hand he may just carry on with the comments to get a rise out of you.
You need to decide if there are enough reasons to like him to stay with him and whether you can overlook his comments or infact if you really believe that he means everything he says.
If he doesn't apologise or modify his behaviour it may start to piss you off so much that the relationship will come to a natural end.
I would guess that if he was in serious trouble he would be grateful for the police force. the police are an easy target for un-PC comments and slagging off. he knows this, but I'm sure he also sees the worth in the police force too.
I did that :eek2:
As for the cop thing. If he hates cops then let him hate cops. It shouldn't effect your relationship. You obviously have different views than him but really your not going to change the way he thinks about cops so theres no point in arguing over it. Let him know how you feel in a nice way and then thats that, you have your opinion and he has his.
he would want them to do there job. tell him the his closed minded nature is affecting the way you feel towards him. this should open up his mind a bit more if not the bop again.