If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
When are single people officially single?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey there,
Well I met this new girl, at first it was someone I kinda knew but never thought about, we ended up talking a lot, went out with a group of friends before the end of term and really clicked, talked all night - you know when you just click. So been talking to her over the internet, she's saying it would be cool to come visit me since she's got nothing for the summer and it's a quick ride, I said that would be great.. mentioned it to my mum and she's a bit off with it.
Thing is, I'm still friends with my ex from all this time ago, even though we are very much single now. Long story short: went out, together two years, cheat on each other in different ways (I kissed another girl, she started another relationship 'online' and then started hooking up IRL), went our seperate ways, got back together about 6 months later, spent a year 'together' but it was like a half relationship, with lots of stress - so 18 months ago or so split up finally.
We still spend plenty of time together and I would say we are best friends, which is fine. Thing is, my mum has said it's unfair to my ex if I start dating again, but then.. what am I supposed to do? It's not like I've ever stuck my nose in my ex's love life in the past 18 months, except on one occasion when a 'friend' of hers (they werent going out) was calling her a bitch / slut by text when she was on holiday with me (we went on hols as a group of friends, about 9 of us). He was just really jealous and I told her it was obviously upsetting her so she should ignore him for the rest of the holiday and try and have fun!
But other than that I wouldn't stop her from dating or another relationship, and though I know she cares about my deeply I don't think she would stop me either. But then, perhaps this is male ignorance as pointed out by my mum, that there are unwritten rules. Maybe it's because my mum likes my ex and would quite like us to settle down in a few years or something. I don't know.
Any tips guys? I'm not even dating this new girl, she's just awesome and wants to come visit me, we'll probably go out as friends and see Leicester and stuff, not really thinking about what may or may not happen at all just really want to spend more time with her. But now I've got this worry floating over my head. I asked some friends and they said that I've got every right to see anyone I like - I'm single - but I shouldn't go and rub it in my ex's face which seems fair enough.
Well I met this new girl, at first it was someone I kinda knew but never thought about, we ended up talking a lot, went out with a group of friends before the end of term and really clicked, talked all night - you know when you just click. So been talking to her over the internet, she's saying it would be cool to come visit me since she's got nothing for the summer and it's a quick ride, I said that would be great.. mentioned it to my mum and she's a bit off with it.
Thing is, I'm still friends with my ex from all this time ago, even though we are very much single now. Long story short: went out, together two years, cheat on each other in different ways (I kissed another girl, she started another relationship 'online' and then started hooking up IRL), went our seperate ways, got back together about 6 months later, spent a year 'together' but it was like a half relationship, with lots of stress - so 18 months ago or so split up finally.
We still spend plenty of time together and I would say we are best friends, which is fine. Thing is, my mum has said it's unfair to my ex if I start dating again, but then.. what am I supposed to do? It's not like I've ever stuck my nose in my ex's love life in the past 18 months, except on one occasion when a 'friend' of hers (they werent going out) was calling her a bitch / slut by text when she was on holiday with me (we went on hols as a group of friends, about 9 of us). He was just really jealous and I told her it was obviously upsetting her so she should ignore him for the rest of the holiday and try and have fun!
But other than that I wouldn't stop her from dating or another relationship, and though I know she cares about my deeply I don't think she would stop me either. But then, perhaps this is male ignorance as pointed out by my mum, that there are unwritten rules. Maybe it's because my mum likes my ex and would quite like us to settle down in a few years or something. I don't know.
Any tips guys? I'm not even dating this new girl, she's just awesome and wants to come visit me, we'll probably go out as friends and see Leicester and stuff, not really thinking about what may or may not happen at all just really want to spend more time with her. But now I've got this worry floating over my head. I asked some friends and they said that I've got every right to see anyone I like - I'm single - but I shouldn't go and rub it in my ex's face which seems fair enough.
0
Comments
My best advice, be sensitive - I think you're unlikely to rub your exes face in it but hell,if you like someone you should meet whoever you want and your mum and effectively your ex too, will have to get over any issues they have with it. I'm close friends with that ex too - we function well as friends and terribly as lovers and we are both in different relationships and if anything, can talk about it freely because we know what was wrong with 'us' and now we're friends. You have been apart long enough so if you want to go on dates or see someone new, you're entitled to start afresh with something a lot healthier than what you were in.
Aye
Seriously though, forget about your past. You have been single long enough. I cant see why anyone would have a problem :thumb: