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She made a mistake? hmmmm
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Let me start off by saying that I have been dating a lot lately.
There is this one girl I have been seeing who I wasn't that interested in at first, but as time went on I was thinking that maybe I should give her a chance.
I met her in a bar. The first time I approached her, we chatted for a bit. i was going to leave soon and I asked for her number. She was like "I don't meet people in bars." So I talke dto her a little more and when I had her laughing again - I was like "I better go before you start liking someone you met in a bar." So I bolted. The next weekend, I bumped into her again at the same place and she gave me her #.
So anyway, this girl and I have had multiple dates. I have taken her to dinner, drinks, a show... etc. This is over a period of 1-2 months. She has mentioned many times "that I have good qualities" and things of that nature.
Last weekend, we hung out both Friday and Saturday night. We even talked about possibly seeing more of each other.
We get back to my place, I sat on my couch and she on the loveseat. It wasn't long before she got up, sat down beside me, and the next thing I know she is on my lap, making out heavily.
The next night, we went out again, and she was very touchy-feely once again. I purposely sat back and let her make the moves.
It was like 3 AM Sunday morning, she was laying on my couch. I told her I was headed to bed and she could join if she wanted- or I would fetch her a blanket to sleep on the couch. She seemed indecisive so I just went to bed. When I woke she was gone, which was cool...
So, fast forward 2 days later. I call the girl to say hello and make small talk. Somehow we get on the conversation of what transpired on the weekend and she flat out said she "made a mistake".
That really blew me away. I mean I let this make all the moves only to turn around and say what she did like I somehow pressured her?
I told her that this would be pretty much it for us and I don't understand.
Then she breaks out the whole relationship talk.... uggh. Claiming "I am not ready for a relationship." I am just sitting there wondering where that even came from!
I was like "can't we just go back to enjoying each other's company?" and "why do we have to label it?"
I just can't bring myself to hang with a girl who claims making out with me is a MISTAKE. So I told her to go away....
I just find the whole thing very peculiar.
Her body languages says one thing and her mouth speaks another...
There is this one girl I have been seeing who I wasn't that interested in at first, but as time went on I was thinking that maybe I should give her a chance.
I met her in a bar. The first time I approached her, we chatted for a bit. i was going to leave soon and I asked for her number. She was like "I don't meet people in bars." So I talke dto her a little more and when I had her laughing again - I was like "I better go before you start liking someone you met in a bar." So I bolted. The next weekend, I bumped into her again at the same place and she gave me her #.
So anyway, this girl and I have had multiple dates. I have taken her to dinner, drinks, a show... etc. This is over a period of 1-2 months. She has mentioned many times "that I have good qualities" and things of that nature.
Last weekend, we hung out both Friday and Saturday night. We even talked about possibly seeing more of each other.
We get back to my place, I sat on my couch and she on the loveseat. It wasn't long before she got up, sat down beside me, and the next thing I know she is on my lap, making out heavily.
The next night, we went out again, and she was very touchy-feely once again. I purposely sat back and let her make the moves.
It was like 3 AM Sunday morning, she was laying on my couch. I told her I was headed to bed and she could join if she wanted- or I would fetch her a blanket to sleep on the couch. She seemed indecisive so I just went to bed. When I woke she was gone, which was cool...
So, fast forward 2 days later. I call the girl to say hello and make small talk. Somehow we get on the conversation of what transpired on the weekend and she flat out said she "made a mistake".
That really blew me away. I mean I let this make all the moves only to turn around and say what she did like I somehow pressured her?
I told her that this would be pretty much it for us and I don't understand.
Then she breaks out the whole relationship talk.... uggh. Claiming "I am not ready for a relationship." I am just sitting there wondering where that even came from!
I was like "can't we just go back to enjoying each other's company?" and "why do we have to label it?"
I just can't bring myself to hang with a girl who claims making out with me is a MISTAKE. So I told her to go away....
I just find the whole thing very peculiar.
Her body languages says one thing and her mouth speaks another...
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Comments
All I can say is maybe she got scared, yes ok it was all started by her but sometimes your just enojying yourself too much then you sort of wake up.
It sounds bonkers I know, my ex got exposed to alot of this kinda behaviour from myself.
Youre best just talking to her, not appling any pressure (not that you are now from the sounds of it) and not getting mad or anything
I'm sorry to hear this Peace Pipe. Was she the girl you were really happy about?
I don't understand the move either... I mean, I have backtracked before on sleeping with a guy too soon and then feeling like it was a mistake, but not just making out... Unless, how heavy was the making out? Was it an 'everything but penetration' session?
And even the times that I had backtracked, it definitely wasn't because the guy had pressured me, but because, the day after, I felt like there was a lag between my actions and the level of intimacy with the guy. Like I had gotten ahead of myself - like I had failed to protect my vulnerabilities.
So I don't think she meant she 'made a mistake' as a way to make you feel responsible in any way.
On a side note... You offered her the couch? Hmmm.... Gentlemen offer the lady the bed, in their company, or a cab fare home. Couch surfing is detrimental to romance. My new guy walked me home at midnight after I acted all wishy-washy. I know, once again, a system that works to the advantage of women. Just saying though, we do appreciate these kinds of gestures.