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I need some FIRE in our sex life!HELP!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hello!
Okay, me and my boyfriend have sex very often and it is good, but its always the same(kind of). When we first started sleeping 2gether we went 2 a cabin and tried out loads of different positions which was fun and exciting and got us both going. Now we've not been there in a while and we're doing the same thing all the time. I'm not complaining, it is good but i want something AMAZING! We're going back 2 this cabin soon so any suggestions? Positions? Erotic sex acts? Anything 2 get things a bit hotter?!
Thanx again
Luv y'all
CHEEKY*
Sex, drugs & rock'n'roll
Speed, weed & birth control
Lifes a bitch & then u die
So fuck the world & lets get high
Okay, me and my boyfriend have sex very often and it is good, but its always the same(kind of). When we first started sleeping 2gether we went 2 a cabin and tried out loads of different positions which was fun and exciting and got us both going. Now we've not been there in a while and we're doing the same thing all the time. I'm not complaining, it is good but i want something AMAZING! We're going back 2 this cabin soon so any suggestions? Positions? Erotic sex acts? Anything 2 get things a bit hotter?!
Thanx again
Luv y'all
CHEEKY*
Sex, drugs & rock'n'roll
Speed, weed & birth control
Lifes a bitch & then u die
So fuck the world & lets get high
0
Comments
Have u any advice on wot different things 2 try?
Love Cheeky*
- watching a hard core porn vid together
- making a vid of ourselves and watching it together
- doing it in front of a mirror
- getting pissed and telling each other our deepest fantasies (first make sure you both understand that far out fantasies are usually not things that people would ever do for real - i.e. they're not a threat to the relationship. This one can go badly wrong if the relationship isn't really solid and trusting.)
- when giving him a blow-job - alternate with mouthfuls of hot and cold drinks
- have a row, tears etc, then make up again (but don't do this too often!)
- anal sex - the tops, if you both like it. You probably won't at first, it usually requires tons of patience, practice and communication as well as lubrication. But when you have your first anal orgasm you'll know it was worthwhile. Get aids tested beforehand.
- rimming, esp.69
- golden showers (drink tons of beer/cider first, do it in the bath)
- you're in a public place, talking about what you want to do with each other, getting aroused...but you can't act on it. So you both go (separately) to the loo and wank. Make sure you get your hands good and messy, and don't wash. You come back and suck each other's fingers clean! (Ok, sounds gross but it was BRILLIANT)
- you've sharing a room with friends (e.g. staying over after a party or whatever). You have sex in the dark, completely silently. No giggling, or rustling, nothing. If you can orgasm it's agony, but kind of more intimate than usual and very sexy - makes you feel that you're really turning each other on. Trying to communicate in the dark just by feel and monitoring each other's breathing is really lovely. (But if you can't orgasm it's a bit crap.)
- g-spot massage. Amazing for her if you get it right, but can be a challenge!
- bondage. I don't like it, but lots of people swear by it.
- rim him/suck his balls while you give him a hand-job. (Maybe more fun for him than you, but he'll owe you big time afterwards!)
- put your finger in his bum when you're shagging, pull it out as he comes. Brings tears to the eyes, but in a good way! (The Spanish do this with hankies etc, if you believe their films!)
- make him last as long as possible by giving him a very very long, slow hand-job, interspersed with little bursts of normal sex, sucking or whatever. Try to keep the activity constant, but without him actually coming. (Ok, some guys won't hold out, but that's a different issue!) When he eventually comes it will be more intense than ever.
- bit of an obvious one this, but it's often my favourite position: you're lying on your side, knees drawn up under your chin, in a semi-foetal position. He's kneeling, with one knee either side of you. Good for him because he can watch his cock going in and out of you, and he gets a terrific view of your bum, and he gets really deep. Good for you because he gets really deep and he can play with your clit and/or anus at the same time. Oh, and he can play with your breasts really easily too. And he can gather you in his arms, rub your back, stroke your head, whatever, and make you feel all warm and loved. In fact, you run out of hands with this one. A good variation on this is to keep your bottom leg (i.e. the one which is against the bed) straight. He'll get even deeper.
Shit, I'm feeling all horny now, and I have tons of work to do!
Have fun, let me know if you want more detail on any of the above.
P.S. I'm assuming that the fundamental things are OK, i.e. you've got good communication, privacy, you're relaxed and he's not coming too quickly? The last point can be the biggest stumbling block of all!
Thanx 4 ur "plentiful" advice Starfish. I've tried a couple of these things, like the finger-up-his-arse thing, which REALLY turned him on! I know we've not been doing it long(about a month now) but u'd b surprised at how fast we've moved and how many positions we've tried in this little time. There is a problem though. U've obviously not read my topic "He cums too quickly" but he does! Any advice about that? Cause when i'm starting 2 have fun he does it! So i've never had the chance 2 orgasm with him, its over 2 quick. Dont get me wrong, he is GOOD at it!
Thanx
Luv y'all
Cheeky*
He needs to develop the muscle which he uses to stop himself pissing when he's really busting to go. He can tense it any time - at the bus stop or in class. When he's close to coming he should tense it, screw up his eyes and think about something really unsexy, e.g his granny in the nude.
Another thing (more effective perhaps) is to hold the base of his cock (either of you can do it) between thumb and index finger and squeeze hard on the tube that carries the spunk - you can feel it running up the underside of his cock. Do it as soon as the urge to come begins, and hold on tight whilst thinking about granny or whatever until the crisis is past!
If you can use either of these techniques (or any others) to overcome that initial urge to come, the urge should lessen a bit and become easier to control.
Practice makes perfect - so encourage him to keep at it, but without making him feel that it's a big problem. If he starts feeling tense or inadequate neither of you will be too happy. Keep some humour in the situation.
To even up the orgasm score a bit, try going on top, but don't move up and down. Play with your clit while he lies still. Time it right and you might even get the magical simultaneous orgasm - tho actually most people reckon that's highly overrated and only happens in movies. (I reckon it's more fun for each of you to concentrate on your own orgasm one at a time, while the other one enjoys the display of pleasure!)
Good luck!
Starfish
CM
Besides StarFish's good stuff howabout...
Get him to masturbate before you start sex - take some of the edge of his libido. You can watch/get involved/catch it on yourself (I have been told spunk is good for papier mache, but I don't quite beleive it).
Do it in a hot bath. Having hot balls will delay his orgasm, this worked well for me when I was younger.
DO NOT put pressure on him. It will only make things worse. When following the suggestions above, try not to let him know you're tackling his ejaculation thing, just act as though you're doing it for fun.
Incidentally SF's muscular things are called KEGEL exercises and they work on the PC muscle. They will also help him keep control of his bladder when he's old and doddery, and they're essential for women to - especially if they will have/have had children.
If he can get an erection shortly after his orgasm it shouldn't be too much of a problem if you're a little patient. Get him to touch/lick/massage you during his soft periods. My current g/f really likes lyng down on her front and having me stroke my balls up and down her back, buttocks, neck etc.
Let us know how you get on (any chance of some pictures ?).
Luck
How often do you see (in the carnal sense) each other ? If it's not too often, it may help if ups his masturbating sessions over the few days before you get together.
Overall though, I think the best thing may be for him to age 20 years or so.
lol
Thanks 4 that advice,Firmhand.
We see each other practically every day. Every now and again there is a day where i dont c him, but that doesnt happen often.
Dont get me wrong, i love him 2 pieces, he's the greatest guy i've ever met, but this cumming-2-soon thing is starting 2 get annoying.
I feel bad cause i know its not his fault. 2day he came 4 times, and it never lasted long any of those times. Hopefully things will get better in time, but if they dont i'll have 2 live with it. I love him 2 much 2 let something like this get in the way of our relationship.
I'll try some of the things u suggested.
Luv Cheeky*
NB: this is not a serious suggestion
Luck
I heard that if you wear more than one condom its a lot easier 4 them 2 slip off while ur having sex...so b careful if u try it & make sure he checks - cos he might not feel them slip off until its 2 late.
Luck