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rebuilding confidence
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
ok i havent posted in a while as i've been having a bit of a tough time of things and been getting my head straight,
so my girlfriend broke up with me about 6 weeks ago and 2 weeks later started sleeping with a lesbian twice her age, i was her first serious b/f and the first guy she had sex with, she never expressed any interest in women while we were together or hinted that she ever had before. so needless to say it came as a bit of a shock to me when i found out.
this has been a bit of a kick in the balls to my confidence, now i know realistically that i didnt "turn" her or put her off men or anything, but the irrational side of me feels that way almost,
now any time i think of approaching someone new, something stops me, for example this girl who comes into my work she is good looking and has a nice friendly smile and we sometimes make eyes at eachother, the thing that holds me back in this case is that she's about 6'1"-6'2" and i'm only just 5'9", now i've always been taller than my girlfriends and most of them have admitted they liked it best that way, some have gone as far to say that they would not date a shorter man,
now i know the best way to get my confidence is to face my fear, but i worry that another knockback this soon might make things even worse the next time, what do i do?
so my girlfriend broke up with me about 6 weeks ago and 2 weeks later started sleeping with a lesbian twice her age, i was her first serious b/f and the first guy she had sex with, she never expressed any interest in women while we were together or hinted that she ever had before. so needless to say it came as a bit of a shock to me when i found out.
this has been a bit of a kick in the balls to my confidence, now i know realistically that i didnt "turn" her or put her off men or anything, but the irrational side of me feels that way almost,
now any time i think of approaching someone new, something stops me, for example this girl who comes into my work she is good looking and has a nice friendly smile and we sometimes make eyes at eachother, the thing that holds me back in this case is that she's about 6'1"-6'2" and i'm only just 5'9", now i've always been taller than my girlfriends and most of them have admitted they liked it best that way, some have gone as far to say that they would not date a shorter man,
now i know the best way to get my confidence is to face my fear, but i worry that another knockback this soon might make things even worse the next time, what do i do?
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
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Comments
Sounds like you’ve had a pretty tough time of it lately. Dealing with a break-up is never easy, and this seems particularly painful because your ex has found a new partner so quickly. You’ve mentioned that your girlfriend’s now sleeping with a lesbian twice her age. Understandably this is a bit of a surprise to you if she never mentioned this during your relationship. But at the end of the day, her decision isn’t likely to be a result of your relationship. As this article on TheSite.org suggests, she may be experimenting with something new or she may have always felt this way.
Either way, it’s perhaps more beneficial to focus on yourself and how you can move forwards. Everyone deals with the end of relationship at their own pace, and it could be that your reluctance to approach the girl at your work means that you’re not quite ready for a relationship yet. That said, if you think the only thing that’s holding you back is the height difference, then that needn’t be a factor. Women find different things attractive, and I’m sure that for a lot of people, the height wouldn’t even be an issue. You might also find TheSite.org article on boosting your pulling confidence useful.
Take care,
Tash