need help :(

Former Member

I'm really sorry but as I'm typing this I have nooo idea how long its actually going to be....

I dont know where to start...

I've been with my partner (male) for 3 1/2 years, we have a daughter together, are engaged, and have a mortgage....

My life has been perfect, we both worked full time, then when i had my daughter I went back to work part time and i've decided to go to university in september, my reltionship has never been happier... now the complicated bit

I have been speaking to a lad on my internet since i was 13 years old (am now 22) and not long after having my daughter (whilst on maternity leave) we began speaking alot, we decided after many months of speaking (as friends, very encouraging and friendly) that we should finally meet up after 9 years of speaking! i met him and quite frankly, have fallen in love with him... he's amazing

now dont get me wrong my current partner is amazing he is an amazing dad and an amazing man so i dont know how this situation has happened

i met up with this internet lad a few times, we kissed and stuff and got closer, eventually it got to me and i confessed all to my partner, who said he'd take me back and i should stop all contact with this person, which i had agreed to

but what my partner doesnt know was for the last say 8 months i have been texting and speaking to this lad DAY IN DAY OUT morning till night (only told my boyfriend bout him about 2 weeks ago) and since confessing, i had met up with this ladand actually attempted to have sex with him.... with this a few days later i confessed all to my mother who told me i must STOP this, the father of my daughter is an amzing man and does not deserve this. stopped talking to internet lad a few hours ago, my heart is breaking... what is wrong with me???

i'm currently off work with stress with financial struggles and relationship issues

my partner thinks all is well now, and im just a bit down...

i have no idea what to do, i feel so rotten, i think i'm madly in love with internet boy!!! please offer some sort of advice for me, i think i'm going mental

THANK YOU ANYONE WHO REPLIES!!!!

**helen**

Hey girlygoo,

Sorry to hear you're feeling so overwhelmed by this situation.

It sounds like the relationship with 'internet boy' might be a way of you finding some sort of excitement or drama in your life that's lacking elsewhere - or a way for you to forget about other issues that are causing you worry.

You say you have an amazing partner who is also a good dad and an amazing man, but at the same time you couldn't help yourself from turning to this other guy for affection and possibly more. Perhaps you are missing some of the spark you had in the early days of your relationship? TheSite has an article on successful monogamy that you may find interesting - it talks about good communication, trust and staying excited.

You say you have 'financial struggles' and 'relationship issues'. Falling into the arms of a new person is rarely the answer. Often problems are transferred from one situation to another only for someone to realise what they've lost by walking away from a situation where there was love and respect.

It's great that you've started to cut contact with this 'internet boy' and although it will be really tough, it may well be good to keep this distance going until you've been able to resolve things with your current man.

This is just a start to the discussion, so do post again to let us know how you're doing and we can do our best to support you further.