Councelling or give up?

Former Member

Hey guys,
My teacher is saying that i should have family councelling, involving my parents which scares the hell outta me cos they will find out and ill be accused of shit stirring or bitching about them. and they will deny pretty much everything.
Or i could do individual councelling just for me and then possibly group councelling, but right now it can not go to that. just individual. Is it possible for me to have councelling with out my parents knowing as im under 16? only by less than a month tho.
the only other option is that i give up and go my own way away from my family and dont let it affect me anymore. i cant leave my family. i cant just forget about them.
I guess im writing for some advice? if youve got any id apprietiate it. xx

Former Member

counselling by yourself is probably the most likely option. Teachers wont really tell you to have fAmily counselling...it was probably more of a suggestion than anything else.

Former Member

you know how i hought it would be with mine.
aparently my mum turned around and admitted theres a problem.,

things may turn around... but it took me giving up after 3 years of fighting.

it may seems really ocnfusing, but it will come to you , x

Former Member

My dad will not say there is a problem he just won't. Im scared my parents will find out about it. If it was certian it was confidential then I would do councelling..

Former Member

my mum said the same.
she still hasnt admitted to me she knows theres a problem.. x

after your 16 im fairly sure it can be kept confidential, but dont trust that x

Former Member

Yes it will be kept confidential in almost every instance.

If there is a threat of severe harm to self or others they would have to disclose but will almost always disclose to someone else in the team and discuss it with you before telling anyone else.

Does that make sense?

I refused family therapy in the past, I just couldn't face it. Start out on your own and see how you get on, you can always move to family therapy later.

Former Member

its really good that your trying to get help i would say definatly go solo councelling fist, because you have to get yourself to a position where you know the issues and feel you can confidently address them with your family. Doing this in your own time rather than bringing them in now when you may not be able to properly explain yourself is a much better idea.

As someone else has said, councelling services are legally confidential unless you are in danger of immediate severe harm to yourself/others. This wouldnt be self harm, or suicidal feelingsbut for instance if you told them you were definatley going to kill yourself etc.

There are many services geared towards young people which you should be able to do without parents consent. You could go to your family doctor and ask them what is avaliable in your area? I know in my area in the UK there is a service as part of the 'mind' organization which is geared toward young people, they do group sessions and one to one and i found going there really brilliant (especially cuz around ages of 16 your too old for kids services and too young for adult so finding a teen service is best geared towards your needs.)

If in doubt about confidentiality, ask before you speak there is always childline / samaritans etc who you can call without it showing on your phone bill

good luck
xx