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Self Harming Mental Health Issues and working in a school.
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
And more, much more!I need someone to talk to and have no one?!!xx
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Would you be able to tell us a little more specifically what has been going on?
This bit really stood out to me in your post. It's clear you have been and are still going through a lot and I think all of this has really clouded your self-judgement which is common.
So, coming from an outsider looking in and someone that can see reality more clearly for you, you are not dumb or stupid or pathetic and that's very clear to see from your posts around TheSite - you have lovely qualities and you have such a unique way of showing them. You know what you're talking about, you know what you want to say, it's also clear that you have so much care for others to the point where you don't want to stop being supportive until you've given absolutely everything that you can give.
You are not insane or anything similar, you are just struggling right now and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that, you obviously have a lot of reason to be finding things hard and the way you're getting through it shows sheer strength - certainly not insanity or craziness.
In terms of self harming, do you have anything in place that you could try for distraction when you feel one of those urges coming on? Or maybe there's something you could do that might give you a similar release to what you get from cutting? As an example, holding ice in place tends to be quite a common method.
Is there anything that you enjoy doing that helps on a daily basis? Do you have any friends or family members that you could lean on for laughs and/or maybe even support if you feel up to that?
How are you feeling about moving to Adult services?
I have no lovely qualities.Most on here seem to hate me and think im being rude and hurtful to people etc.I am glad you find that clear to see though as that is exactly how I feel and see it as myself.I know it is not always seen or believed but I really do care much much more about everyone else(even those i dont know),compared to myself.
I am not just struggling right now.I have been struggling for years, and I am only 17.I definitely do have reasons.Real reasons.
I have tried sooo many distractions and other coping methods but they dont really work for me much at all, which is annoying.
I dont really have anyone else to turn to.Apart from a teacher(colleague)who i work with but sheis quite busy,obviously.
I am scared, anxious and worried mainly about adult services...
Xx
Just wanted to drop in and say I know you've had a few ups and downs on here, but your kindness is really evident to myself and others. It's clear that you are often trying to do the right thing and while sometimes it might be a little misjudged, other times you are spot on.
In terms of your current position, the December move to adult services sounds like it's massively stressing you out. Has CAMHs been able to explain what kind of support you'll receive when you make the move? I've just been looking at some information on Young Minds about the move and it says that:
Has this kind of assessment happened yet? If not, do you feel able to ask about it? And If yes, how did it go?
You've also mentioned the effect that self-harm urges are having on you - is this something that you've talked about while in CAMHS recently? It might be worth bringing up as something you could benefit from some support with as you make this move?
Finally, do you feel you want to talk a little about what happened in 2012? It sounds like a particularly hard time for you. Totally understandable if not and you'd rather focus on how you can cope going forwards. Check out the Alumina online group support for options you might not have considered before: http://alumina.selfharm.co.uk/
*hug*
Thank you so much for replying.At least I do have a little care from few people.Sorry I replied late here though.i haven't had the heart to come on here lately.
It means a lot to see that you do understand in terms of how I am on the Site.I do try to be as supportive and kind to others as possible but sometimes it can be really difficult and frustrating, especially when I think of what I am going through and how I feel/am being affected by things etc.I do care MUCH more about others/everyone else(even those i dont physically know).I try hard to be there for anyone and everyone but sometimes I just need some support and to feel cared about and like I have someone to talk to and to turn to.I do want to make progress on here so I am determined to not let things get in the way of that.Hopefully anyway.
CAMHS have talked to me a bit about the transition.I hve an assessment with them at the end o december and I know who I should be working with there, unless it changes.I am worried and nervous about going to it becase of my ahe, the fact its the xmas holidays and because i wont really know what to say.
The self harming urges are often there.I havent cut in a little while though I do still use scratching and headbanging.I have tried sooo many different coping methods and other distractions.I am too scared to bring this up with CAMHS, or adult services.
2012 was a particular hard year but a lot of years have been that way for me, just for different reasons.I would love to talk about some of the things yeah but Id bore you all and no one would care much anyway
Thankyou.Hope to hear from you soon xx
Hey AngelFace,
Do feel free to talk about these things you want to talk about. Fact is we do care and we're here for you - you won't bore us and we're certainly happy to listen and try to help as much as we can, even if that is just by being here.
What exactly scares you about talking to Camhs about the urges you're struggling with?
Hope you're okay - keep us posted *hug*
It feels really hard to believe qnd accept that few people do care.I am not used to that at all, whereas a lot of people on here are used to that care and support.Im not...
A lot has happened/is happening.If I was to talk about all of it then id be here for days(im really not exaggerating either!!).Though i guess talking through one thing qt a time many help?
Have you ever asked them about this? If not, do you feel you could?
Talking through one thing at a time is certainly okay if you feel that's easier but if you do want to try and share as much as you can at once then that's honestly fine - it's whatever feels right for you.
Just wanted to drop by and send *hug*
Definitely, if chatting through one thing at a time is useful and easier for you we are here to listen. Sometimes focusing on the smaller elements that make up the bigger picture can help us to focus on what we want or need.
Share as much as you need to and we will do our best to help and support you!
I cant think straigh at the moment.I am really down and feel ever so alone.An awful lot is happening inside my mental and messed up mind
Sorry to hear you are struggling, here if you'd like to chat about anything on your mind lovely
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Have been updownupdownupdown.....
Etc etc....xx
Have you planned what you're going to mention at the assessment? It might help you to feel even a bit less nervous on the day if you go with a clear idea of how much or what exactly you might say. Try to remember that they're there to help you and if you do feel nervous or struggle to communicate with them, just tell them and explain why, I'm sure they will try to make it as easy as possible for you.
I am.I am a total messed upnperson, in manyways
Maybe they will do yeah but the thing is i have not a clue what to say and what not to say!xx
Just wanted to drop by and say that it's natural to feel nervous at an assessment - but there has been some wonderful support on here already about what you could do in order to make this feel much more comfortable for you.
If there's anything you are worrying about in the meantime, please feel free to share with us - we're here for you
Love your screen name by the way
Thank you for replying.
Yeah I guess so but still.....
Anyway, no one really does care anyway.No one at all,...
I dont believe it.Its not against you or anyone else so please dont think that, its just that no one does at all really
Have you had the assessment yet? Let us know how you're doing and what's been going on for you *hug*
Hey
Yeah, it is really hard to trust, believe or accept that people care.
I have not had the assessment yet.It is 5 days away today and is getting nearer.
A lot has happened and is happening....
X
Heya, *hug*s do you want to chat about anything? We are here for you.
" So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
'' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
Sounds like an awful lot it going on in the space of a moment AngelFace, but I'm glad you feel able to reach out to the support offered here. Would you be able to tell us a bit about what's going on? It might help breaking up issues, and focusing on them one at a time, rather than all together. I know I find focusing on everything collides all my feelings together and just seems a mess! However, I doubt your mind is the worlds mos horrible muddled up place, whats bought all this on? *hug*'s
I know you're finding lots difficult, things will fall into place soon it's going to turn out okay and you will be okay too x
you've got this!
I'll pull your ears and make you smile