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please dont judge me
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am with my fella for 2 and half years now. he is very quiet and doesnt like to socialise much. We spend every weekend together but we never do anything. weve never been out for dinner tho he cooks for me all the time. we av neva been away on a trip, we went shopping bout 6 times in all and to keep me happy he goes clubbing with me bout once every 3 months...however he treats me with respect, tells me he loves me all the time and gets on well with my family. He is a simple man from a very strict religious background and is always honest and tells the truth...even if it hurts...he is so straight forward and predictable and i absolutely love him so much and would never want to lose him.....so why do i keep on cheating on him, i an ashamed to say i have had 8 secret lovers in the time i av been with him i just need the excitment and attention...i kno im a slapper for doing this but i just cant beleve this man is happy with me...he encourages me to go out with friends even tho he neva goes out with his...he is jus happy sittin in his house when he comes home from work and watchin tv until the weekend comes and he spends time with me. I jus dont kno wer it will go as he beleves in livin each day at a time and thinks watever will be.....this is all so weird but i love him and certain he loves me...can this work....be interesting to see what others think...or should i count myself lucky:banghead:
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If you've felt the need to cheat on him 8 times in 2 years then clearly you aren't getting what you want from the relationship, and frankly, it sounds like he deserves better than the way you are treating him.
End it now, for both your sakes....
http://vbulletin.thesite.org/showthread.php?t=137944
http://vbulletin.thesite.org/showthread.php?t=137895
But it may be worth discussing it with him, if you do love him.
I hate to say it but quite a few of us are. He's evidently been brought up to treat women with respect, to stay loyal and loving. You repay him by sleeping around.
Angel have you been cheated on before? could that why you are questioning if he could be that loyal to you?
What a stupid thing to say.
There is clearly more at work here than just that she's cheating. OP obviously has issues with paranoia and insecurity and Strubbles, your comment was not helpful
I think you've been given some really good advice here Angel, I hope you manage to work through those feelings and make the right decision, I sense (and this is just a theory) but I wonder, if it turns out you have been cheated on before, do you think the reason you cheat, whether consciously or subconsciously is because you believe he will cheat on you because of your past experience? (obviously if you have not been cheating on then that view is kind of irrelevant)
It does sound like this guy does adore you but his upbringing and his way of life are quite different from you. It sounds like you do not have a lot in common, for example he is not a big fan of clubbing etc, this can put strain on the relationship as you find it hard to do things together that you both enjoy. but it kind of shows he is trying by doing some of these things. I would not say it makes him or you a bad person but maybe regardless of how much you love each other you do not connect in ways you can spend time together.