Can't get him outta my head

Former Member

I know in my last post all I could talk about was the , you know the one I met in the club well due 2 recent events I have just found out that he and the other guys I've been obssessing over have just been things 2 take my mind off the real prob'
This being my x the guy I broke up with 5 months ago, he realy hurt me and I through all the usual emotions hurt, anger and now it seems I'm going through regret I miss him and all the flirting and 1 nite stands in the world won't stop me thinking about him.
He's got a lot of baggage and some v.serious probs which he's not facing, and he's loosing all his friends, but I know deep down that he really isn't that horrible and mean.
Let me explain: He & I met through a mutual friend & we hit it off, he asked 2 c me again & I did, we'd meet regular & hetold me bits of his history which isn't pretty, let's just say violence dominated some of his previous relationships, he's a v.complex guy and he can b v.sweet, at first he was great with me but then he started 2 say cruel things & then out of nowhere he dumped me. Details: He dumped me at 4 O'clock in the am in my bed & then the next day I was so shocked that I just didn't say anything (I did drop kick his MD player while he was in the loo) but I never really confronted him about it.
Now he's rude & cruel 2 every one close 2 him including me, he won't speak 2 me & has been acting like it was me who did the dirty on him ever since we broke up.
My prob is that I still love him but I don't like him & I think that I let him down, I feel like I'm just another person who gave up on him just when he needed me most, I feel like I've failed him some how. I really really love him. What should I do? He's got no one 2 turn 2 & I think I should b there 4 him. what do I do?

Former Member

A tricky situation... But you have got a heart of gold, of what I can see out of the post.

I guess, that if you start confronting him spot on, he will be scared away... But phonecalls once in a while, and stuff like that will make him aware of the fact that you are there and care and thinking about him.
Then it is his choice weather he would take the offer, or not...

Good luck

Former Member

Thanks 4 the advice it's great but I really love him and would like 2 get back with him do U think this is a good idea? and how do I get him back???????

Former Member

I will refrain myself from bursting into song! Kylie rocks Good luck with that guy I have no advice, just wanna look at pretty colours Rock on

Former Member

Lol, am so inexperienced with the whole relationship thing... Usually I just run away before anything serious starts. So it's quite funny seeing you ask for advice.
Though I guess it always clearer looking in, from the outside in these kinds of matters...

I don't know if it such a great an idea to get back with him at the moment. But I guess that you'll just have to go with the flow. In the sense, that you only bring up the subject about begoming a pair again, after things have settled down a bit. When it's a bit more clear and when you have him cooled down.

Former Member

Thanks 4 the advice again, First I have 2 make him c I'm there 4 him as a friend. Rum hugs & vodka kisses the one & only Darkeyes, by the way U rock

Former Member

Please, do not entertain dreams of getting back together with this guy because you will only draw out the pain of losing him. No matter how much you love him, the sooner you let go (and that doesn't mean getting him completely out of your life), the sooner you will begin to heal and have hopes and dreams for a life without him.

Don't feel like a failure. You have done all that you can. If he doesn't want to see or can't see that he is loved, there is nothing you can do about it. He has to open his eyes and he has to learn for himself that he is a worthwhile person before he can believe that anyone else cares for him.

Keep in touch once in a while, like Jacq suggested. That way you will still be involved in his life and if and when he is ready to open up and ask for help or for support, you will be there. But don't feel that it is your problem or that you have to instigate his opening up.

Best of luck.
xx

Former Member

it sucks still liking an ex dont it?

i can see you have deep feelings for him and stuff but the best thing you can do is just to move on. getting involved only opens yourself up to more hurt....you dont need that