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I feel so dumb
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
OK, this hasn't been a particularly easy week for me, though I'm no way condoning my behaviour, but I'm feeling so stupid after doing very stupid stuff last night.
Basically I'm still mates with this guy, let's call him P. I've known P since we were about 13 or so? When we were 15 we dated and it was all lovey dovey yadda yadda yadda. Obviously not together now but still good friends. I lost my virginity to him etc.
Once before, when I was about 19 I broke up with my long term bf (who I later got back together with) and whilst we were apart I saw P a few times. And one time I ended up sleeping with him again. I felt really stupid for this and wish I could take it back. He got all really emotional about it, started talking about us having a long distance relationship and would drive up to see me at weekends when I had absolutely no interest in getting together with him. We smoothed things out and things have been fine since then.
Anyway, I've moved back to the area and last night we met up. He came and picked me up and drove me back to his. We got a taxi to a pub down the road under the premise of a night out (oh how wrong was that). It was really boring... his mates weren't drinking... they were talking about car tax and boring stuff like that. I proceeded to get rather drunk.
Went back to his at about 10pm (told you it was a boring night out) and proceeded to drink all the vodka in the house (only half a bottle but enough to floor me).
I woke up this morning, naked in his bed... with only my hoodie upstairs, a thumping hangover and remembered snatches from the night before.
The sex was AWFUL and I pretty much told him (as I was drunk... no excuse) and coming downstairs was really fucking awkward. I know I made a big mistake and was an utter bitch with it. He drove me home and it was... awkward to say the least.
I feel really bad because I've known this guy for a long time and even though we don't have anything in common anymore it's nice to have a link like that to my past.
I've text him apologising for my behaviour but how can I avoid this happening again? The worst bit is I know he's told alllllll of his bandmates who I also know and any time I see them around my area I'm going to be like Oh god... fuck. Shit.
And for the record I'm actually rather annoyed at him because he KNEW how drunk I was and he was barely tipsy and having just broken up with my ex was feeling vulnerable.... it's really unlike him to take advantage of the situation like that and would have expected him to be a bit more of a gentleman... not to mention this morning he made me feel like an utter tramp with snipey little remarks.
I know I'm a bitch and all but I really don't want this happening again but still want to be his mate.
Basically I'm still mates with this guy, let's call him P. I've known P since we were about 13 or so? When we were 15 we dated and it was all lovey dovey yadda yadda yadda. Obviously not together now but still good friends. I lost my virginity to him etc.
Once before, when I was about 19 I broke up with my long term bf (who I later got back together with) and whilst we were apart I saw P a few times. And one time I ended up sleeping with him again. I felt really stupid for this and wish I could take it back. He got all really emotional about it, started talking about us having a long distance relationship and would drive up to see me at weekends when I had absolutely no interest in getting together with him. We smoothed things out and things have been fine since then.
Anyway, I've moved back to the area and last night we met up. He came and picked me up and drove me back to his. We got a taxi to a pub down the road under the premise of a night out (oh how wrong was that). It was really boring... his mates weren't drinking... they were talking about car tax and boring stuff like that. I proceeded to get rather drunk.
Went back to his at about 10pm (told you it was a boring night out) and proceeded to drink all the vodka in the house (only half a bottle but enough to floor me).
I woke up this morning, naked in his bed... with only my hoodie upstairs, a thumping hangover and remembered snatches from the night before.
The sex was AWFUL and I pretty much told him (as I was drunk... no excuse) and coming downstairs was really fucking awkward. I know I made a big mistake and was an utter bitch with it. He drove me home and it was... awkward to say the least.
I feel really bad because I've known this guy for a long time and even though we don't have anything in common anymore it's nice to have a link like that to my past.
I've text him apologising for my behaviour but how can I avoid this happening again? The worst bit is I know he's told alllllll of his bandmates who I also know and any time I see them around my area I'm going to be like Oh god... fuck. Shit.
And for the record I'm actually rather annoyed at him because he KNEW how drunk I was and he was barely tipsy and having just broken up with my ex was feeling vulnerable.... it's really unlike him to take advantage of the situation like that and would have expected him to be a bit more of a gentleman... not to mention this morning he made me feel like an utter tramp with snipey little remarks.
I know I'm a bitch and all but I really don't want this happening again but still want to be his mate.
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