Home› Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options

Help!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Heyy :wave: i have a problem and i dont know what to do. Well its been nearly two weeks since my boyfriend of 5 months moved back to london to go live with his mum who had never wanted him and we split up. The week after(last week) he was beng nice to me saying he missed me but it wouldnt work and i could accept that. I knew he wasnt coming back and i was sort of happy for him because he had finally got what he wanted but i was really angry because its selfish what he did. i gave everything to him and and i really loved him. Then last weekend, he turned nasty. and then the other day i spoke to him online and he said he didnt want to talk to me but we were still friends. To be honest its better for me not to talk to him becoz that way i dont get too upset and im trying to move on, i just really miss him. But last night, his ex( i dont think they were serious)from where he lives and shes sorta my mate too rang me, and told me he has a new girlfriend. I cut her off and cried my eyes out. I know i shouldnt of done but a few hours later i rung her and asked her. She told me he has a new girlfriend and is chatting up her mates. Im not really sure what to believe because a few days ago she wasnt being that nice to me and had a go at me but apologised. This doesnt sound like something he would do but then again maybe he just wants to forget me. i just want to know, did he truly love me? He has a lot of family problems and when we first met christmas time last year, he was upset and everything for having to move here. i dont know what to do and who to believe anymore....:( its so fustrating :banghead:

Comments

  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Welcome to the boards, Emily. :)

    I am sure he did love/care for you but he has had to move on too. Perhaps his new girlfriend is just a 'rebound' thing to try and get his life in order in some way so don't take it all too personally.

    Please forgive me if I sound patronising but you're 15 and so you were unlikely to ever 'marry' this guy. It's part of being a teen in love. Staying 'friends' with him after you have felt such intense emotions for him, does seem as though its the 'mature' thing to do .. but most people find out that it is a very hard thing to do. He has a new life, he has a new girlfriend and he lives far away, so what's the point in maintaining the friendship when it will hurt you so much?

    You look awfully pretty and so I think you should dry your eyes, brush yourself down, smile and find another guy who will love and appreciate you in return. You had a good time with your ex but it's over now. Don't waste any more emotional energy on him. *hugs*
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you that has helped actually.:yippe: Its just he changed his tune so quick. I mean i knew we wernt ever going to get married and all that rubbish but he was like my first and everything.... And im not sure wheather to belive her or not because ive been told shes a bit of a stirrer...
    x
  • Options
    TashJTashJ Posts: 79 Budding Regular
    Hey there Emzii and welcome to the boards,

    It?s totally understandable that you?re feeling confused and upset right now. Breaking up with someone can be really hard ? after all it sounds like you really cared about this guy, and that he was a huge part of your life for five months. Asking yourself questions about what happened and how he felt is a normal part of dealing with a breakup, but unfortunately there are usually no quick answers.

    Try and take extra care of yourself over the next couple of days and weeks ? eat well, exercise, and spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself. You also might want to write down how you?re feeling in a journal. You might find that, with time, your questions are answered, or they become less important to you than they are at the moment.

    As for being friends with the ex, it?s not impossible, but it can be really difficult and for some people it can get in the way of moving on. Perhaps you might want to try not talking to him for a week or so, and see how you feel after that.

    Take care.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you :) that has helped, its just i get good days and i get bad days. I havent spoke to him in nearly a week but he hasnt got hold of me either and sometimes its just really tempting if i want to get hold of him...
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    EmziiChick-x wrote: »
    Thank you :) that has helped, its just i get good days and i get bad days. I havent spoke to him in nearly a week but he hasnt got hold of me either and sometimes its just really tempting if i want to get hold of him...

    I know it's hard but delete his number. It's all about looking after yourself in the long run and I know how tempting it is to text/ring. Also things like facebook and MSN don't help. In fact yesterday I changed my network on facebook to Iceland so I can't look at his page anymore! It hurts but it will make things so much easier for you if you at least cut him out of your life for now. Take care
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah i think i should...I do find it easier when i dont talk to him it just hurts alot when i think of the good times, it makes me miss him and i just want to talk to him about them :(
    Thank you x
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    update

    i keep talking to him when i shouldnt.......
    :(
    I cant stop myself
Sign In or Register to comment.