How to be happily married....

Former Member

My marriage of 18 months (relationship of 6 years) has just come close to falling apart. Following suspicions, I found intimate messages between my husband and some girl he went to school with on our PC. I could go into great detail about the heartache, but that would do no good. After the initial few days we finally talked openly, and it felt like the first time we had been close for so long. We love each other so much and because we have broken down all the barriers and resentment that had built up between us, we have been having sex like when we first met. Hearts racing, bodies entwined. I feel so turned on just when he looks at me a certain way. We have promised to try and keep this closeness and passion alive but I am scared it will all fade away, and that our mundane lives will take over again.
Can anyone relate to this and have any ideas how to keep things alive long term?

Former Member

I have never been in a relationship as long as you but my best friend has been with her boyfriend for over 7 years now and they had a crisis just recently and almost broke up after she confessed to fancying someone else and not sure what she wanted anymore. They managed to work things out and now things are better than ever as they went through the same thing as you and really talked about everything and how they both felt about their relationship and solved a number of issues.

I think when you've been with someone for so long your relationship does go off a bit and I believe most relationships will have a crisis at some point (also known as the 7 year glitch) and it's a make or break point. The affair that your husband had was a product of the problems in your relationship and I think it's great that you worked it out as it shouldn't always be the end of things.

I'm afraid that mundane life will eventually creep back but if you both keep communicating with each other about how you're feeling, your desires and needs then it should keep you both in a happy marriage. Also making sure you spend time together as a couple (dinner, drinks, romantic breaks away) will help to keep the passion going too. Good luck

Former Member

This touches something im worried about. Just out of interest how do you feel about your husband now compared to when you first got together? Is there feelings you have lost?

I have recently found love for the first time and it has got me thinkin about the future. Its just all the nice lovey stuff at the moment and in a way i dont want it to change from that. I know its silly worrying about the future but im worried about getting properly involved as im scared it will start a relatinship life span, if you know what i mean.

Its nice to hear that description of your sex life as its exactly how i feel now so im happy that you can feel that after time. I guess i sort of want to ask the same as you but only for the start of a relationship.

I wish you all the best with your hubby and i hope love is in the air