Am I a paedophile?

Former Member

I recently turned 18, and I know this girl, she's only 8, I sometimes baby sit her. When I do and her mum (single) is out really late (like 3 or 4), I go in her room and watch her for a bit, then wake her to sit downstairs with me. We usually watch some TV, or talk. I let her sit in my lap and every now and then I keep kissing her cheek or the back of her neck. Also, we get into tickle fights a lot. As I know where she is most ticklish, my hands tend to wander there, and always means I win where I end up laying on top of her. Even afterwards I keep on tickling her.

One time, just before I went to put her back to bed she took her nightgown off and crossed her arms and legs refusing to go to bed (she was still wearing her knickers). I'm ashamed to admit it, but I got a semi-erection. I did finally get her to bed wearing her nightgown. Now when ever I watch porn or see something that turns me on, it makes me think of that night, and her. I still wake her up when I baby sit, but since then I haven't been so close with her.

Don't get me wrong, I also think of her in a loving way. But I fear that I may like her too much for my age. Does this make me a paedophile?

Former Member

what. the. fuck?! :eek2:

seriously dude, either you're a troll or you've got serious issues

Former Member

From what you have described, most likely yes. This forum won't be of much help, so go see a doctor.

Former Member

Hang on a second. I didn't make any advancements to her, the kissing is because I love her like my family, and I didn't take it any further when she took her nightgown off. She likes the tickle fights, in fact she starts them, but I've resisted having as many as we used to. It's not like I'm actually trying to have sex or oral sex with her. My worry is more why I think of that night when I see something that turns me on.

Former Member

FriedBeans wrote: »

and I know this girl, she's only 8, I let her sit in my lap and every now and then I keep kissing the back of her neck

kissing her neck is not the kind of kiss you would give a family member.

my hands tend to wander there, and always means I win where I end up laying on top of her

I'm ashamed to admit it, but I got a semi-erection. I did finally get her to bed wearing her nightgown. Now when ever I watch porn or see something that turns me on, it makes me think of that night, and her.

clearly from your posts, your contact with this child is verging on inappropriate and therefore you need to distance yourself and seek professional help before the issue becomes substantially more serious

since then I haven't been so close with her.

Does this make me a paedophile?

if you've been put in charge of supervising this child's welfare then part of that duty of care is knowing where acceptable boundaries are. that fact that you've recognised that you've possibly crossed one of those boudaries is encouraging but you need to talk to a professional.

Former Member

Agreed. you need to take the initiative and stop babysitting this girl and also seek professional help for your desires. Good Luck.

Former Member

Tell her dad. He will tell you whether youre a paedophile or not for sure.

Former Member

There's nothing wrong in being a paedophile, it happens, and it is unfortunate.

What is wrong is acting on those feelings - and it sounds like you've recognised the issue in time.

I'd recommend you seek professional help, talking therapy may be enough to redirect your interests in more appropriate ways.

However, until you get things sorted you need to remove yourself from situations that reinforce the feelings - so no more baby sitting.

Ask yourself this - would you be happy to tickle fight like that while her mum was in the room?

Oh, and as a baby sitter, you suck - what the heck are you doing waking a child that's supposed to be asleep?

Former Member

My advice would be to STOP babysitting her all together. You clearly now what you are doing is wrong or else you wouldn't have come on here and be asking for advice. You should also bear in mind that legally you should not be babysitting anyone's child regularly unless you are either a close family member or registered child-minder.

Former Member

yes, you are a pedophile. Stop babysitting her at once and get help.

Former Member

Yes, you are. Please get help before you do more damage.

Former Member

Big Gay wrote: »

There's nothing wrong in being a paedophile, it happens, and it is unfortunate.

What is wrong is acting on those feelings - and it sounds like you've recognised the issue in time.

I'd recommend you seek professional help, talking therapy may be enough to redirect your interests in more appropriate ways.

However, until you get things sorted you need to remove yourself from situations that reinforce the feelings - so no more baby sitting.

Ask yourself this - would you be happy to tickle fight like that while her mum was in the room?

Oh, and as a baby sitter, you suck - what the heck are you doing waking a child that's supposed to be asleep?

this.

Former Member

Big Gay wrote: »

There's nothing wrong in being a paedophile, it happens, and it is unfortunate.

What is wrong is acting on those feelings - and it sounds like you've recognised the issue in time.

I'd recommend you seek professional help, talking therapy may be enough to redirect your interests in more appropriate ways.

However, until you get things sorted you need to remove yourself from situations that reinforce the feelings - so no more baby sitting.

Ask yourself this - would you be happy to tickle fight like that while her mum was in the room?

Oh, and as a baby sitter, you suck - what the heck are you doing waking a child that's supposed to be asleep?

^^^ What he said.

Former Member

you need to stay away from this child and sort out your own issues. You can't be responsible for this girl. How do you think the parents would feel?

Former Member

you need to stop babysitting straight away, because if you touched that poor girl. Not only would you be fucking her up for life, you also run a huge risk of either prison, or her parents fucking killing you if they found out, which they inevitably would.

What you say sounds really scary. What relation are you to this child? Why are you babysitting for them?

Former Member

As a mom this scares the shit out of me and makes me sick,
You really need to stay away from this child, you obviously know what your doing or thinking about is wrong otherwise you wouldnt come on here.

I dont think you are a paedophile yet but i think you could easily become one, even if you dont get professional help just keep your distance from this little girl before you mess up both your lives.

Former Member

cari wrote: »

you obviously know what your doing or thinking about is wrong otherwise you wouldnt come on here.

Ditto.

Former Member

Hi there FriedBeans,

Well done for looking for help here, it's a postive thing that you have recognised that your behaviour and thoughts could be concerning to you or to others close to this child. As the others say, it would be a good idea to stop the tickle fights and physical contact with this girl - for your own safety as well as for her.

There's a website called Stop It Now which can talk things through with you and help you stop the thoughts you are having - you can also email them if you would prefer. They have lots of experience of helping people with these sort of concerns and should be able to give you more information and support.

Best of luck.