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How to deal with an angry drunk?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
One of my friends always seems to get so angry and upset when she is drunk; she will be really friendly and bubbly beforehand and as soon as she has had a few drinks she'll start to accuse our friend group of talking behind her back or she will take me aside and question me about why a certain friend is ignoring her. We are a friendly and inclusive group so I am not sure why she feels this way.

I was able to brush it off the first few times but recently on nights out she has started to get like this every time I dance with a different friend or go off by myself. Initially I tried talking through it with her but she just doesn't listen. I've also tried to just walk away from it , but the next day (we live together) she just acts like nothing happened so I am unsure whether she just doesn't remember or is choosing not to confront it.

Does anyone have any experiences of resolving this kind of issue?

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes, my friend is like this ALL the time. After the first few times of it happening, we warned her before we went out that unless something happened (e.g. someone treated her badly in a club etc.) we would not be spending all our time comforting her, just putting her in a cab and sending her home (unless she's too too drunk in which case we sit her in the corner and just kind of dance around her.)

    We never mention it in the morning. Sometimes she brings it up and will apologise and we are nice about it. I know it stems from other issues which we will discuss when she's sober and I have all the time in the world for her sober crying and things.

    One thing she does do (which seems to work) is write herself a message on her hand saying something along the lines of 'your friends don't hate you. Stop crying and think about it in the morning.' When she gets in a state we tell her to read it and remind her that she wrote it herself.

    Ask her (when she's sober) why she feels that way. Try and have a sensible discussion about it and reassure her. If she feels secure in your friendship then, maybe she'll stop having to let all the insecurities bubble up when she's been drinking.
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