First Time..

Former Member

This is incredibly cringey on my behalf but..
I'm a virgin and I'm putting it down to being terrified at the thought.
'Terrified' may be a slight exaggeration, but I am really nervous.
I am probably overthinking it way to much, but I worry..
what do I do? what are they expecting from me? how should I 'look' down there?
Whenever I'm in 'that situation' with a guy, I push him away because I don't know what to expect or if I'll be doing it 'right'.
What is the 'normal' look for down there, what would you guys expect/want?

Former Member

You do what feels right for you, you do it on your terms and when you feel ready. If you like having a bush, have a bush, if you want a shaven haven go for it! There is no wrong or right, it's about what works for you. If you want to read up on it Hot Sex by Tracy Cox is very helpful. Learning what you like and then being able to tell someone else what you like and they can do likewise.

*Holly*

Hi Savannahh

It's really natural to be worried about the first-time you have sex. That's why, at the risk of sounding like a condescending parent, it's great if you do it with someone you feel really comfortable and secure with, and build up to things. You're sure to be less nervous then (although you'll still be a little) and The Right Guy won't put pressure on you to do it 'right' or 'wrong' - he'll just be chuffed and delighted.

Have you met anyone or got close to anyone you've felt really comfortable with yet?

I'm just going to post some TheSite articles which you may find helpful to read too:
Losing your virginity
Am I ready for sex?
Only virgin left in the village
Is my vagina normal?

I hope that's not too much of a bombardment of information for you!

Do let us know how you get on. And you don't have to feel cringe about asking this sort of stuff - it's what we're here for

Holly

Former Member

Hollyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

sorry to hear that ur going thew a hard time Savannahh

Former Member

I agree with all that Holly said, I did worry when I read what you said 'whenever I'm in that situation with a guy' it makes it sound like you may have sex with someone not so special and I think you sound lovely and are worrying about something loads of girls do.

Please respect yourselve is what I want to say, wait for someone special, I was 21 when I lost my v and I married that man and am still with him now 7 years later and only want him all my life, not that this is what you should do, some girls like to sleep with loads of boys and love it but to me that makes me feel ill.

you may not stay with the same person all your life but respect yourself and don't sleep with someone who does not respect you.

boys are just as worried about it, erections and penis size etc you are not alone.

Don't feel you have to just because you are a certain age.