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so how exactly do I deal with grandma on day to day basis?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
(horrible grammar)
So I just don't even want to care about my family really. Possibly my dad but other then that no one. I don't even have respect for my grandma anymore. I've been passive aggressive with acknowledging she exists and getting stuff done if she needs it. I don't love my grandma. So guilt tripping isn't gonna work. I am thankful I get to live here but not enough to love her. I don't like her. I will never tell her about my personal life if possible since she likely is just going to bitch. I don't respect manipulative people who emotionally hurt others. Who blame others for things they aren't even at fault for. Especially when she talks down on her daughter who is technically slowly dieing. Does anyone know of any meditation or ways to deal with the situation? I would rather use as little money as possible. I do plan on moving out eventually but I have things I need done first. So for now I am stuck.
note (well really more of a rant): We have talked a bit. She uses the well what if you were me...That is not how one wins a debate, argument, doesn't work in the professional workforce...That is how parents teach their very young children not how adults speak to each other. She asked what if you were stuck in a house all of the time. I told her I already have been there and I solved my own problems. Get out there and meet the world. She can't drive. Okay I told her I could drive her to a club or church. She refuses. Her loss. I later find out she ate dinner with someone. Ok so she really doesn't need me. Stop being controlling. I don't cling to someone because I thought they were obligated to me. The reality of life is people choose to be with other people. If they need to be with someone sure they likely will choose to. I chose to live here on the terms I was simply her driver. Not her friend, someone to cling to, etc. I didn't grow up around her really. I am used to paying my own way for mostly everything. Dad helps with other stuff. It doesn't matter if we are blood related. I don't know her 100% and what I do know of her we don't get along. We are two different people, really. With that logic of clinging to people I should love all of humanity. But that is not how I am. For one I refuse to love people who kill others for fun. I am not a saint as found from religion. I hate being identified as good or bad. If I had an alignment I would be lawful good or chaotic good. She has such childish logic sometimes and so much ignorance I can deal with that. Being over controlling. I seriously don't care anymore. To the point when we were at my grandpa's funeral when she started talking negatively about me. I replied back that I can't stand seeing her being mean to her daughter who is tech dieing. Also other things. Gah. She even told my parents I am a liar. They know full well if I do lie I start to cry. She seriously will not have my respect. I also highly doubt she trusts me since she can't control me. When I told her I was moving out she thinks she is the reason. My life is not all about her damn! I don't like the colleges around where I live. It makes more since to work near my college as well. She keeps wanting me to stay close to her. I didn't move simply to become close to her. She needs to take care of those needs with someone else because I won't be fulfilling those needs. I am here to get what I need done then leave eventually. Eh she is in her 80's so she might die before I move out. Which is still okay. I don't look up to her. If I become like her I would be disgusted.
So I just don't even want to care about my family really. Possibly my dad but other then that no one. I don't even have respect for my grandma anymore. I've been passive aggressive with acknowledging she exists and getting stuff done if she needs it. I don't love my grandma. So guilt tripping isn't gonna work. I am thankful I get to live here but not enough to love her. I don't like her. I will never tell her about my personal life if possible since she likely is just going to bitch. I don't respect manipulative people who emotionally hurt others. Who blame others for things they aren't even at fault for. Especially when she talks down on her daughter who is technically slowly dieing. Does anyone know of any meditation or ways to deal with the situation? I would rather use as little money as possible. I do plan on moving out eventually but I have things I need done first. So for now I am stuck.
note (well really more of a rant): We have talked a bit. She uses the well what if you were me...That is not how one wins a debate, argument, doesn't work in the professional workforce...That is how parents teach their very young children not how adults speak to each other. She asked what if you were stuck in a house all of the time. I told her I already have been there and I solved my own problems. Get out there and meet the world. She can't drive. Okay I told her I could drive her to a club or church. She refuses. Her loss. I later find out she ate dinner with someone. Ok so she really doesn't need me. Stop being controlling. I don't cling to someone because I thought they were obligated to me. The reality of life is people choose to be with other people. If they need to be with someone sure they likely will choose to. I chose to live here on the terms I was simply her driver. Not her friend, someone to cling to, etc. I didn't grow up around her really. I am used to paying my own way for mostly everything. Dad helps with other stuff. It doesn't matter if we are blood related. I don't know her 100% and what I do know of her we don't get along. We are two different people, really. With that logic of clinging to people I should love all of humanity. But that is not how I am. For one I refuse to love people who kill others for fun. I am not a saint as found from religion. I hate being identified as good or bad. If I had an alignment I would be lawful good or chaotic good. She has such childish logic sometimes and so much ignorance I can deal with that. Being over controlling. I seriously don't care anymore. To the point when we were at my grandpa's funeral when she started talking negatively about me. I replied back that I can't stand seeing her being mean to her daughter who is tech dieing. Also other things. Gah. She even told my parents I am a liar. They know full well if I do lie I start to cry. She seriously will not have my respect. I also highly doubt she trusts me since she can't control me. When I told her I was moving out she thinks she is the reason. My life is not all about her damn! I don't like the colleges around where I live. It makes more since to work near my college as well. She keeps wanting me to stay close to her. I didn't move simply to become close to her. She needs to take care of those needs with someone else because I won't be fulfilling those needs. I am here to get what I need done then leave eventually. Eh she is in her 80's so she might die before I move out. Which is still okay. I don't look up to her. If I become like her I would be disgusted.
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