I dont want to give up =[

BillieTheBot

Okay so..

My girl friend broke up with me about 2 weeks ago because i didnt see her much and i didnt talk to her much on msn for about a month..so she ended it fair enough but i didnt realise how much she ment to be n now shes gone im lost...like a part of me is missing
i admit i did things wrong i basically shoved her to the side n got on with my PC life which is bad enough (not world of warcraft b4 anyone asks) but i am addicted

i need the chance to prove i mean what i say by i can change n do better


shes had a fair few boyfriends in the past but they were all twats to her n she said to me i was the best boyfriend in the world which made me feel great but today on the phone (best i cud do i cudnt see her in person shes busy all the time) i said id try harder and promised that...not them words exactly but u know what i mean

anyway she didnt buy it its because her best friend is a total whore..fuckin sleeps round town bike near enough.

anyway she is very influential and i think shes leaned my ex to the side of not giving me another chance..love deserves a 2nd chance?

on the phone she was like stop contacting me but then i said ''what do i have to do to get you back n make us happy again''' and she replied with ''give me time graham''

but then she snapped again n hung up


im lost my friends are telling me to give up but i only need 1 chance to prove i mean what i say

do i listen to my friends or do i carry on n give her time like she said =[?

help

Former Member

Are you sure it wouldn't be wiser to move on? You could promise to change for her and everything, but aren't ypou putting yourself across as a biot of a doormat if you do that?

Either way, there's no easy way back into her arms if that's wjhat you really want, I'd say just enjoy yourself (well, try to anyway) and spend time with your mates. If they're good enough they're surely looking out for you here anyway.

Former Member

Hi Graham,

Just to quickly say you might want to spend some time posting replies without the text talk and lack of capitals. As we point out in the good manners guide there's no time limit on posting and posting in this way can makes posts very difficult for people to read. It can also risk people being dismissive of your problems.

As to the situation you're describing - Your friends seem to be telling you to stop calling and contacting your ex - because they don't think there will be any hope of a relationship. She seems to be telling you to stop contacting her at the moment - maybe with a chance of something again in the future.

So, it does seem that right now everyone is suggesting the same thing, though not necessarily for the same reasons. Might be worth thinking about that suggestion.

We also have a few factsheets on break-ups you might find helpful -

Mending a broken heart
http://www.thesite.org/sexandrelationships/singles/singlelife/mendingabrokenheart

Accepting it's over
http://www.thesite.org/sexandrelationships/singles/singlelife/acceptingitsover

Hope something in there can help

Former Member

No problem i needed advice as soon as i could get it thats why i didnt use capitals.


And..i know it does sound like im a doormat but its just the one chance to prove i mean what i say and do things right.
Thats it really im not going to bed or anything like that i just want to know the best option, i dont want it to be over im only 16 but i really do belive she is the love of my life which will sound stupid to other people but i belive that!

So..should i actually try to move on (even though i dont want to) or just give her time like she wants and then try again when the time feels right (if it ever will) ?

Former Member

Perhaps you should just take things one step at a time. Your mates are of course a good source of support at times like this.

Beleive me, I've been there before. I remember once heading for the pub with my best mate the evening after I broke up from my girlfriend. I tried to put things behind me but even their company didn't stop me feeling depressed and wanting to go home early that night.

However, a few days later I noticed things slowly improving, but it was still difficult, but in my case I was with her for over a year, which is obviously a large enough chunk out of a young fella's life. In my case, it was a matter of weeks, many weeks, but there's never an easy way out of relationships.

Fact of life mate.

Former Member

I mean i have a PC addiction which is a problem all i wanted was for her to sit me down and say summit like ''youve got a PC addiction if you carry on like this were gonna have to break up'' i mean she did warn me but.. i never took notice coz it was over msn and you never know how people say things on msn.

Im gettin abuse n grief of some of her friends saying stuff like "Oh youre not worth it" and all that

which is fair enough id probly do that if i was them but i didnt do something that out of order its a problem ive had for a fair few years but then i didnt have anything to stop it for but now i do

Dammit i only need 1 chance but im clueless on how to prove to her i can do it so i have to give her space atm thats what some of my friends are saying others just say leave it it wont work =/ im clueless.

sorry about the long rant and lack of fullstops

Former Member

Hey Graham.

Sorry to hear things didn't go over well. I would just give her time as she asked for this and let her think about things. She doesn't seem to want you to contact her at the moment. Calling or going over to her house isn't going to accomplish anything positive at the moment.

Give her some time and space and see what happens. There is a possibility that things aren't going to go your way just be prepared to deal with that if that is the case. Best of luck to you.

Former Member

I dont mean this in a nasty way, but you could prove all you want, and she may still turn around and say no thankyou.

Former Member

Yeah me n her didnt argue that often though maybe once a month i suppose, something tells me that its not time to give up yet though so ill give her space

Also it will be easier to get over her if things go wrong yet again; at least i can say i tried