Likin a new girl

Former Member

Hi there. I've recently just moved out to Murcia, Spain for the 2nd semester of my year abroad for my language degree for back home in England. I've got chatting to a girl who's actually from the same uni as me and has come at the same time (I was in France for the 1st semester, she was in Italy). We never talked properly during the 1st two years at our proper uni and only just got talking now, and I kinda like her after talking to her for quite a bit. It's still quite early because 1) She's only been here a week and 2) She's just come out of a 4 yr relationship. I was wondering if anyone had any tips on how to go about this. Call me old fashioned but I'm not the kinda person who's gonna make a move on her in a club when we're both pissed, I'd actually like to ask her out and see where it would go from there.

Any advice, folks?

Former Member

Hmmm well from my own experience i'd say trying it on with someone who has just come out of a relationship is a bad idea. I guess it depends on how long ago she spilt up and i guess why she did. She's bound to still have feelings for this other bloke and you don't want to part of any rebound malarky ... gets rather messy if that happens.

But that doesn't mean don't talk to her and all that, just take it easy atm i'd say. Keep chatting and see how it goes. Maybe go for lunch to talk about "uni work" or something like that, doesn't have to be dressed up as a date as such.

Anyway good luck

TashJ

Everyone is different in the way they'd like a relationship to begin, but it sounds like you're off to a good start already - talking to her and getting to know her better.

If she's just come out of a four year relationship, she might not want to take things too fast, but as you get to know her likes/dislikes you might want to suggest either a casual activity such as a movie or a coffee or otherwise going to a group event together. If that goes well, you can perhaps ask her out on another date, and so on...

Hope it works out for you!

Former Member

I'd hang fire mate, because if shes anything like me, your in rebound county at present, and in that situ, even if she really likes you, her head prob isnt sorted right out at the minute, so it might not be a good idea.
I say this because fresh out of a 3 year relationship,(well 2/3 months after it ended) got with someon who I really liked, fancied etc etc but just couldnt hack it after a while because I didnt have time to get over the ex before I got with him.if that makes sense.