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missing my mom :(
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
i havent seen my mom for almost 2yrs. she wont see me and i miss her. omg im even crying while i type this. what am i to do?
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I think you would need to give us a little more background if you want a meaningful response. Why wont your mum see you?
*hug* feel free to take your time, but we'd love to help you if you can give us more info.
Sick people aren't good to be around, so may be there is a good reason that you haven't seen your mum. She may have difficult issues that she needs to confront by herself before you can have a proper relationship. But that is no reason why you shouldn't stay in touch. It may be a bit of a one-way street at the moment, if she wont talk to you. However, you can still remind her that you love her and miss her with the odd letter or card with a bit of news about what you are up to. If your mum is depressed, a word from you might bring a little sunshine into her day - even if she doesn't feel able to respond at the moment.
isn't that a little bit of a broad analysis?
Not interested to see if she is different after 2 years? I can also understand why the bf thing might bother you, but it is her life afterall.
When you put it like that, yes. It does seem a little harsh. Even so, I'll stand by my comment in respect of the OP's description of her mum, who clearly has issues that would create an unhealthy home environment for a child. However, I hope that SDG finds a way of maintaining contact so that they may have a chance of a better relationship in the future.
The sad fact is that our parents aren't infallible. They are human and, though they seem impossibly old on the outside, they don't feel that way inside. My mum told me on her 60th birthday that she still felt 18 in her head. I didn't understand at the time, but I do now. I think I have matured a bit since 18, but I wouldn't say my attitude to life has changed much since I was about 22.
In my case, my father had numerous affairs and hurt my mum terribly. He eventually moved (and died) abroad. I didn't see much of him towards the end of his life. I didn't even get the chance to go to his funeral. My mum is a life-long depressive and recovering alcoholic. I love them both.
You have every right to be angry with your mum, but she is who she is. She can say what she wants to via Facebook, without fear of confrontation. I'm sure she feels guilty that she cannot care for you or give you the home she feels she should. She doesn't feel she can talk to you or respond to your emails, but somewhere, deep down, she is still your mum. If you want a relationship with her at all, you may have to accept her as she is.