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Being stalked by ex,hate feeling intimidated
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Has anyone out there had any similar experiences, and how did they cope? The worst of it is that he is also my neighbour and I can't see it getting any better. He's broken into my flat, followed me to work and spat at me,dug up my garden, weird shit!! Just wanted to get it off my chest I suppose, have contacted police but just know that tonight Im going to have a barrage of foul texts at least. Any advise please?
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Stalking is very serious and very scary to go through. Whilst i've not been through it myself, I have sat up most of the night listening to threats from a very nasty person who took against a friend of mine.
You say you've been in contact with the police, have they put you in touch with their specialist officers who deal with this kind of thing? We spoke to one about the situation above and because they were very well trained they knew what to look out for. They can also make you a priority if you call the police, it will flag to them that you have reported this problem before and so they prioritise your call.
There are many options, including going to court and getting a restraining order, but for that as many people have pointed out you will need evidence. Examples of evidence is notes he might have written, texts, pictures of things he has done, a diary of what has happened when, video, answerphone messages etc.
Its tempting to get rid of lots of this kind of evidence (particularly texts) as you don't want to hear it / see it but you need to keep it and hand it over directly to the police.
Stalking is a very subtle crime and requires handling in a special way. The police will not talk to him unless you ask them to, they don't just blunder in.
If you ever feel seriously afraid but don't want to wait for the police, arrange with someone (friend/family) that its always okay for you to turn up out of the blue at anytime, either get them to pick you up or get a cab directly to their place.
I'm sorry if i'm scaring you with this information but its better to have a plan and to think about it rather than panic in an already difficult situation.
This is an information and advice sheet about stalking and what to do.
Oftentimes people like this really do give up after a while and move on. The nasty guy who was harrassing my friend also gave up after a little while and so please don't be overly alarmed, I am just trying to give you some sensible precautions.
Keep posting, tell your friends and family about this - keeping this a secret only gives this guy power.
Talk it through with the police and they will help you, and if they don't then keep reporting and reporting until they listen to you.
Good luck and hope he loses interest soon. Feel free to PM me if you want further information.
Lisa