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Hypothetically Speaking.....

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Imagine you were a 16 year old lad, into girls, music and havin a laugh....(A fairly typical teenager)
You fancy this girl, and she fancies you back....BUT, she's frigid and says that it's highly unlikely that there'd be any sexual contact....AND that she is scared of kissing.
Would you go for it and have a relationship with her or not?
What do u think....?
Personally, I'm not sure...
SweetLeaf X

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Hypothetically Speaking.....
    Originally posted by SweetLeaf
    Imagine you were a 16 year old lad, into girls, music and havin a laugh....(A fairly typical teenager)
    You fancy this girl, and she fancies you back....BUT, she's frigid and says that it's highly unlikely that there'd be any sexual contact....AND that she is scared of kissing.
    Would you go for it and have a relationship with her or not?
    What do u think....?
    Personally, I'm not sure...
    SweetLeaf X

    Yes, definently. I've never had a problem with people scared of intimacy, I'd like to be able to help them out and go at their pace in a relationship... and even if they didn't, to be honest I really just don't care about having sex that much.

    Although I suppose pretty much all 16 year old boys wouldn't want to get into a relationship like that though. We're generally not a very nice bunch of people at all you see, lol. :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I got to know her then yes!

    but imaging i were 16year old, I doubt I would want a relationship or anything like that, Just sexual stuff.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Harmless
    If I got to know her then yes!

    but imaging i were 16year old, I doubt I would want a relationship or anything like that, Just sexual stuff.

    Take it from a man with much experience... :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I were a "typical 16 year old lad" then no, I doubt I would be interested in that sort of relationship. But if I'm me, then yes, that sort of relationship would be great.

    From the opposite perspective though, if I were a 16 year old girl who didn't like the idea of kissing and wasn't into sex, then I wouldn't want to alter myself just for the sake of some guy, either.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Hypothetically Speaking.....
    Originally posted by SweetLeaf
    Imagine you were a 16 year old lad, into girls, music and havin a laugh....(A fairly typical teenager)
    You fancy this girl, and she fancies you back....BUT, she's frigid and says that it's highly unlikely that there'd be any sexual contact....AND that she is scared of kissing.
    Would you go for it and have a relationship with her or not?
    What do u think....?
    Personally, I'm not sure...
    SweetLeaf X
    No, I dont' think I would go for it. Maybe give it a go if she could explain it to me, and there was a chance she would get over it. But to be honest with you, I still don't think I would. But that's me personaly. To me kissing, cuddling, hugging, and sex, are all part of a relationship, and it wouldn't feel like a proper relationship otherwise. What would be left? - just friends.

    Mr_Wobble ;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if i was a guy what would i do..........hmmmm...i dunno really.
    well being a gal aged 16 i would never go wit a guy who hadnt kissed it would feel wrong to me.

    and i know this isnt part of the topic but harmless and lacymay are you going out cos in the posts you write you kind of give off that impression. tell me if im being to nosiy(sp)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: Re: Hypothetically Speaking.....
    Originally posted by Mr_Wobble
    To me kissing, cuddling, hugging, and sex, are all part of a relationship, and it wouldn't feel like a proper relationship otherwise. What would be left? - just friends.

    He's got a point there. If there's nothing, not even kissing, then what would be the actual point? It would be like 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' were titles, with no actual point.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you calling her frigid or is that a word she has used to describe herself? Just because she doesn't feel ready for sex, or have much experience of issing, doesn't mean she's fridgid.

    She may just be waiting for the right person and perhaps thats not you!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Zella

    and i know this isnt part of the topic but harmless and lacymay are you going out cos in the posts you write you kind of give off that impression. tell me if im being to nosiy(sp)

    Where have you been recently hmmm?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by byny
    Are you calling her frigid or is that a word she has used to describe herself? Just because she doesn't feel ready for sex, or have much experience of issing, doesn't mean she's fridgid.

    She may just be waiting for the right person and perhaps thats not you!

    hypothetically speaking I think Sweetleaf is the girl rather than the boy - she's worried about how guys see her.

    I've read your other thread, and seriously Sweetleaf, when it feels right, you'll find that your fear of getting intimate (mentally and physically) and kissing will disappear and melt away.

    There's no such word as frigid ;) just take your time. The more you analyse and convince yourself you can never kiss someone you love, the harder it will get. Don't worry about that prat of an ex. Just enjoy yourself and when you meet someone else you like, go with the flow and try to stop worrying about it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it wouldnt matter to me at all - im not 16, but i am 15 so i know. but im not like everyone else, im the one everyone rips for breakfast, lunch and dinner. but then again im not desperate, i have the best girlfriend ever and im happy. she is not scared as such of intamacy but does want to move slowly, which i respect entirely. in fact it makes it better because the physical stuff gets boring too fast if you do everything at once. anyway even if my girlfriend told me she is scared of kissing i would just say i am as well. highly unlikely that there will be any sexual contact - well i don't expect any to tell the truth so ill just adapt, i don't have any expectations of her, and anything she wants to do im ok with, unless of course i dont want to myself...

    but sweetleaf, if the guys you want to go out with think that it does matter then obviously they arent the ones you should be looking for. and dont worry that they are all the same because they arent. see in my upbringing which was quite tough to say the least i taught myself not to rely on anything, so i dont. i dont depend on anything, when its there its good, but if it goes im just back to where i was. i think my girlfriend is changing this though - if i lost her i would be upset.....
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