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Why do I always think that if someone likes me, they're automatically a loser?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
I am 30 and female. Single for over a year (after a decade long relationship) and ready for a new relationship./ For some reason I seem to be "judging" anyone that shows interest in me (3 male friends have come forward to express their interest and I have met some men while out and about too). Someone who seems perfectly attractive, interesting, and suitable is immediately unattractive to me once they have told me they're interested. In general I am quite a normally popular, outgoing person who has lots of friends and a fairly healthy amount of men who seem to be attracted to me. I realise this is a strange position to be in as it's always flattering to have someone say they like you. But seems like I can no longer reciprocate attraction. I seem to be building up quite an arsenal of new male friends yet I am not attracted to any of them! Maybe I'm scared of commitment - it's possible. It was me who ended my 10 yr relationship - but how do I combat this weirdness!!?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    miss30 wrote: »
    ... seems like I can no longer reciprocate attraction. I seem to be building up quite an arsenal of new male friends yet I am not attracted to any of them! Maybe I'm scared of commitment - it's possible. It was me who ended my 10 yr relationship - but how do I combat this weirdness!!?

    Not weird at all. You simply don't fancy any of them. Perfectly normal in my book. Imagine the misery if we were attracted to every male friend lol!!! As I have said elsewhere, there is no telling who we end up being attracted to. Enjoy the attention and try not to worry.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    overthehill wrote: »
    Imagine the misery if we were attracted to every male friend lol!!!

    Eh? Men would love it! :thumb:

    To the OP - possibly you're dismissing these people because you aren't quite ready to get back on the market yet? A year may well be a very long time... but a decade is far longer, and will have had a massive impact on your life... :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Click to see more wrote: »
    Eh? Men would love it! :thumb:

    LOL. Would get a bit tiring/tiresome in the long run, me thinks. :crazyeyes
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    only read thread title, but I guess grave self-esteem problems. Dunno how you can overcome that, but if you don't you might have a hard time finding someone suitable for a relationship. Many couples think their spouse is a nerd/loser/weirdo when first meeting, but everything changes when you fall in love, because you don't care anymore what others lable them (or not to that extent).
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