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Unprotected sex...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Heya
Well basically its such a passion killer to have to stop foreplay and put on protection - we have tried it without it twice, but both times i was really scared that i wouldnt be able to make myself pull out when the time 'came'.. (sorry appalling pun!)
she will be getting the injection contraception thingy soon but in the mean time how can i discipline myself?!

O

Everyone makes mistakes
I create disasters
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hmm well I don't know much, but I am sure that I've been told that this isn't a reliable method of contraception?! Even if you do manage to withdraw before you actually come, there's still some pre-cum or something, which contains some sperm, so she could get pregnant without you properly ejaculating. Is it really worth the worry a pregnancy could cause you both? expecially if she's getting something soon, its not like you have to wait forever.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    true..
    ah so frustrating :P
    oh well im off to see her in 2 hours yay!

    O
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dont mean to sound out of order or nething but isnt it being a bit irresposible not using protection or nething? Even if it does spoil the fun, aftall this is how accidents happen!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeh of course its irresponsible - but ok so its not a good reason but it adds to the fun..
    also condoms are so damn expensive!getting em free doesnt work either really, they give you like two and say 'now dont use them all at once!' which kinda doesnt happen <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    and it just feels better without and so much better not to have to stop...
    ah wel poor excuses i know. i will just be very careful until she gets her injection thingy.

    O

    Everyone makes mistakes
    I create disasters
    Website
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    until she's on the "pill" (injection), u should not have unprotected sex, simple as that. too much can go wrong, too complex.

    personally, i think ur a fucking tight ass for saying condoms are too expensive. think of it this way - a baby costs more. use ur head.

    Look into these tired eyes. See something you might recognise.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    down the pbu i could get a pack of rough rider condoms for £1 you get 5 in a pack, so your telling me thats to expensive? look at borris becker he has to pay like £32000 for every second of sex he had, he only lasted 5 seconds! y dont u put the condom on BEFORE forplay? get her to turn u on, put it on then turn her on and do what ever you want. I got a feeling in a week he'll be back saying my g/f is pregnant what shall i do...

    Oh and the brook centers my g/f's in the past have been to always got 3 packects with 10 condoms in and could go back for more when ever they wanted, they even sold some of the condoms for like 10p each cos you get them for free and so many.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think what u r doing is really stupid....sorry to be so harsh but its a fact. Would your girlfriend be happy when she finds out she is pregnant....would u infact be happy about it coz thats what will happen if u carry on using this method that u r not even managing to do. Even if u did withdraw its still likely she would get pregnant, the only safe way to prevent his would be a condom or the pill...do one or the other before u end up with a child. I am a young single mum and its really bloody hard, dont take the risk unless u r willing to give up your life and support a child that u never really planned to have anyway!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sorry if I sound mean but it's stupid. IMHO, an STD or a baby would be slightly more a passion killer than putting on a condom.

    And again, a baby could be a huge amount more expensive than a condom also.

    Just put the thing on earlier!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Me and my mate Brian had this discussion earlier.

    It all comes down to that the boy is usally far to fucking lazy to put on a condom or doesn't wanna pay a quid for them - they'd much rather spend the money on alcohol.

    Brian, who has been shagging a girl 2 years younger than him (she was 13 when they first had sex, he was 15) says that he always "pulls out" and she is on the pill. I say to him bollocks mate. I am gonna laugh in your face the day you come to school telling us your gonna be a dad cos you won't be able to handle it. Brian is good with kids but he ain't mature at all!

    Also, on my part, i always find the time to get the condom (and remember there is the chance of it splitting and that ickle 2% failure rate). I owe it to the lass that i am gonna be shagging to wear protection and to bring it to the fore instead of me relying on her. That way, if something terrible goes wrong, ie, she gets pregnant, at least we can blame it on fault rather than stupidity (but i don't really know what point i am trying to make with that comment).

    : Ross @ Ross Project :
    : www.rossproject.co.uk :

    : a weblog :
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    U cant just rely on the injection, u still hav other things 2 think about. And it sounds to me like u need to re-think about ur attitude towards this whole business. Sorry.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hello oliy, welcome to thesite. it's a nice place with nice people. you should stay awhile.

    stopping to put on a condom doesn't have to be a mood kill dude.

    talk to her about making it a part of the foreplay routine. her putting a condom on you can be incredibly erotic if done right. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    she can slowly apply it, while keeping ur eyes locked... and then she can stroke it some before you guys get to it...

    just try to think of it as leading to something and not stopping something and you should be fine. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    good luck dude.
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    OMG!!! so stupid. you sound like my best m8's on/off boyfriend, such a selfish wanker he is.

    he always uses the excuses about it ruining spontenaeity, that he cant feel anything, that he's not going to see her for 2 weeks so it wont matter "just this once", crap crap crap crap crap!!!

    the poor girl has had about 10 pregnancy scares. shes stupid to go along with it, but well. she's naive. your gf is stupid to go along with you too. im not going to be all kind and gentle to you, because you are being STUPID. my friends bf ruined her field trip to new york coz they had unprotected sex that weekend, myself and another friend made her take the emergency contraceptive pill, she threw up jsut before getting on the train to london, and so we had to go and find a FPC/brook in london to get her another one and she felt like shit for the 3 days we were in new york.

    all of that could have been saved if the bloke had WORN A CONDOM! dont be so fucking tight, its alright for you, you dont have to face the decision of terminating a pregnancy, something in your own body, for the rest of your life, or carrying the baby to term for 9 months, every day being reminded of your stupidity, to have it adopted... or to bring up a child, you can just bugger off like other irresponsible teenage fathers. THINK abotu your actions. either wear a condom or DONT HAVE SEX. simple choice.

    I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
    ~ the late, great Douglas Adams
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hehe when i went to Brook, there was a basket of condoms on all the coffee tables <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt;
    call me imature but i thought it was funny <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt;
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Calvin:
    hello oliy, welcome to thesite. it's a nice place with nice people. you should stay awhile.

    very nice people <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    Originally posted by Turtle:
    i think ur a fucking tight ass
    Originally posted by Bunnykins:
    You are obviously not mature enough
    Originally posted by lolly:
    I think what u r doing is really stupid
    Originally posted by freya:
    Sorry if I sound mean but it's stupid
    Originally posted by Ross:
    boy is usally far to fucking lazy
    Originally posted by ~*Heaven Scent*~:
    And it sounds to me like u need to re-think about ur attitude towards this whole business
    Originally posted by GFM:
    OMG!!! so stupid. you sound like my best m8's on/off boyfriend, such a selfish wanker he is.

    Well thanks calvin for at least giving me advice without biting my head off!
    for everyone else's information i have discussed the whole issue with her, we have made a decision. thats what mature people can do. neither of us force each other into sex and i would hate for it to ever be like that. it is not me being lazy or tight. i am stating the issues concerned with my view on the matter as a considered decision to do what both me and my girlfriend want to. i would greatly appreciate a little more respect from those who do not know me who might like to get to know me before they make assumptions on my character.
    I happen to be fully aware of all the issues raised - i admit i did not mention my knowledge of that, but for one of you to say that would have been fine, i would have appreciated the concern and attempt to make sure i was fully informed. however, for so many of you to repeat that message and add personal insults is unneccesary. for example, the idea of recieving advice from this message board is for it to be varied because of the rich tapestry of life from which people on here originate. this variedness would hopefully result in a wide range of ideas and advice, however most of you have proved your immaturity by following like sheep the general idea, with no intention of helping me at all.

    Thankyou for your time.

    thanks calvin, cara. at least you two managed to give advice without insulting me!

    Everyone makes mistakes
    I create disasters
    Website
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wow. eloquent. if i knew u personally, i'd probably've smacked u one by the about the third line.

    u asked a quention, we answered it. we dont give a fuck if u knew what we were telling u or not, we gave you a fucking answer to your question.

    no, wait. i got that wrong. u told us something and we think you're fucking stupid, and we told you.

    in the process, we told u how to discipline urself - don't have sex until u grow up.

    yes, we are mature here. but i, personally, am not. so i'm gonna tell u to fuck off and stop thinking ur so far above us. cos apparently u already know everything.

    so my words of advice are fuck off and leave us alone, and dont come crying to us when ur gf get pregnant, cos i think the vast majority of us will simply laugh at you and feel sorry for the girl for sleeping with you.


    Look into these tired eyes. See something you might recognise.
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    FYI i did not follow what everyone else said, i read a couple of replies before decided i couldnt wait any longer to inform you of your complete lack of sexual knowledge and common sense.

    okay if you and your gf have made a decision, you have made a silly and immature one, do you not know the risks? the rhythm method is SO inaccurate its not funny. and there you are saying you dont even know if you can manage to pull out in time?! what do you expect us to say? very sorry if our application of common sense here offends you. i didnt add personal insults, i merely said that your actions were stupid, and commented on my friends bf and said HE was a selfish wanker.

    i think this is a serious issue and not one that should be dealt with by beating about the bush. people should KNOW that its either sex plus condom, or the pill/injection and monogamy and no STIs, or NO SEX. its very basic and not difficult to understand.

    every time you sleep with your gf, you are risking getting her pregnant, on a fairly large scale. forget the crap about the time of the month, whether you pull out or not. its a huge risk, even if semen goes anywhere NEAR your gf's vagina. no one's making "assumptions on your character" that i can see. they're telling itlike it is, offering advice in a forceful manner, because its such a serious issue!!

    the responses arent going to be varied because as it has been mentioned before, we are mainly mature here and have an ounce of common sense between us. we all have the same opinion because it is scientific FACT that the method you are using is unreliable and should not be used just for the reasons you've stated. not even like you're allergic to latex ffs. wouldnt be an excuse anyway coz you can get non-latex condoms.

    we ARE trying to help you, by making you see how stupid whjat you are currently doing is, and stopping you from doing it again, and risking getting your gf pregnant.

    next time i wont bother. sometimes i really hate this place.

    I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
    ~ the late, great Douglas Adams
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    basically oliy all these other people did was be homest and tell the TRUTH about how stupid ur 'method' of contraception is!!! ok if u can't deal with that then u shouldn't even b considering sex and writing about ur stupidity like its a joke!!!!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    okay well no one actually read what i wrote.
    i am aware of the risks, all of them
    so is my girlfriend
    so thanks for your advice (repeated how ever many times it was)
    thanks for your insults (i probably deserve most of em)
    however, it is our decision. its not like im going to blame anyone in here for any possible consequences.
    well didnt i get off to a great start here?!
    such a lovely forum <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    btw fyi i do feel bad about it and im not going to do it again until she gets the injection. again, i have told her this and we are agreed. i have to say tho that the answers posted here have basically made me more mad and determined to go out and prove you all wrong, not because of the advice in your replies but because of the insults which accompanied them.
    im not going to do that tho.
    so you see a forceful reply is much more effective than an insulting one.

    Can we wipe the slate clean? i wouldnt like to leave this forum because i do feel it could potentially help me a great deal, and i also hope that i could help some other people with their queries/problems

    Once again thanks for your time.

    O

    Everyone makes mistakes
    I create disasters
    Website
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Oliy:
    Well thanks calvin for at least giving me advice without biting my head off!
    for everyone else's information i have discussed the whole issue with her, we have made a decision. thats what mature people can do. neither of us force each other into sex and i would hate for it to ever be like that. it is not me being lazy or tight. i am stating the issues concerned with my view on the matter as a considered decision to do what both me and my girlfriend want to. i would greatly appreciate a little more respect from those who do not know me who might like to get to know me before they make assumptions on my character.
    I happen to be fully aware of all the issues raised - i admit i did not mention my knowledge of that, but for one of you to say that would have been fine, i would have appreciated the concern and attempt to make sure i was fully informed. however, for so many of you to repeat that message and add personal insults is unneccesary. for example, the idea of recieving advice from this message board is for it to be varied because of the rich tapestry of life from which people on here originate. this variedness would hopefully result in a wide range of ideas and advice, however most of you have proved your immaturity by following like sheep the general idea, with no intention of helping me at all.

    Thankyou for your time.

    thanks calvin, cara. at least you two managed to give advice without insulting me!


    I think u r taking it a bit too personally here mate! I for one was not insulting u...I said what u r doing is stupid. I can see that a few people have got a bit too heated at u and fair enough that u feel a bit 'got at' but people have very strong veiws on here and some like to really express them lmao. Dont take offence, we r not all arse-holes or anything like that. Its just very worrying to hear young people not taking proper precautions. I would never personally insult u over this, afterall I didnt take the right care myself not to get pregnant so I wouldnt insult u! But please take in what has been said and take more care, a baby is not a good thing to have to deal with when u r young trust me on that <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Oliy:
    okay well no one actually read what i wrote.
    i am aware of the risks, all of them
    so is my girlfriend
    so thanks for your advice (repeated how ever many times it was)
    thanks for your insults (i probably deserve most of em)
    however, it is our decision. its not like im going to blame anyone in here for any possible consequences.
    well didnt i get off to a great start here?!
    such a lovely forum <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    btw fyi i do feel bad about it and im not going to do it again until she gets the injection. again, i have told her this and we are agreed. i have to say tho that the answers posted here have basically made me more mad and determined to go out and prove you all wrong, not because of the advice in your replies but because of the insults which accompanied them.
    im not going to do that tho.
    so you see a forceful reply is much more effective than an insulting one.

    Can we wipe the slate clean? i wouldnt like to leave this forum because i do feel it could potentially help me a great deal, and i also hope that i could help some other people with their queries/problems

    Once again thanks for your time.

    O



    Ofcourse the slate can be wiped clean. I would have been a bit upset too by being told to fuck off and stuff, u dont really deserve that when u have only just joined thesite! I certainly wouldnt want u to fuck off before we get to no u <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    Im really glad that u realise its not a good idea to do it again though, coz really its just not worth it. Anyway, stick around for a while we aint all that bad honest <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/wink.gif"&gt;
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanks <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    Everyone makes mistakes
    I create disasters
    Website
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Oliy:
    thanks <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;


    U r very welcome <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/wink.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i'll remain frost with some shower in the south...u apologised, and yeah, mebbe i went a bit overboard (*amazing, i'm backing up*), so yeah. we'll see. ignore the rest of the shit i've posted, i've had a bad night and didn't get to this post until very last.

    see ya round the boards mate.

    *shudders and realises he's turning into everything he despises*

    Look into these tired eyes. See something you might recognise.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks.
    I honestly appreciate that - I think this all got a bit out of hand, and I really am a lovely newbie <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;
    O

    Everyone makes mistakes
    I create disasters
    Website
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    didnt mind you before this post. didnt insult you, inslted friends boyfriend who is a dickl stupid if you carry on, at leasst youre stopping wtih the "!rhythnm metho"....

    fiiiiine, everythings fine.

    sorruy abut the drynkness.,

    happy siting <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
    ~ the late, great Douglas Adams
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im just gonna say ur a silly boy,u may be a man,but i think ur acting like a boy.
    enuf sed.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Howdy all

    Me and my girlfriend had this problem so she went on the pill, plus we also had alot of condoms spliting on us, so it seemed that we aways was at the doctors getting the morning after pill everything is great now... Bring on the nookie.

    Nuttylad


    Sex is like a box of chocolates u never know what ur gunna get
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ok some where further up the post oily said that condoms where 2 expensive and when u get them free they only give u about 2. well im afraisd 2 say u r totally and utterly wrong,i dont think me and my bf have ever bought ne condoms, i am on the pill and everytime i go 2 get my 3months supply they give me 20, and also there is this place near me which is like where u go if u cant get a job etc etc, but also they give pregnancy tests and condoms and we go there 2 and get bout 12 so if my maths is correct that is 35 not 2! and im sure there is family planning clinics near u???

    im not preaching at u cos when me n my bf got together i wasnt on the pill and we had a few times where we did it with out 1 and he pulled out! but once he didnt pull out and we ended up having to go for the mornin after pill.

    so just wait till shes on the pill.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by NuttyLad:

    Sex is like a box of chocolates u never know what ur gunna get


    Forrest Hump
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sex is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your doing to get

    Excuse me for sounding daft or something but can anyone explain this to me?

    This is what I've narrowed it down to meaning..

    This person:

    a) Has sex wearing a blind fold
    b) Is a collector of STDs

    I, personally, always know what I'm going to get which includes what my partners look like, I know I'm going to get an orgasm and fingers-crossed no STDs...

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