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(unintentionally) funny foreign "english" phrases
Indrid Cold
Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
in General Chat
1. Cocktail lounge, Norway:
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
2. At a Budapest zoo:
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS.
IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD
ON DUTY.
3. Doctor's office in Rome:
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
4. Information booklet about using a hotel air
conditioner. Japan:
COOLES AND HEATES: IF YOU WANT CONDITION OF WARM AIR
IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF.
5. In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE
THE MANAGER.
6. On the grounds of a Nairobi private school:
NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.
7. In Aamchi Mumbai restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.
8. The best! In a Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.
9. Hotel, Japan:
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
10. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a
Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS
RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS,
ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT
THURSDAY.
11. Hotel, Zurich:
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF
THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM,
IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS
PURPOSE.
12. Advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.
13. A laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE
AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
14. Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia:
TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE
NO MISCARRIAGES.
15. Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?
16. The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.
17. Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
18. In a Japanese cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY
BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
2. At a Budapest zoo:
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS.
IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD
ON DUTY.
3. Doctor's office in Rome:
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
4. Information booklet about using a hotel air
conditioner. Japan:
COOLES AND HEATES: IF YOU WANT CONDITION OF WARM AIR
IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF.
5. In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE
THE MANAGER.
6. On the grounds of a Nairobi private school:
NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.
7. In Aamchi Mumbai restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.
8. The best! In a Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.
9. Hotel, Japan:
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
10. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a
Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS
RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS,
ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT
THURSDAY.
11. Hotel, Zurich:
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF
THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM,
IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS
PURPOSE.
12. Advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.
13. A laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE
AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
14. Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia:
TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE
NO MISCARRIAGES.
15. Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?
16. The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.
17. Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.
18. In a Japanese cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY
BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.
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