If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
I Give Up!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I can't cope anymore. I've lived for years without any form of emotional support. There's just too much for me to deal with now. I've seen too much. My mum is having a nervous break down and all I can do is watch it happen. She was unfairly sacked from her job and that ontop of everything else has drove her crazy. She's in her 40's but she's like an old woman. Her hands shake all the time. I'm now considered her next of kin and responsible for her wellbeing. I can't cope. I'm binge drinking at weekends and I've just started on the aspirin again. Last time I was like this I got cockier and cockier till i took 38 n collapsed at work. If I end up back in hospital i'd lose my job and I can guarentee my mum would too but this time I dont think she'd ever get out. It's soul destroying. My girlfriend is now my ex, and it hurts cos i love her still so much. I've fooled myself into trying to forget her but how can I? She meant the world to me. My childhood home is being sold, the drawing of my old bedroom window won't be mine to view no more. I haven't looked at my father for 6 months and he doesnt give a shit about me nor anyone else for that matter. I feel so totally isolated. I rebuild my life again and again and it gets knocked down everytime. The way I am at the minute, I aint gonna keep my job. I love the work and I work my work mates but Im like a volcano and the magma is pressing under my weaknesses and it's gonna explode sooner or later. I need support but as usual i'm left to carry the whole world on my shoulders. One day this aspirin's gonna catch up and my liver will fail and I'll just be another cabbage attached to a life support machine till someone flicks the switch and thats that, its over!
________
Lovely Wendie
________
Lovely Wendie
0
Comments
I hope you and your mum are ok and get the help you need. it cant be easy to have all this burden on you. stop taking all the aspirin as it will ruin your gut long before it kills you.
Chin up, and well done for being there for your mum. i know its not easy but youll cope and youll be a stronger person for it.:)
if i go for councelling i might lose my job. im on a 12 month probation so if i make a single mistake they can dismiss me. I can't handle my mam. It hurts me too much to see her like this. I need a female influence in my life but my mums lost it n my girlfriend's cut me out too. I really don't understand her cos she still talks about good things we've done n admits that there was never a bad memory when we were together.
As for the aspirin, Its history repeating. Last time I started like this taking it in small doses, only 12 at a time but then i doubled it n ended up in hospital fighting for every breathe. I dont want that to happen cos it'd kill my mam, literally but im totally outta control when i aint workin n accidents happen!
________
FERRARI 575M MARANELLO
theres no way i can afford to be sick n itd ruin everything cos itd hurt my mam even more n im fine at work. work is the 1 thing keepin me goin. I can cope with work pressure, just not all this emotional shit on top of it. Docs just try to bunk u off on some form of antidepressant but thats never gonna be the right answer for me. For a start, u put me on ne drug n i wont take it, I'll just build up stock then o'd on it. The docs have put mum on a new sleeping tablet n they're supposed to be watching her but at the end of the day, its me she relies upon. Im more like her husband than her son. Im listed as her next of kin n Im gonna have to get a 2 bed room house to accomodate her if need be. No one else gives a toss but i've got my own problems. If she knew her son was drinkin so much n takin so much aspirin she'd have a heart attack. My family is totally fucked cos of one sick bastard, my dad but he aint suffering the consequences, i am and we are. Community mental health teams dont address the issue. All theyre concerned about is whether sum1s gonna kill themselves. If ure not high risk, its a token effort n if u r high risk they just lock u up n it solves nothin
________
SYNTHETIC WEED
my job is a high pressure atmosphere. On our application form we had to put down if we were havin ne counsellin. Ironically enough work have a counsellin thing with the wellfare system but if they think we cant cope with the work pressures, theyd have no problem getting rid of us n i know theyd think that n theyd watch me like a hawk n sack me if i did nethin wrong
________
Lamborghini Islero Specifications
You need to talk this all through with someone and put everything into perspective, if you seek counselling through your doctor it will be completely confidential and your work doesn't have to know, you can have it outside of work hours, which will mean you don't have to explain any absences either. Go to your GP and explain exactly how you are feeling. If you can't explain out loud, write it down, or print off this thread and present it to him/ her.
Even if you feel like you can barely do anything to make things better, try reaching out to one other human being. Try not to isolate yourself. Tell one person you trust. It could be a family member, someone at work or college, or a friend.
If you find it hard talking face-to-face about your feelings without feeling ashamed or embarrassed, call a confidential helpline like the Samaritans as a starting point. They take a call every 12 seconds, and have years of experience dealing with all kinds of people in crisis. Samaritans: 0345 909090.
Useful article on counselling here
You also need to take some time out for yourself from work and your family stuff. Is there a friend or neighbour who can keep aneye on your mum for a few days while you take a break? Why don't you go crash at a mates and unwind (without binging on drink).
looking after yourself
Hope that helps
Susie