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Going to uni but gf isn't

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Hi,

I'm 19 and have been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years. This Sunday I'm off to Nottingham University but my girlfriend is having a gap year and so is staying at home.

I really want to stay with her and make things work but I understand it will be difficult. I will only be 55 mins away on the train so am planning on coming back most weekends; this isn't just because of her but also because I have sailing training at home and a few other commitments.

We both trust each other but I was wondering if anyone else has been in a similar situation and has any advice? I'm also a bit worried that I'm going to be the only person in my Halls going home at weekends.

Anything appreciated.

Thanks,

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What is she doing in her gap year? I speak from experience that boredom is a big relationship killer. A friend of mine was in the military (obligatory military service), later jobbing, and later job-related in the military and was abroad for weeks sometimes. Someone had to bring the cash home. His g/f was too bored to work and was just sitting on her arse at home all day. Sooner or later she took most of the stuff and just fucked off. And when he came home he found an almost empty flat.

    If she is working or doing other full-time activities I guess you will be fine.

    Sure 2 days a week is not a whole lot, but a lot more than other long distance relationship couples and if you think about it, you probably don't do a lot of cool stuff every day now, because you see each other so much. 5 days pass like nothing if you are busy and it makes the 2 weekend days so much more special.

    Don't worry about going home a lot. We had a few guys too who tripped home every weekend. Sometimes we were miffed, because we wanted to go out together, but meh. We lived.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    She's done the right thing and organised loads of work experience and she's got college as well as having a job so she won't be bored.

    Thanks for the good advice. Any other experiences still welcomed :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You have to think of the possibility you may meet someone else at university, I know you can't really think that far ahead... but your both meet different people...
    How long are you studying for? What is she planning to do after the gap year?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    also unless sailing was every weekend, you could invite your gf up to see you so you can stay at uni some weekends/give her a chance to see where you now live?
    I knew a few people who went home each weekend so you are unlikely to be the only one, but it wasn't common <-- but I think that depends on who you live with and how far away they live from uni, whether they have bf/gf at home etc.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heya! Listen, me and my bf have been together for 4 years and he only graduated from uni in June 2009. We started going out right before he went off to uni! I live in Leicestershire (Midlands) and he went to uni in Manchester. That's 2 and a half hours by train, never mind 55 mins! Lots of couples stay together through uni, you just have to plan ahead and take into consideration things like freshers week, exams when you might be able to see each other as much as you'd like. There were times when it was hard, like when we wouldn't see each other for ages due to various factors and when he got a new flatmate that fancied him. You just have to trust each other, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd stick with her. While you're at it, take her to your Nottingham Goose Fair which is on 6th-10th October :-)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    CoolMe wrote: »
    You have to think of the possibility you may meet someone else at university,

    Have you thought about the possibility that you may meet someone else at every point in life, like out and about on Friday evening? If you are happy with your current partner and relationship I don't think this is really a problem.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    StrubbleS wrote: »
    Have you thought about the possibility that you may meet someone else at every point in life, like out and about on Friday evening? If you are happy with your current partner and relationship I don't think this is really a problem.

    The man's (or woman's) gotta a point.
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