Am I being paranoid or is she in the wrong? :/

Former Member

I've recently got a new girlfriend after seeing her for a month or 2, and we've been together for a few weeks now and everything's been going really well! Until last night.

We'd arranged that I would take her out for something to eat, and a trip to the cinema, followed by a few drinks back at mine, which I thought was really romantic on my behalf and I made a lot of effort for this. However, when she got to my house 20 mins early, all dressed up for going out, showing a bit of cleavage as she has very big breasts and I asked her to sit with a couple of my mates downstairs as I get ready upstairs. I made all the effort, dressed so smartly and done myself up, not to mention looking forward to it loads.

I got downstairs and said we ready to go, and they were already drinking vodka and listening to music and she looked to be enjoying herself. She then said to me, 'oh can we give it a miss tonight we'll just stay here and have a laugh it's cheaper and that', giggling away with my mates but they said they'd go when she came so i'm a bit pissed off at this. Anyway they were all chatting away and I was quite p*ssed off at this point so I thought i'd call it an early night and told her to come join me when she's ready.

I woke up the morning she wasn't next to me in my bed, she was downstairs on my sofa, with her exposed legs showing with just a bra and sexy knickers on, my mate on the floor with no top on and another mate with just his boxers on on the sofa, all asleep with empty booze round my living room.

I immidiately ousted the mates out and told them i'd see them later, putting a brave face on, and she seemed awfully quiet. She's now in my bathroom and it's killing me this is.

Am I just being too paranoid or what I'm gonna have to ask her to go for today I can't take this. But she's from over an hour away so I can't. Ahh i'm stuck. Advise please

Former Member

I don't think you're being paranoid, no. Well, it's not paranoia that you're feeling utterly pissed off anyway. It's a night that you had planned out carefully that was wrecked by a total lack of consideration on the part of your 'friends' and this girl. You have every right to be pissed off.

I question why you even had these so called friends around your place at all when you knew she was going to be coming round, but then she was 20mins early so that might be a factor. However, you should have shown them the door when she got there if not very soon afterwards. If they'd had any decency they'd have left anyway.

My gut instinct is that she took a shine to one of them and that is what motivated her to want to stay. She sounds like a 'good time girl' to me, and I'm not casting aspersions on her willingness to sleep with people. What I mean is that she's more interested in having a laugh and pleasing herself than pleasing anybody else or even considering the feelings of anybody else, i.e. selfish.

The state that you found them all in the next morning would have made anyone suspicious, not to mention pissed off even further that she'd shunned you the whole night in favour of hanging around with people she doesn't even know.

My advice, in a nutshell, is to write this girl off as a decent relationship prospect and to find yourself better mates. I wouldn't want any of these people in my house again to be honest.

Former Member

I think you're not suited to each other. If you had wanted to go out, you could have kicked your mates out. Going back up to your room suggests you were sulking- why would any girl go and join someone sulking. I think you'd suit someone meeker, whose clothes you could chose and movements you could plan etc.

Former Member

no youre not paranoid. She blatantly fucked your mates. Although it doesnt sound like you were much company just going to bed in a huff, not that thats any excuse, but your mates arent really your mates, and the girl is a bit of a slapper so id move on tbh

Former Member

SuzyCreamcheese wrote: »

no youre not paranoid. She blatantly fucked your mates. Although it doesnt sound like you were much company just going to bed in a huff, not that thats any excuse, but your mates arent really your mates, and the girl is a bit of a slapper so id move on tbh

Agreed. If you arrange a date and your missus decides to stay in and get pissed with your mates and get naked with them, it's normally a sign that things aren't good......