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Seeking All Advice
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I have never posted anything on anyboard but I really need to get some advice (please if you can't say anything nice in response to my message please just ignore it and keep moving..thanks)
A little over a year ago I met this guy who moved into my small community. He saved me one late weekend evening from a plumbing crisis. When I met him he was so humble and sweet just kind. I immediately enjoyed the conversation we had. And from that moment on we were the best of friends. While getting to know him , he told me that he was legally divorced and had been so for a very long time but he and his wife had not divorced. During this time I got to know his wife and his daughter ( whom he loves more than life). Both he and his wife told me that there was no possibility of them getting back together. They both told me about their past and how he had done alot of unforgivable things due to a drug addiction.
He and I grew very close and an intimate relationship developed, then he later moved into my house. Needless to say that with him living in my house things have become really intense. Also during the time he has been to rehad and has worked on his sobriety, also he has been able to hold down a job which he hadn't been able to do in a while.
Now my problem I am hopelessly in love with this man, and he has decided that we needed to back up and just be friends because he wants to work on his marriage. I think that is a good thing for him because he deserves to be happy after all the work he has done putting his life together again. But in the process of me trying to be supportive and encouraging to him I ma devasted. I feel like my world has been torn apart. I have never been so heart broken. I can't eat, sleep, work. I don't know what to do. I feel like I am some your high school girl with my first heart ache. I want to be mean to him and put him out but he doesnt have anywhere to go right now ( but I don't feel like that is my proble,)
I have stood by him and his family through so many things his drug addiction, him being sick, his brother dying, and so many more things. I loved him in spite of his past, in spite of what others said, in spite of my better judgement. Why can't I make him love me back. This has me stumped. PLEASE IF ANYONE HAS ANY SUGGESTIONS ON HOW TO HEAL A BROKEN HEART AND MOVING ON PLEASE RESPOND OR IF YOU HAVE ANY RESPONSES TO MY MESSAGE PLEASE FEEL FREE TO RESPOND.
THANK
NCBEAUTY4ASHES
A little over a year ago I met this guy who moved into my small community. He saved me one late weekend evening from a plumbing crisis. When I met him he was so humble and sweet just kind. I immediately enjoyed the conversation we had. And from that moment on we were the best of friends. While getting to know him , he told me that he was legally divorced and had been so for a very long time but he and his wife had not divorced. During this time I got to know his wife and his daughter ( whom he loves more than life). Both he and his wife told me that there was no possibility of them getting back together. They both told me about their past and how he had done alot of unforgivable things due to a drug addiction.
He and I grew very close and an intimate relationship developed, then he later moved into my house. Needless to say that with him living in my house things have become really intense. Also during the time he has been to rehad and has worked on his sobriety, also he has been able to hold down a job which he hadn't been able to do in a while.
Now my problem I am hopelessly in love with this man, and he has decided that we needed to back up and just be friends because he wants to work on his marriage. I think that is a good thing for him because he deserves to be happy after all the work he has done putting his life together again. But in the process of me trying to be supportive and encouraging to him I ma devasted. I feel like my world has been torn apart. I have never been so heart broken. I can't eat, sleep, work. I don't know what to do. I feel like I am some your high school girl with my first heart ache. I want to be mean to him and put him out but he doesnt have anywhere to go right now ( but I don't feel like that is my proble,)
I have stood by him and his family through so many things his drug addiction, him being sick, his brother dying, and so many more things. I loved him in spite of his past, in spite of what others said, in spite of my better judgement. Why can't I make him love me back. This has me stumped. PLEASE IF ANYONE HAS ANY SUGGESTIONS ON HOW TO HEAL A BROKEN HEART AND MOVING ON PLEASE RESPOND OR IF YOU HAVE ANY RESPONSES TO MY MESSAGE PLEASE FEEL FREE TO RESPOND.
THANK
NCBEAUTY4ASHES
0
Comments
I'm so sorry to hear about your recent heartbreak. It's no wonder you are finding it so hard to cope right now - you've invested so much time in your relationship with this person and the fact it has now come to an end must be a terrible shock to you. At this stage it's perfectly acceptable to be so upset - to cry, to feel physically stunned, in pain - all of those things.
One of the most important things about healing a broken hard is that word - 'heal' it's important to take care of yourself, let others take care of you and to confide in anyone you really trust. It's also important to give yourself space away from the man you've loved. But all of this takes time and you are likely to go through lots of phases where you feel differently about this.
We have some articles on TheSite that you may find helpful -
There's
Accepting it over
mending a broken heart - I'd also recommend the book written by the same author which is available on various websites -
How To Mend A Broken Heart by Christine Webber - (Hodder and Stoughton, £7.99).
Getting over it
Take good care of yourself x