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Spending time with your OH

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
How much time do you spend with your OHs?
> Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
> Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
> Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
> If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
> Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

Thanks! :)

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You confused me for a moment - I was thinking OH as in alcohol group in organic chemistry...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh sorry!

    OH - Other Half!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Finding it hard. Have just come out of a relationship where I was very independent on account of the fact I couldn't stand to be around him. Am now with someone I want to spend a lot of time with.

    At the moment because it's new and it's winter we are spending a lot of time together. Sometimes I feel a but Squished and suffocated, sometimes I feel a bit ignored and neglected. Depends on my mood. I hope this chages, I hope when summer comes we'll do a bit of stuff on our own or with our own friends.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Curvy_lass wrote: »
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?
    1) Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    2) Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    3) Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    4) If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    5) Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    Thanks! :)

    1) Yep, he always comes out with me and my friends and tbh they're becoming as much his friends as they are mine now and he sees more of them than I do.

    2) We have things we do together, such as we both play poker, pool, snooker fairly seriously, but then we have seperate hobies as well.
    3) At the moment no. Living 250 miles apart is hard and we see each other every fortnight if we're lucky. Hopefully he'll be moving down to me in the summer though and we'll be living together.
    4) One of us would have to quit work, which isn't realistic for either of us at the moment.
    5) Yep, sometimes. Especially if I've had a bad week or I'm missing him and home lots. It's also worse when he's going out with my friends. I miss everyone so much and knowing they're all having fun together without me can really rub it in how far away I am and can hurt and make me jealous.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    In the past, I used to spend lots of time socialising with my OH. We both came from different circles and had different friends. Sometimes we'd go out just us, sometimes with just our friends... as a group, it was mostly 50/50 her friends/my friends... (50% of the times we went out in a group it was her friends and 50% of the times we went out with mine that is, not 50% of the group being her friends and 50% mine). Sorry, I realise that's quite confusing.
    We didn't so much enjoy a hobby together - we had similar interests though, that's what drew us together in the first place.
    I liked the way we did things. We had plenty of time for each other but didn't neglect our respective friends, although it would've been easier if we'd been in the same friendship groups.
    In the future, i'd like to probably spend the same amount of time with a future girlfriend. I felt it worked well, we had plenty of each other but didn't feel crowded.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs? weekends usually
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?) bit of both..i've been introduced to his friends and some of them i've made good friends with now..he knows my uni friends and outside friends but usually socialise seperately i think
    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? we both like films, comedy and music so that just happens naturally
    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? wish it was a tiny bit more but it feels healthy this way
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so. - money for the train journey/petrol
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you? only when i am on the blob but nahh we are cool
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    Not really. I have been "out" with him and his friends when I've been invited, but because we're so far away that doesn't happen anymore. I have tried to make attempts at getting my friends here out on a night out when he's around but it hasn't happened yet.

    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    We have similarish tastes in stuff but different hobbies really. He has his bass guitar (which I tried to get him to teach me but he sucked at teaching :p) and I have my writing.
    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    No. I wish I could see him every day tbh. Atm I see him every other weekend and it's not nearly often enough for my liking.

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    My education, or his career. Neither of which either of us are willing to sacrifice. Once I've finished here I'm going to move in with him and that'll make things a lot better.

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?
    All the time. Especially since I'm usually sitting home on my own with nobody to talk to.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Gah. At the moment we're spending about 24 hours together a week, as we both work 6 day weeks and it's proving impossible to coordinate our midweek days off.

    We tend to take it in turns to visit each other - he's in essex, i'm in London. When we're visiting each other we socialise with the others' friends. We also have mutual friends dotted about whom we occasionally see.

    We haven't made any effort to have joint hobbies - we both like reading, drinking, socialising, comedy, going to films (though not always the same ones!). He is a 'Karate Expert' (his words, not mine) and likes football, weights and cardio. I'm not into that so much.

    I don't feel we spend enough time together, especially as until 6 months ago we were living together and spent most of our time together. If we did want to be together, one of us would have to sacrifice our job, the friends we grew up with, and proximity to our family in order to do that. In order to spend more time together we'd probably have to sacrifice sleep - travelling later, getting up earlier to get to work, things like that.

    I don't get jealous or unhappy about him doing things without me by and large, unless it's patently out of order - him refusing to book a holiday just with me and then happily booking one with me and his friends instead springs to mind.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?

    Every day. We live together with our daughters. However at the moment I'm in England setting up our new home here with the girls, and he's in Sweden finishing his work contract for another three weeks. Longest we've spent apart since we've been together, it's difficult already...

    Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)

    Yep, lots of mutual friends we've been mates with for years and years. How we met. We have our individual friends but the majority are shared, really. Any social time we have these days is time we want to spend together. Looking forward to having my parents' babysitting services when we're settled back here ;)

    Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?

    It's not a conscious effort but we have a lot of similar interests: music, writing, the arts, travel, languages etc etc.

    Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?

    I don't think I could ever spend "enough" time with him. That's puke-worthy but it's true. If I spent every second of the day with him I would still want to be around him more, that's how I feel. I suppose if I spent every second with him I might feel [very] differently! On the other hand, I'm happy to spend time apart too. It's a weird, conflicting kind of feeling. I'd rather be with him, I guess, I don't have to be.

    If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.

    Erm, parenthood :razz: His career, I suppose.

    Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    No. He does his thing, I do my thing, most of our "things" are together. There's no reason to feel jealous... unless one of the things he was doing without me was a person I guess.... ha ha.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Curvy_lass wrote: »
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    Thanks! :)

    1. Not really. His friends hate me and I'm hardly fond of them. My best mate thinks hes a waste of space and my other mates I wouldnt want him to meet too often as most of them are good mates with the lad who begged me to dump him to get with him...
    2. Niether of us have particular hobbies...
    3. At a weekedn yes, during the week no. His bloody work n my bloody college work.
    4.My grades which are already suffering :impissed:
    5. Sort of. Never about other girls but if hes out n Im a bit snappy
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Curvy_lass wrote: »
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    Thanks! :)

    1, we spend most weekends together and some week days if im not too busy with uni.
    2, when we socialise its usually together as all our friends are very close.
    3, I think i should spend more time with him but im too busy with uni atm.
    4, If i were to spend more time with him i would have to give up uni, the fact that he lives about an hour away means that i would have to give up more study time than i would if he lived closer.
    5, No i don't, which is weird as i usually do get a bit jealous if a guy was to go to a party without me, however i really trust him
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Curvy_lass wrote: »
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    Thanks! :)


    Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?) bit of both, we go out sometimes with friends and sometimes seperately.

    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? no conscious choice to have the same hobbies, we do things we enjoy, such as i love going to the footy, and she doesnt.

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? we live together, so everyday.

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so. yes, i'd probably have to give up my job

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you? not at all, sometimes its nice to have a bit of time to myself, and sometimes nice if i go out with the lads without her, same for her if she wants to go and see friends etc...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    >How much time do you spend with your OHs?
    Most of the time as he works from home and im a stay at home parent at the moment
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?) We dont do much socialising at the moment tbh but when we do it can be either, we have seperate friends and joint friends

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? yes plenty
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so. sleeping
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?
    depends if its something supercool that i wish i could do too. I got pissed off when he got to go and see a band i really wanted to see but couldnt cos of the baby - well not pissed off, but a bit grumpy. He wasnt even into that sort of music but just went for the sake of it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs? Usually a few nights a week; more if one of us is ill or having a hard time (which is usually me as I'm just getting over depression and my housemates are driving me up the wall at the moment)

    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)A bit of both; when he stays at mine we'll spend time with my friends, and vice versa. We're careful that we don't come as a package, though - we'll spend time with our friends on our own and together.

    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? We have very different interests but each make an effort to learn from the other. I'm much more into foreign films, while he likes zombie flicks and action films. He's widening his scope of films and I'm learning how to watch a film to relax rather than have to think. He's teaching me about photography and I'm teaching him to paint and to dance. We're different, but it works in our favour.

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?I'd like to spend time together during the day rather than just evenings. It's hard because his days off are the days I work, so we're limited in what we can do together.

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.Probably work - I'd have to change the days I worked which would be hard because of the way my uni hours are distributed over the week

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?
    Only if he blows off previous plans we'd made together to do something else, which happens very rarely. It's important to me that he does things without me; I love the fact that we're two people with two lives rather than two halves of a whole.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Curvy_lass wrote: »
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    Thanks! :)

    1) 3/4 times a week-sometimes a day all at once at weekends
    2.socialise with each others friends, with our own and seperatly
    3. at the moment got no time for hobbying as am working full time and trying to do a NVQ qualification, but he plays in a band and does karate-go to gigs sometimes to watch him, does that count??
    4. at the moment dont see how we could spend more time w each other-am mad about him but need quite a bit of space at the mo 2.
    5.see 4
    6. Nah, I dont get jealous at all-I really trust him. Have got jealous with other boyfs but they turned out to be cheaters, so was right i guess on that score.

    Now what about u Curvy lass? whats brought this on, and I think u should answer your own questions!;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs? We see each other pretty much every day and have done since the start > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)Sometimes we go out with each others friends or soemtimes we have our own time with friend
    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? Hobbie like drinking and clubbing? Then yes > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? yes :)
    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so. Work
    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you? Naaa we see each other everyday so if he wants to do his own thing one time that's cool (and healthy!)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You confused me for a moment - I was thinking OH as in alcohol group in organic chemistry...

    Yeah - I would have expected UA .. for 'uvver 'alf! :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That would've made me think 'Urinalysis' though!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs?

    We live together so I see him everyday, unless one of us has gone away for the weekend.


    Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)

    We socialise together and separately. We have separate friends as well as some friends that we know together, and we spend time with them either together or on our own.


    Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?

    We both like to travel together and we are currently taking German evening classes together, but we also have separate hobbies that we do individually.


    Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?

    Yes.


    If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.

    We would both have to give up our jobs!


    Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    Only if it's something I wish I was doing too, but for whatever reason I can't. For example, if he's gone to see a band or film that I've wanted to see but have been too ill or busy or working at the time.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    //
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    katchika wrote: »
    it would be nice if he took me to meet them seeing as we've been together almost a year.

    I've hardly met any of Rich's friends even though we've been together 15 months (today, in fact :D). It makes me feel a bit funny when he's out with them (which is rare, granted, but it happens) 'cause I don't like texting him as much as I usually would in case his friends all think I'm clingy and controlling. I would love to meet them just to be able to put names to faces etc. I've been invited to the wedding of a guy I've never met, and who Rich says he would make his best man and if I don't meet him before their wedding I'm gonna be really quiet and hating myself for it.

    Ho hum. I'm gonna stop rambling now.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)


    Only met a couple of his friends by accident, so no. He doesn't like doing big social things so never comes out with me and mine. Barely wants to see my family.


    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?

    Although we have quite alot in common with films, and music and food and pursue these things together, He acts and does his own thing alot, so I do my own thing alot

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?

    Couple nights a week- usually like a night until morning kind of deal- or the odd Sat when he's not going out...I think that's okay. He's a very busy guy so I grab whatever time I can get!

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.

    Not me that needs to sacrifice anything really, I go see him when he's free.

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?

    It's been like this since the beginning, so used to it now, but I do get pissed if one of our days gets taken over because he has to go do something
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    1. Pretty much every evening/night and every weekend together - we both work 50 hour weeks and spend rest the time with one another.
    2. Always socialise together, go to exactly the same parties/events as a couple. I like her friends, she likes mine, we look good together so always invited to some great shindigs.
    3. Have exactly the same hobbies so spend all time together - watch the same TV shows, read the same sorta books.
    4. Can't really, spend pretty much all my time with her except when I'm working.
    5. Doesn't apply, never end up doing things separately as always (want to) go to the same things together.

    Makes a nice change from ex's where either (a) living a bit apart, (b) one not always wanting to do the same things social-wise. Been with her less than 3 months but seriously considering getting married.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)
    Sometimes, I've been out a few times with him and his old work mates. Most of the time I'll be out with my mates and he'll be out with his and we will just meet up at the end.

    Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?
    We have seperate hobbies, his is the band he's in and mine is the gym. Although he is finding a new love for the gym after coming a few times with me!

    Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?
    Yeah, we normally see each other about 2 or 3 times a week. More than that and I'd get annoyed with him. Sometimes we can go for a week or so without seeing each other. We just have to fit in days around my uni and placement hours and my part time job and his work and band practices.

    If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    I wouldn't have to sacrifice anything, although at the moment I am putting off doing uni work so we can do things and see each other :rolleyes:

    Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?
    Nope not at all! I never get jelouse with him, even when he has girls stalking him around clubs I just find it funny. And I'm sure he doesn;t get jelouse of things I do. We're good like that :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lankygirl wrote: »
    Now what about u Curvy lass? whats brought this on, and I think u should answer your own questions!;)
    Okay!! Will do :p

    How much time do you spend with your OHs? - not enough!! Well, it's a bit tricky at the moment as it is. He's 200+ miles away, and we only get to see each other for 3 days a month :(


    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?) - I'm trying to get in more with my boyfriends friends, and likewise with him, but we have completely different aged friends (his are in his 30s, mine are in there late teens/early 20s!) but we're doing quite well!

    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? - Not at the minute no, he's into motorbikes etc and I'm into horses, they do have something in common though, HORSEPOWER! BUT he does come down the stables with me, as he has friends there too!

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? - not at the moment, no :(

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.
    - My university degree and that's the last thing he'd want me to do!!

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you? - a little bit, yeah. As much as I deny it, I sulk when he's back home having fun, and I'm stuck at uni not doing much! And I have been jealous of his female friends in the past, but got over it when I realised he was with ME not them :o

    Katikcha - I only used the phrase OH, as thats what most people on forums I know call them! Apologies if I peeved you with my choice of word!!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs? -
    hardy any - grand total of 4 hours this month!


    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?) - When I'm at his we hang around with his friends. He's not here very often and it's usually only for a couple of hours so we don't have time to go out.

    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? - He's too busy for a hobby atm.

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? - no

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so. My life here and move

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you? - a bit, i just worry because he's done some silly stuff when drunk before and at bonfire night he almost got hit by a firework cause his friends were being stupid. I worry about his safety more than anything.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    > Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?)-I don't think any couple could socialise in different groups and last, I share the same friends with the girl I'm seeing now as well as other friends we have.

    > Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies?-Nope, what's the point trying to like something your other half likes when you clearly don't want to. Smacks of desperation if you ask me.

    > Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH?-Nope, I'm in uni, she isn't.

    > If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so.- spending time getting drunk. That's about it.

    > Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you?-Nope.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How much time do you spend with your OHs? n Every damn day!

    Do you socialise together or not (perhaps different friends?) Yup. His friends are nice and they usually come over here. He's gone out a a couple times with my friends but apperantly girls nights dont interest him too much. Wonder why!


    Do you make a conscious to have a joint hobby or do you pursue separate hobbies? We are both pretty lazy people. I knit or watch tv or play on the computer, he watches tv, plays or works on the computer. Hes moved some computers downstairs so we can pretend to hang out sometimes. We're always in the same room but usually doing different things.


    Do you feel you spend enough time with your OH? Plenty


    If you wanted to spend more time with your OH, what would you have to sacrifice in order to do so. I don't think we could spend more time together


    Do you ever get jealous or unhappy if your OH does things without you? Only when he goes out to eat at a place for lunch at work he knows I've been wanting to go! Cuz then he'll go there multiple times at work and gets sick of it when I want to go. Fucker :p
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