aparently people at uni think i'm a heavy duty dyke...

Former Member

Ok, at a glance at my social life i can see why, i do martial arts, i drink pints, i like heavy metal, most of my mates are lesbians or male, and i do wear comfortable shoes (but they're black patent DMs!)

Ok i'm am bi, but i have a problem with being boxed up as a dyke (sexuality doesn't come into it, some of my most feminine friends are lesbians, its the stereo type of being a dyke - and not a lesbian- that i have a problem with)

i wasn't feeling hugely femenine anyway, and being told that people thought/think i am has made me feel worse...

i am on a predominantly male course as well, so i kinda have to be down with the boys...but how the hell can i feel more feminine and get rid of this horrible horrible stereotype...

Former Member

dye your hair blonde. Perfect a coquettish giggle, diet to a size about two thirds of what is healthy, enrol on a makeup course or something to do with childcare or bunnies.

Former Member

Shag your way through the guys, that should put that rumor to bed. :thumb:

Former Member

i do prefer you suggestion to suzy's...

but realistically...? it would take me ages to get through all of them!

Former Member

who cares what they think?

it could have been meant as a joke or just a way to get a reaction out of you. if you want to make yourself feel more feminine just take a bubble bath! i always thought you liked having your own style anywho

Former Member

clementine_the_tangerine wrote: »

who cares what they think?

it could have been meant as a joke or just a way to get a reaction out of you. if you want to make yourself feel more feminine just take a bubble bath! i always thought you liked having your own style anywho

Exactly.

It doesn't matter what they think. Bollocks to them.

Former Member

i do, i just wondered if i was my behaviour rather than anything else...i want a bath badly...only got a shower....:(

Former Member

twisted_trinity wrote: »

i do prefer you suggestion to suzy's...

but realistically...? it would take me ages to get through all of them!

Double time?

Former Member

theres 69 of them...thats about 3 a week for the rest of the term

Former Member

twisted_trinity wrote: »

theres 69 of them...thats about 3 a week for the rest of the term

going to be a busy term then

Former Member

2 a night, 3 nights of the week, thats 6 a week.

Former Member

Who cares what they think ive been called gay thousands of times i just laugh it up

im really not gay btw

Former Member

i wouldn't have a problem if someone called me a lesbian
but they called me a dyke, and it wasn't 1 it was 5...

not happy....

Former Member

If your bi then yeh i guess you do class as a dyke in a way..but straight aswell (duhh) so it shouldnt worry you?

Former Member

grahaminneed wrote: »

If your bi then yeh i guess you do class as a dyke in a way..but straight aswell (duhh) so it shouldnt worry you?

A dyke being a derogatory piece of slang commonly used (AFAIK) to denote masculine homosexual women, I really dont think that she classes as one.

Former Member

oh right i never knew there was a difference. =]

Former Member

I'm afraid with people like that whatever you do will not change the fact that they will always place people in catergories. It's safer for them in their own minds to do that. Id probably place it down to you either intimidate them, have offended them by not sleeping with them or they downright don't understand you. This means they have to pigeon hole you.
Ignore the comment, tell them just because you won't sleep with them and are more of a man than they ever will be it doesn't make you gay. That's usually what i tell people.
I've been buttonholed as a lesbian since I was 18 because i'm intensely private about my love life and don't gob off in the pub about it. Also i do martial arts, drink cider and generally am more macho than a lot of the men in the pub :thumb: I can still be girly though and wear heels and a dress, believe me, this will not change you in their minds into being girly and straight.
I like to look at it as being a strong independant female. You don't have to be a lesbian to be one of those :yes:
And yes the word dyke is offensive to a lot of people, but then so are swear words but people use them all the time even when we don't want them to. You just have to ignore the fact that they're ignorant people. If you feel the need to why not educate them on the "dyke" word and why it's not used.

Former Member

I thought all girls collectively decided they were going to all turn 'bi' back in 2003 or thereabouts. It's been years since I last met a straight girl under 30, so I'm really surprised it's an issue.

Former Member

The Convincer wrote: »

I thought all girls collectively decided they were going to all turn 'bi' back in 2003 or thereabouts. It's been years since I last met a straight girl under 30, so I'm really surprised it's an issue.

WTF ARE you talking about? I know plenty of straight girls (being one myself as well)

TT:Who care what people at uni think about you? You are unquie character and there is nothing wrong with that at all. I'm one of the boys, the only girlin my office and have no interest in pink fluffy girly things and I dont care what people make of because I know I'm bring true to myself.

Former Member

purplebutterfly wrote: »

WTF ARE you talking about? I know plenty of straight girls (being one myself as well)

I think you know full well what I'm talking about - the Katy Perry generation and all that. Anyway, I wasn't being entirely serious, obviously.

Former Member

The Convincer wrote: »

I thought all girls collectively decided they were going to all turn 'bi' back in 2003 or thereabouts. It's been years since I last met a straight girl under 30, so I'm really surprised it's an issue.

Former Member

i don't know anyone IRL that is bi...i have a fair few lesbian friends but that besides the point...

and hunny, i'm too old for being part of the katie perry generation!

Former Member

There is a serious and highly interesting observation behind what I said though. People have this weird idea that female homosexuality is more accepted than male homosexuality but when you look at it properly, it isn't. Pretty much every young girl who wants to be popular is french kissing her friends for attention, but the unwritten assumption is that although they're 'bi', they're not really bisexual, they're still only romantically vunerable to men. But as soon as any female homosexual attraction actually seems genuine, it's like "lolz dyke!" and many straight people of both genders don't seem to like it.

So in a way, it seems to me that it may actually more difficult to be a genuine female bisexual or lesbian than be a gay or bisexual man.

Anyone else noticed this?

Former Member

i think you are being a bit of a narrow minded pratt to be honest...

Former Member

My observations are my observations.

Former Member

as are mine...

Former Member

Well, I say "same back" to post 24 then.

Former Member

How the hell is she a narrow minded person?

Shes been getting the abuse off people because she is different, and has widely ranging views.

Former Member

The Convincer wrote: »

There is a serious and highly interesting observation behind what I said though. People have this weird idea that female homosexuality is more accepted than male homosexuality but when you look at it properly, it isn't. Pretty much every young girl who wants to be popular is french kissing her friends for attention, but the unwritten assumption is that although they're 'bi', they're not really bisexual, they're still only romantically vunerable to men. But as soon as any female homosexual attraction actually seems genuine, it's like "lolz dyke!" and many straight people of both genders don't seem to like it.

So in a way, it seems to me that it may actually more difficult to be a genuine female bisexual or lesbian than be a gay or bisexual man.

Anyone else noticed this?

That is one of the biggest sets of closed and narrow minded stereotypeings that ive seen for a long time.

Former Member

Ignore them twisted trinity be cool+stay true to YOURSELF dont change if your comftable that what matters im bisexual but you woudnt think i was x:wave:+ YOU ROCK GIRL there only jealous x

Former Member

awww G i'm gonna miss you sticking up for me when you go off to kill people!