Staying Sane

Former Member

I recently made one of the first big practical positive life changes I have ever done. I left the job that was making me unwell, and moved back to my mum and dads for a bit of rest. I feel pretty good about this, but there are two things prodding me a bit.

1. Since this is the first positive life change, its a new feeling so I keep second guessing my decision and doubting myself, because previously I wouldn't have made such a decision. Any tips on overcoming this? Still seeing my therapist regularly so have that support its more the whole choosing a different path and ignoring the dark thoughts.

2. Other people and their two cents worth. Most people are obsessed with what I am going to do next. Whilst I am glad for a break and time to re-assess, the constant prodding is again weakening me slightly. I feel very mentally drained. Any tips on getting people to just back off?

Former Member

Hi Girl_Gunner

It's great that you recognise what a positive decision you've made. Try to remember what a hard decision it was when you're doubting yourself and think about how you'd be feeling now - and what position you'd be in now if you hadn't. This might help you kick those negative thoughts away.

Saying that, most of us question big life changes, even when we know deep down that they are right. It's human nature to wonder what might have happened down other paths, and there's nothing wrong with that, as long as you don't wallow in it too much. Maybe writing a list of all the benefits of making the change would help - you could get it out when you're having doubts?

As for the others - are they close friends and family? If so, have you spoken to them about why you made the changes and how much it has helped you? Sometimes people say things out of ignorance and don't realise how much it's affecting you. They might even think they are helping you think about your future!

If they aren't people you're particularly close to and you don't want to talk to them about your private life then maybe it's simply a case of creating a bit of space from them while you take some time to yourself?

Spanner

Former Member

Thanks Spanner

The list of benefits idea sounds like a really good one. I can make a big one and stick it on my wall where I can see it all the time. Sometimes things are esaier to conquer when the black and white is in front of you.

Well its a mix of people really, some people I think its just because they would never just "take a break" the way I have so it scares them a little. I think the space idea is a good one also, even just saying I need some space and I appreciate the advice but not right now