fathers right and stuff

Former Member

has anyone been in a situation where you are the mother of a child, no longer with the father and dont get on?

i am in this situation and the father is making all sorts of demands at me which i am sure he cannot make and just wanted someone to have a private chat with really so that i know what steps to take.

ive searched online but nothing seems to fit with whats going on with me.

Former Member

Hiya,

This is something that comes up all the time on askTheSite, so our legal experts are used to answering the questions. That isn't to replace the advice you can get on the boards but it might be worth asking a question as well to see how they can help.

Former Member

thanx jim, ive sent them a message

Former Member

I think it may be worth you speaking to a proper solicitor about it tbh. I think it would be worth the money in this situation.

From what I can gather though, his legal rights are very limited in this situation. I dont know whether you are working or in receipt of benefits but you might be able to get free legal advice. Have you contacted the CAB?

Former Member

i have spoken to the CAB but to be honest they werent very helpful and didnt tell me anything which i hadnt already found out myself online.

i have no chance of affording a solicitor, i am on maternity leave now and only get £117 a week before tax! how do i even go about contacting someone or finding out if i am entitled to legal aid?

Former Member

Legal Aid Calculator

Obviously i don't know everythign about you but i think it will say that you are entitled to help

ETA that whilst i was looking I came across Gingerbread who looked like they might be of help as well and at least had some useful links.

Former Member

My friend is in this situation and if only his girlfriend would co-operate with him they'd be a lot happier.


You should not exclude the father from your childs life as long as he is trying too.

You may not get on, but a friendly chat and co-operation go a long way. Step back for a few moments and think how could you make it fairer, please don't act without due care.

Former Member

FreeLifting wrote: »

My friend is in this situation and if only his girlfriend would co-operate with him they'd be a lot happier.


You should not exclude the father from your childs life as long as he is trying too.

You may not get on, but a friendly chat and co-operation go a long way. Step back for a few moments and think how could you make it fairer, please don't act without due care.

i know you are offering advice and i do appreciate it. but you do not know the whole story. i have never said to him he cannot see the baby, i havent said that even once to him. but he is making unreasonable demands and being threatening towards me.
and yes a chat and co-operation would go a long way, but you are talking to the wrong person here! i have tried time and again and have been more than fair.
please do not assume that i am the problem here.

Former Member

Threatening you isn't going to help him or demanding anything from you.

He is probably finding it hard to understand and then is venting this through anger and agression towards you.

Have a word with him on the phone, tell him you know that he is angry and your willing to talk with him as long as he doesn't get out of hand.

Tell him straight that being angry and agressive isn't going to work and that if he could relax a little you'd be more than willing to consider a plan of action.

I hope for you and your baby's sake that he doesn't do anything stupid.

You could also try giving samaritans a ring as they could probaby organise a mentoring appointment for the both of you.

Best of luck and wish you well in the future.

Bunnie

Many law firms do an initial interview free.

If you have a look on http://www.lawsociety.org.uk/choosingandusing/findasolicitor.law?=lshome you can find all the solicitors in your area that deal with family law.

Give them a call, and ask if they do legal aid or at least an initial free interview.

I wish I could help more, but I don't know the whole situation, and wouldnt be able to give you the advice you probably need.

Hope it all works out hun.

Former Member

FreeLifting wrote: »

You could also try giving samaritans a ring as they could probaby organise a mentoring appointment for the both of you.

B

im pretty sure that isnt a service Samaritans provide

Former Member

While it might not be a service the samaritans provide, there are many organisations that do.

Could be something worth looking into.

Former Member

I think having someone as a go between could help a lot. Best of luck in any case bb but I think you as the primary carer are protected by law so don't worry about his threats. Of course if they're threats of violence I'd get the police involved though.