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BIG mistake!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
About 3 months ago i saw a counsellor because i was really stressed, i was going through a really difficult time i was arguing with everyone and i felt i could not cope with anything. She talked to me about my dad who was always shouting at me (he put me under loads of pressure to do well and it upset me when i did not meet his goals.)
I never told anyone about the counsellor the sixth form organised it because i was really unhappy. On holiday me and my dad had an argument the usual he took my sisters side and had such a go at me. i told him for the first time how upset he made me and how i would like for him to try and be a little nicer with me, i explained how i had seen a counsellor.
He will now not forgive me, i have really upset him and i have tried explaining that i did not mean to upset him but he had upset me. he wont talk and its worse than before.the counsellor helped but he does not believe that i should be allowed to talk about him behind his back.
I really do not know what to say he never brings up the subject but my mum is also fuming she is always telling me how i have let them down and they are very angry with me. I cant win i got on with my dad after seeing the counsellor she helped so much but this is one thing that has really upset him and he will not forget it. I want to put things right but i dont know how
Please help
I never told anyone about the counsellor the sixth form organised it because i was really unhappy. On holiday me and my dad had an argument the usual he took my sisters side and had such a go at me. i told him for the first time how upset he made me and how i would like for him to try and be a little nicer with me, i explained how i had seen a counsellor.
He will now not forgive me, i have really upset him and i have tried explaining that i did not mean to upset him but he had upset me. he wont talk and its worse than before.the counsellor helped but he does not believe that i should be allowed to talk about him behind his back.
I really do not know what to say he never brings up the subject but my mum is also fuming she is always telling me how i have let them down and they are very angry with me. I cant win i got on with my dad after seeing the counsellor she helped so much but this is one thing that has really upset him and he will not forget it. I want to put things right but i dont know how
Please help
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Comments
Lets see then if they are still angry with you for going to a counsellor!
Parents are human, and as such are generally complete twats.
good luck, at the end of the day you can get your own life soon and tell them both to fuck off.
You did the best thing, got help when you needed it. Your parents may feel that they are being accused of being bad parents, something which is hard for even a bad parent to accept.
Alot of people feel getting counselling means you have been really messed up somehow, your parents may not understand why you felt the need to talk to someone outside the family unit.
I would try and talk to them about your reasons for getting the help. It doesnt sound like they are really into taking your feelings into consideration so it could be head/brick wall stuff.
Let them cool down, they are the ones with the problem here not you, maybe once they've had a bit of time they might be a bit more willing to discuss it like adults.
Good luck and I hope you find a way to make them listen.
my sister is younger i am female but that is the main problem my sister is the favored she is naughty at school never doing any work and always in trouble i am the good one. i always get told off and blamed for things. She invades my privacy by going in my room she reads my diary and takes all my things nothing is done about it.
I know i did the right thing but i just want to put it right but they never listen to my side of the story. thy think im bad.
And whenever you come home they will make a big fuss over you
I'm sure it not all bad at your home is it?
Just relax and think how good it will be when you get them all out of your hair, and!!... you always have us on here to talk to if things get too bad!
My dad said it is because in march my sister had a fit and was really ill caused by 'stress' (so my parents said) the doctor thinks she didnt have enough sleep (somenights she is up later than me)
But it has always been bad, i cant remember the last time my dad put me before my sister. it really hurts. I saw that counsellor because my boyfriend was fed up of us always fighting because i was depressed he told me to see a doctor but at the same time my teachers were thinking the exact same thing and they organised for a counsellor, i didnt slag of my dad or anything it was everyone and everything, I moaned mostly about my boyfriend but i dont see him complaining. we used to argue loads about how hes a referee and is only ever talking about that! it really annoys me. a few times i walked out on him and said i didnt like him etc. this was getting to me but now its better, I want everything to be good although it never is because when my dads alright with me my boyfriend isn't i get so stressed out with him! Thats another problem though.
As for the problem with your father, if your sister is ill in any way then it is still early days yet, it is only 6 months since your sister had her fit so as normal parents would they are neglecting you. This isnt fair on you, do you try to help your sister or do you leave it to your parents? If you try to help your sister like maybe go shopping with her or take her out sumwhere or even just with homework then you parents will see that you are taking a role in helping your sister get on with life and they will notice this. In a way its liek a form to impress but im sure your parents would be more impressed if you helped your sister rather than get good grades. Have you spoken with your parents yet? Felling so hurt only makes things worse, think positive, maybe go out with your mum and sister ona shopping spree, even if you dont have money just make the idea about going out and see wot they say. If you still havent spoken with your parents then i think you do need to and maybe involve your boyfriend in thiss too. Your boyfriend although originally wanted to hlep you , via going to see a doctor is only making things worse by also arguing with you it would be better if he sat and spoke with you about the problem and understand both sides of the story, that way you know you have someone to tlk to and who is there for support.
good luck
As with my sister she is not ill she had a fit which happened because she had late nights and didnt eat that day. she likes getting all of the atttention she hangs around with the WRONG crowd she is 12 and already tried smoking she hangs around with druggies and shes just plainly going the wrong way.
I try as hard as possible to try and turn her around make her work i never had any help with homework i have always helped my sister though, she will ofeten come out with me and my boyfriend, i take her shopping and when she is ill i will sit and read to her make drinks etc. The only real times we aregue is when she enters my room reads my diary and break my stuff. she will take my makeup clothes and CDs i have never got any of it back. i get angry and imstead of getting myself into trouble i will tell my parents who tell me to stop making a fuss and let her get on with it.
I love my sister it is not her fault and is unfair to take things out on her.
THANKS