Confidence please? :')

Former Member

Its been about 2 months since I separated with my last partner, I was stupid enough to sacrifice everything from education to friends to be with her, I moved in with her which was about an hour and a half from my where I used to live on a train, well I took the role of being a daddy to her child, got a job, I went to stay with my mum for a week, an kinda found out she was shagging someone else. Lost everything I own...including my dignity :')

But my situation now, I cant even talk to women any more, because am terrified its going to happen again, an am scared of even just going out on a night out and pulling a random girl, I don't have a fucking clue what is wrong with my right now, I used to be like Casanova, never stopped, always had a girl around my waist, sounds big headed yeah? But it was true, my life is messed up right now, an all I want is some one, just one person to at least sit through this with me, its not the same with friends or family, I just need a little bit of advice on what I can to help myself at the moment? I just feel like I have lost all confidence

Thanks for listening to me (Y)

But if anything am more curious to here what you people have to say and your experiences if similar obviously

:thumb:

Former Member

What is it that you're scared of? Did you have a close bond to the child, do you miss the child - is that part of the fear?

Former Member

yeahh I did, considered her my own an I don't entirely know what am scared of, I think its commitment and how easily things can go wrong, but even just being in a bar trying to pull someone, I don't know why but I physically cant bring myself to talk to girls properly any more, I have tried dating sites, my friends trying to set me up, an I just freeze, feel like I have lost all confidence in myself, an trust in women, this isn't the first times something like this has happened to me, but I think this has been the most severe case

Former Member

I think you just need a break from women, relationships, even trying to pull for a one night stand. Just put all of it to one side for a while until you're completely over this break up cos i dont think you are yet

Former Member

Lexi99 wrote: »

I think you just need a break from women, relationships, even trying to pull for a one night stand. Just put all of it to one side for a while until you're completely over this break up cos i dont think you are yet

This. When you put alot into a relationship it can be hard after to adjust and find out who you are after the experience. You need some time to work out what you have learned from it and what you have gained. Each relationship makes you a slightly different person through the experience. Just take some time to get to know yourself again before you try and force yourself onto a dating scene you are not quite ready for yet.

Former Member

Thank you, I suppose your all right, I do need a break from this all, an just need to sort myself out, just feel like I have ran before I could walk :') an I suppose I just need to find a permanent home and stable income before I take a jump like this again, but I don't know I just feel really alone >.< I think that's what am scared of right now, I have great friends, and my mum has been so supportive of me I can't thank her enough, but I suppose everyone has a reaction like this after a break up

Thank you so much though.