I Love You

Former Member

Right how long do you wait to say it ?

One of the things I really dislike is people saying it without meaning it and NBN1 actually say 'i love you' the other day and it's really really really put me off him.

I've known him like, three weeks? Maybe four ..

So why do people say it if they don't mean it?

Former Member

Nbn1?

Former Member

Was he drunk or on drugs when he said it?

Former Member

JustThinking..X wrote: »

So why do people say it if they don't mean it?

Sometimes people say it because their feelings are so strong for a person. I know it may seem off puting but you can't really be too harsh on the lad.

Former Member

Realisitically i would wait till you actually you mean it to say it. But some people get married after only 6 weeks because they think they are in Love, others take years to feel it.

Maybe he just really does like you... maybe he is saying what he thinks you want to hear...

Former Member

JustThinking..X wrote: »

Right how long do you wait to say it ?

till it feels right

Former Member

JustThinking..X wrote: »

One of the things I really dislike is people saying it without meaning it and NBN1 actually say 'i love you' the other day and it's really really really put me off him.

I've known him like, three weeks? Maybe four ..

So why do people say it if they don't mean it?

Maybe he did mean it. Love is a subjective feeling and some people reckon they can fall in love straight away. I understand you being a touch freaked out by it, but don't run for the hills just yet...

Former Member

With my first boyfriend, it took me about 6 months to tell him. With my second, I told him after about a month:rolleyes: , didn't go down too well, but I was actually in love with him after that short a period of time.

Some people are just comfortable with using it straight away and some are not. I have to admit if a new boyfriend said it to me it would really freak me out!

Former Member

lipsy wrote: »

Was he drunk or on drugs when he said it?

Nope he doesn't do drugs and rarely drinks !

Former Member

xlittlexstarx wrote: »

I really think it depends on their feelings as to when they say it or not. I was with a guy for quite a few months before he said it, but unfortunately I never felt the same way. But my current boyfriend told me after only a few weeks that he felt that he was falling in love with me, and I did feel the same way. And at first I was worried that maybe he didn't mean it or that we were just caught up in the moment or something, but that was three years ago now so I guess there must have been some truth in it

If it's made you feel uncomfortable maybe you should mention it to him and find out whether he really does love you, or whether he just has a strong 'like' for you, or whether he said it because he thought that's what you wanted to hear?

Yeah I could speak to him

It was a bit uncomfortable it was sweet of him but just a bit random he doesn't even know me properly yet. And I didn't know what to say back to be honest.

I thought it was just a one off but hes started putting it in texts and said it on the phone .. ?

I think he just wants a girlfriend and the whole lovey-dovey package but thats not really what I'm after at the moment but I do like him

Former Member

JustThinking..X wrote: »

I think he just wants a girlfriend and the whole lovey-dovey package but thats not really what I'm after at the moment but I do like him

This sounds very familiar. A few years back when I was sort of 17 or 18, I was like that and I remember telling girls I loved them after about three weeks. So embarrasing! Of course I know now that I didn't love them. It was lust and just all those crazy emotions you get when you first meet a great girl. I've learnt not to say that sort of stuff these days - even if I feel like it. What I didn't know at that age was how much of a turn off saying stuff like that too soon was to girls! Don't be too hard on him - obviously you need to talk to him and explain that you're not looking to get too loved up too quickly etc, but don't just ditch him. His heart is in the right place, he obviously likes you a lot - he's obviously just over excited, is saying what he thinks you want to hear, and obviously just doesn't realise it's actually a bit of a turn off...

Former Member

That was really helpful cheers !

Former Member

I said it the other day to my bf we've been together nearly 2 months but seen each other everyday and spent nearly every night together, so our relationship has progressed really quickly. I was scared about saying it and then we were just laying together in bed and i felt so happy it slipped out but i meant it but it's not a phrase i'd use with him every day i want to keep the "i love you" as a special phrase kinda thing

Former Member

I hate it too, I only say it if I mean it. If the other person says it quickly (even in a jokey way) then it's just gonna dilute the special moment when you feel it and it actually means something :grump:

Former Member

For me it usually takes a while...usually a couple of months.

Yeah, girls hate me for that reason. :-/

Former Member

I very nearly said it back to him last night in a drunken state but I'm glad I didnt !

Former Member

PRETTYgreenEYES wrote: »

I said it the other day to my bf we've been together nearly 2 months but seen each other everyday and spent nearly every night together, so our relationship has progressed really quickly. I was scared about saying it and then we were just laying together in bed and i felt so happy it slipped out but i meant it but it's not a phrase i'd use with him every day i want to keep the "i love you" as a special phrase kinda thing

I said it to Rich (and meant it) after about 3-4 weeks . But our relationship is...um....special, to say the least . And we were like bestest friends for months beforehand, so it all went BAMBAMBAM.

I have had it said to me after about a week before now and that was in a situation where I had literally only known him for about a week. Then again he did turn out to be a complete dickhead, only after one thing (I guess that's relatively obvious...). But I fell for it, because I was young and vulnerable. Blah.

Former Member

nbn1?