why do boys do it?

Former Member

why is it that whenever boys get stressed about something, they distance themselves?

my boyfriend has 4 tough exams this week and i've hardly seen him/spoken to him unless i make the effort first, and when i do call he doesn't say much and sounds really miserable. i wouldn't mind but i have exams too, and i need a bit of love too!
it's like he's focusing solely on his exams, and forgotten all about me.

am i being selfish?
:chin:

Former Member

He has exams, which means he's busy - which is why you've probably hardly seen him.

Former Member

nahnah wrote: »

why is it that whenever boys get stressed about something, they distance themselves?

Hun i wish i knew the answer two of my exes have done it now. i just dont think lads like to talk about problems or things they are stressed about its just not a male thing

Former Member

give him a break! he's got exams and he's stressed out. he probably wants to focus on them...

this is nearly as bad as the thread with the girl worrying about her boyfriend not having called her by 12 when he said he'd phone at 11.

Former Member

Addict wrote: »

give him a break! he's got exams and he's stressed out. he probably wants to focus on them...

this is nearly as bad as the thread with the girl worrying about her boyfriend not having called her by 12 when he said he'd phone at 11.

:yes: I agree, he has exams. It doesnt mean he loves you any less just because he is focusing on his exams. Just chill out and let him get thru his exams.

:thumb:

Former Member

It depends how you cope with exams. I tend to distance myself when i'm stressed. It's just for a week. I've just had my AS levels and i've been busy revising and stuff so i've not been able to talk to my boyfriend as much. Sometimes you have to put something else first. Give him a break.

Former Member

Ok ok I get it,
and I am thoroughly ashamed of myself :P

**helen**

Aww, just think after these exams are over you will both be celebrating and if your boyfriend has had the space he needs to get through them, then no doubt he will be gagging to have some quality time with you. Try and chill out with other friends and family if you can for now. Good luck *hugs*

Former Member

nahnah wrote: »

why is it that whenever boys get stressed about something, they distance themselves?

Clamming up is what most men do. You need to get used to it. Once he has his issues sorted out, he will be back to normal so just give him space and understanding.

Have a read of "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". Its a very useful guide to successful communication between the sexes and explains why members of the opposite sex behave the way they do.

Former Member

Addict wrote: »

give him a break! he's got exams and he's stressed out. he probably wants to focus on them...

this is nearly as bad as the thread with the girl worrying about her boyfriend not having called her by 12 when he said he'd phone at 11.

:yes: I don't actually 'get' the problem here.

Former Member

oh well

Former Member

We're men. It's what we do. When things get tough, (such as at exam time) we keep our distance from everyone and everything else, and focus on our goal. In this case, he is focusing on passing those exams. As for whether you're being selfish... only slightly. Nothing is worse to a man than a girlfriend who needs attention once every five minutes. Let him finish his exams, then normal service will resume.