Home Sex & Relationships
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

still a virgin

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
hi everyone in karti and im 20 years old,
me and my boyfriend decide to have sex but sadly its really hurt me so much... even he try to make wetter but when he try to enter me i feel very pain and i think i can take it.
till now i don't wanna make love with him (he still didn't enter me yet). will it become a problem for our relation..
and any advice so i can stand the pain

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    this is normal.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Are you quite nervous? Does he have a big penis?

    I found it painful, being entered my first time... But being relaxed and being wet really helps.

    You can still make love to him in other ways.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi there karti,

    Welcome to the boards :wave:

    It’s quite common for sex to be slightly painful/uncomfortable the first time and well done for talking about it. Have a look at this answer from Askthesite that is quite similar and can help.

    You say you have been using lubrication, which is good. It’s also important to take time with foreplay as well as being ready and having a good trusting relationship with your partner in order to be as relaxed as you can. Our article on painful sex mentions this:
    There could be many reasons why sex is uncomfortable. An unstretched hymen can cause pain the first few times, but in every case it's important to be relaxed and aroused, and for the vagina to be sufficiently lubricated before penetration. The trick is to take time getting intimate with your partner, just kissing, touching and caressing. Aim to make sex an extension of this foreplay, rather than an act in its own right, and things should go more smoothly.

    Please also remember also to practise safe sex, as even though you may not be having full intercourse, it's important to use protection.

    Feel free to keep posting and let us know how you are getting on :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you keep trying an its incredibly painful then go to the GP. But just make sure you are really relaxed and maybe try a position where you are in control of how much he enters you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Don't worry, seriously the more you worry the more it'll hurt etc.
    The main thing you need to think about is do YOU reaaaalllly feel ready; I lost my virginity quite young, I wasn't ready, heck I even knew I wasn't but because of pressure and thinking I wasn't 'normal' I went along with it.

    The first time always hurts - I'm sorry but it does; when I first had 1 finger inserted in me it pained like nothing I ever felt before - and a finger is quite small - if your serious about making love to your boyfriend you need to work at it, gradually increasing more foreplay - once your fully comfortable with 2 fingers then move onto having sex - but slowly - make sure its with a condom [ not just to be safe ] but it helps in terms of lubrication AND if he has a common lesser known problem like 'phimosis' it might be hard for him to get it into you without one.

    Hope this helps - please don't worry about this too much, take your time
Sign In or Register to comment.