How long would you wait for someone?

Former Member

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Former Member

Depends how much you're into him i guess. Do you see a future with this guy or is he just a bit of fun for the time being?

Former Member

I think the fact that youre even questioning it, means that you probably shouldnt bother waiting.

I would wait for my boyfriend

Former Member

Its either a year or it isnt, clarify this, i dont understand why he would be a special case to allow him for 5 months?

Some people keep up relationships with army folk for far longer than a year.

Former Member

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Former Member

Dont see how it can be a massive difference in chance to train having an extra 7 months. Fair enough i joined up in the UK willingly, but I have to do 4 years service. Training for my trade (including basic) comes to just short of a year.

Former Member

Some information for those reading
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conscription_in_Turkey

Former Member

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Former Member

To be honest, if I didn't whole-heartedly think that 'he's the one' then I would doubt wanting to wait for that year.

In my current situation, I would wait for my bf because I know that we're just that strong, we've both had long term relationships and this one has real depth and strenght that I can't just give up.

What really worries you? Do you just dread the idea of being 'off the market' for a year without that person to fulfil the role? Do you worry you'll stray, you'll go off him or vice versa? Do you feel like you could move on without him being there or are you feeling like you'll regret the decision?

Former Member

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Former Member

Its a bit different considering he doesnt really have a choice. A year away with better pay and conditions, or 6 months with worse conditions and worse pay, but less time away from you?

I got caught in a conundrum with the lady of my dreams, she wouldnt allow something to work while I was in the army, as she couldnt deal with the lack of seeing me, or the potential for me being in harms way. Also would kick my arse if I gave up on a mega oppertunity that I have with the armed forces.

I still keep in touch, and shes actually due to her work not going to be too far away from where im based now, but meh, its a big messy situation.

Former Member

if you really love him then this wouldnt be a problem and you would wait for him.

Former Member

A year would be nothing, if I had to wait for the right girl.

Former Member

he doesnt have a choice whether to go or not. I think its mean not to wait, but then again if youre not that into him, then why not finish it now?

Former Member

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Former Member

My girlfriend worked a year abroad once. You can keep up a long distance relationship by e-mails, telephone and posting snapshots through the post. As long as both are suited to relating this distance apart physically, it will last till together again!

A lot depends on your family experience as a child(relationship to mother and father) and early adult experience of relating to the other sex- if you both have compatible relationship patterns, then waiting a year is possible

Former Member

everyone I know did not split up because of military/civil service.

Doesn't he get out on weekends?

Pretty funny you have to ask. Either you love him and wait, or you don't and don't wait. Loving someone and not waiting because of one measly year of military service is pretty ridiculous in my opinion, but hey ho.

Former Member

You wait for as long as you think you can. I was in a situation once where I had to wait 2 years to be with the women I loved. If you love them and you feel you can wait then wait. If not don't. There's no hard and fast rules, it's purely down personal preference.

Former Member

What you need to appreciate is that this won't be the only time he is away. If he is right for you then this should be something you can accept, if you are questionning waiting a year then maybe you don't feel that strongly for him. A year is quite a long time and you don't want to wait a year and when he returns find you wish you hadn't. I think that time will tell, explain to him how you feel and see what happens when he goes. Absence makes the heart grow fonder! Or not as the case may be.