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I love him...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Basically, there's this guy in my year(I'm 13) and I really like him(for about3 months) but he likes my best friend. I didn't think it was that obvious that I liked him but the day that he asked my best friend out and she said no, I told her that I really like him. She said she knew! So like 1 month ago(roughly) I told him that I liked him and he was fine with it. We are still best friends and stuff but some of his friends and other people where messing around that week and where playing truth or dare. They where daring me and him stuff then they asked him whether he loved me back. By that time it was really awkk anyway. He said that he did, but as a best friend. The thing is, is that recently its still really obvious that he likes my best friend but has suddenly got really flirty with me. I'm not sure whether he's just being nice or he could like me back. I seriously like him...
(Sorry for babbling but its really important)
Please don't leave stupid comments like'god your 13' and stuff

Comments

  • ReenaReena Posts: 1,375 Wise Owl
    Hey love can happen at any age. But you're still young enough, so take your time.
    From what I know of 13 year old boys they tend to follow their hormones. And all young lads tend to flirt, and not admit their feelings in public.
    If he does like your friend it's best to give him some time to get over those feelings, then who knows?
    Don't know if that helped. Love is a battle field. xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lostangel wrote: »
    Please don't leave stupid comments like'god your 13' and stuff

    I'm not going to say anything like god your 13, just that you are young and still have a lot of life ahead of you. At 13 you will still be developing as a person and getting used to your feelings.

    You mention in the title that you love him, but in your post you say that you really like him? All I'm going to say is that it sounds as if your friend turned him down because she said she knew you liked him. Add to the fact that you could have been his second choice, you just have to be careful and make sure its what you really want before trying to pursue a relationship with him. It could end up hurting you.

    I didn't intend to come across as mean when I talked about you still developing as a person, but its difficult if someone asks a question wanting advice, but specifies what advice they don't want to hear.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    G-Raffe wrote: »
    I'm not going to say anything like god your 13, just that you are young and still have a lot of life ahead of you. At 13 you will still be developing as a person and getting used to your feelings.

    You mention in the title that you love him, but in your post you say that you really like him? All I'm going to say is that it sounds as if your friend turned him down because she said she knew you liked him. Add to the fact that you could have been his second choice, you just have to be careful and make sure its what you really want before trying to pursue a relationship with him. It could end up hurting you.

    I didn't intend to come across as mean when I talked about you still developing as a person, but its difficult if someone asks a question wanting advice, but specifies what advice they don't want to hear.

    I understand what you are saying about the don't want to hear it thing but I've just had enough of people thinking that because I'm 13 then I don't know my feelings because I don't have any experience in love. Well to be honest I don't because I'm not one of those girls that ll the boys like because she's 'fit' or will let them do 'anything'. To be honest I'm a misfit. Always have been always will be. But that doesn't mean I don't try to fit in' it means that I get judged for doing/saying things that all the popular people would be accepted for. I do have a few friends and we definitely have our fair share of problems but we get over them. I can't take bein told that I'm immature or inexperienced because if you have seen what I've been through and what I've till got to come then you would be damn lucky your not in my shoes. (By the way this isn't aimed at you just wanted to make this clear)
    I told my friend that I like the guy that asked her out in the same lesson that he asked her out but afterwards. She would never say no because I liked him. Not because she's a bad friend by because she knows that wouldn't mind. If my friends and family are happy, that all that matters to me. I don't mind if I miss out because at the end of the day it's better to have the friends you want and togive them the bonus' because eventually you will get the Benicia of them knowing everything about you and them always being here to help you. Everyone wins in the long run, you've just got to be patient.
    Last night the other boy who I was talkin to in bbm(he had a gf but found her really stressy) he wanted to break up with his gf and wanted me to help him. So I gave him some advice and told him that he had t be nice and apologetic, whatever she said. So he broke up with her and I was like'so what you goin to do now?' And he said that there is this girl in ashtead who likes him but he doesn't really know her. So I said okay well don't do anything about her, just enjoy single life whilst you can and find that lucky girl that you love and she lives you back when your ready. So we got talking (hes 12 and I'm 13 , he's year 8 I'm year9) and he was really nice and funny and I felt like I could tell anything. Then he was asking me all these questions. He said that he knows he's found the girl that he's been looking for his whole life but doesn't know if she feels the same way. So I told him to ask her out, not thinking anything of it. Then he asks me out and I had to say no because I don't know what I'm feeling like right now. He asked me whether I like liked him and so I said that I really liked how he made me laugh and could tell him anything. And then he asked me whether loved him but I told him that I couldn't have this conversation and apologised. I think that I really like him but now whenever I try to talk to him on bbm it comes up with a Red Cross because it can't deliver to him. I really want to speak to him but I can't. Also is it possible that I can like 2 guys at once????
  • ReenaReena Posts: 1,375 Wise Owl
    It is possible to like 2 people at the same time, but you need to think which you like more. This can take some time to figure out.
    Have you tried making a list? You could say boy A and boy B with a line down the middle, then write down all the things you like about them. It may help you work out just how much you like them, of course it might not help at all. xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're 13...
    But anyway, pick the second guy. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't of liked the second.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah, I am 13. Is that hard to understand because of what I wrote? But the second guy is younger and I have known him for years but never really spoken to him. Also I think I considerably confused at the moment about my feelings so j may not actually like the second guy, I might just like the fact that he's there for me. I'm really ill as well because I don't sleep because I can't get the first guy out of my head. It's made me so ill that I'm sick a few times a day but I don't do anything about it, I only tell my best friend( the bone who the first guy asked out) and she understands that noone else can know. My other best friend also found out I'm ill because I couldn't concentrate and she caught me being sick in the toilets at school. They are the only 2 who know. My mum doesn't even know. The most sleep that u get in 5 hours. I've tried everything I can to get to sleep but nothing works
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lostangel wrote: »
    Yeah, I am 13. Is that hard to understand because of what I wrote? But the second guy is younger and I have known him for years but never really spoken to him. Also I think I considerably confused at the moment about my feelings so j may not actually like the second guy, I might just like the fact that he's there for me. I'm really ill as well because I don't sleep because I can't get the first guy out of my head. It's made me so ill that I'm sick a few times a day but I don't do anything about it, I only tell my best friend( the bone who the first guy asked out) and she understands that noone else can know. My other best friend also found out I'm ill because I couldn't concentrate and she caught me being sick in the toilets at school. They are the only 2 who know. My mum doesn't even know. The most sleep that u get in 5 hours. I've tried everything I can to get to sleep but nothing works

    How can you know about "love", before learning paragraphs? And i meant "you're 13" as in, you're only thirteen, you should be climbing trees not guys dicks.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh I'm sorry shikari, I didn't realise this was an English lesson I just thought it was somewhere anybody could come and talk WITHOUT bein judged for any reason. Where tey could come and get some advice
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Shikari wrote: »
    You're 13...
    But anyway, pick the second guy. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't of liked the second.

    Bullshit.

    Too tired to go into it but this is crap.

    Incidentally, I wouldn't go calling anyone out on their formatting/use of English if I were you. Pot. Kettle. Black.
  • **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    lostangel wrote: »
    Oh I'm sorry shikari, I didn't realise this was an English lesson I just thought it was somewhere anybody could come and talk WITHOUT bein judged for any reason. Where tey could come and get some advice

    Too right it is my dear :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi there lostangel,

    It seems like these two boys have created a big confusion for you. It's normal to be unsure about your feelings and it's not because the second boy admits his feelings for you that you have to respond right away - you have the right to think about what you want!

    Maybe you like this second boy only because he is there for you - and maybe you like the first boy for different reasons - and that's ok. Sometimes we have different reasons for liking different people, and doesn't mean they are right or wrong.

    Have a look at our article on Falling for a friend and Unrequited love which could help *hug*.

    Try to remember there is no hurry for you to decide which one you want yet, if either, so take your time :)

    Do let us know how you get on - and yes this is a place to share and not judge as Helen confirmed :yes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    christele wrote: »
    Hi there lostangel,

    It seems like these two boys have created a big confusion for you. It's normal to be unsure about your feelings and it's not because the second boy admits his feelings for you that you have to respond right away - you have the right to think about what you want!

    Maybe you like this second boy only because he is there for you - and maybe you like the first boy for different reasons - and that's ok. Sometimes we have different reasons for liking different people, and doesn't mean they are right or wrong.

    Have a look at our article on Falling for a friend and Unrequited love which could help *hug*.

    Try to remember there is no hurry for you to decide which one you want yet, if either, so take your time :)

    Do let us know how you get on - and yes this is a place to share and not judge as Helen confirmed :yes:
    Thankyou. The thing is guy a doesn't like me back and j know it. If I did end up liking him then there would be no point. Also guy b has deleted me off bbm so I have no contact with him but I really need to speak to him
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When I was 13/14 (which seems like a long time ago now, so I hope what i have to say makes some sense to you) I was MADLY infatuated (not in love, but it felt like it) with a guy called Luis. I would spend my every waking moment trying to talk to him and working out how he felt and trying to figure it all out. I wasted so so so much of my time, at an age when I could have been so much more productive practicing my music and making things or hanging out with friends and just letting things happen.

    Just letting things happen seems very hard. I know its hard because i have "tried" to let things happen for many years - I think the trying part is kind of going against the principle, but I hope you get my drift. But it wasn't until I fell in love with the most unlikely of people that I realised that just seeing how things go is sooooo much easier and is less heartbreaking. We didn't stay together forever - in fact we only lasted 2 and 1/2 years, but I learnt that you can't force matters of the heart.

    Just let go of it all, go out have fun with your friends and just let things happen. Its the easiest way :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hugely agreeing with Miss Riot here.
    You can't force feelings on either side, and often the best things come to those who wait. Live your life, be happy and have fun first, be relaxed about it. If love happens then great, if not right now then great too because relationships can be testing! I remember what it's like to be your age and confused, I think it's more confusing because you're just starting to have real feelings for boys and its all new. I don't mean that in a patronising way, just sympathising with you because I think feelings are more tough when you're younger. In a way, anyway. But really, don't put your life on hold over these two, if either are interested let them come to you. Relationships can be tough, I'm married so I know lol! Don't get me wrong, it's great being in love and having that fun and also the security, but sounds to me like you're unsure of your feelings and if you tried to pursue either I'd worry that someone may get hurt. Better to just be you, give it time and be sure of who you want before doing anything. Besides which, they may like the attention you're giving them. Which is why I say let them come to you. That way you'll know who genuinely likes you and who's just getting a big head ;) let them do the running.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you guys
  • ReenaReena Posts: 1,375 Wise Owl
    Your welcome hun. xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Read my new post please
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