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relationship with parents
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
What's yours like? Mines pretty crap. My dad annoys me and my mums always at her boyfriends. When i'm away from home i dont think about them/miss them or feel the need to ring them. Kinda sad really.
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I get on alright with my mum though.
my dad doesn't live with us anymore so we have sort of drifted apart, we do get along but he annoys the hell out of me because as we have drifted our morals and lifestyles have changed so when ever we see eachother our two worlds collide lol
my step-dad - always been good, he's like a dad to me and he's been my step-dad for around 12 years. i used to show more affection towards him but i don't seem to anymore.
my dad - my parents have been divorced since i was about 6 and since the age of 9 i haven't lived with him. he moved about 6 hours down south about 8 years ago now and since then i've only seen him about twice a year (more if there are funerals etc
my step-mum - my dad has only been married to her for ooh, a year today! but they've been together about 9 years. never really spent much time with her. she's nice but i'll never see her as a motherly figure. i sent her a mothers day card (after much consideration) - but got no thank you back off either my dad or her. so i won't be sending one in the future! :thumb:
When my dad's drunk though he's a pain in the ass.
Have always gotten on well with my step-dad. Even though he supports Man Utd, poor thing :no:
Like others have said I think when you move away and your not in each others way all the time things improve :P
I generally get on better with Mum, but if she's in a bad mood she states her point, and lets it lie, or goes to bed and sleeps it off. She doesn't take it out on people unnecessarily.
If it wasn't for the fact I have three years left of a degree to finish and a horse to keep, I would seriously be considering taking him up on the clearing out thing. As it is, I have to try yet again at the impossible task of being good enough for him. :yeees:
My dad's not been well at all recently, and my Mam is saying he'll be fine and that. I dunno, that's what Mam's are supposed to say isn't it? I know it sounds weird, but I almost died when I was born and I think they'd maybe have expected a bit more from me because of that. I'd give my right ball to make my parents proper proud of me before they go, whenever that might be. I think I made my Mam proud when I helped my Granny just before she died, but that was 7/8 years ago now and I can't really do much else right nowadays. I'm a bit of a mess justnow, I don't have a job and I've fucked up a good few times in the past and let them down. I know they're quite old fashioned and I'm not so, but I only really think of myself and try and make myself happy and I haven't really cared what they think.
I made up with them at Christmas time after about a year without contact, but I can feel myself getting a bit de-attached again. I love them so much though, there's people out there without a family at all and I know I should be more appreciative.
Calming down on the cider might help a bit too, heh
Thing is that I have a great relationship wit hmy parents, yet I have those same feelings. Point is that I know that when I *do* pick up the phone, they are pleased to hear from me, when I *need* them they are there. What more can I ask?
When someones in a bad mood, we will fight really nastily and it's just awful. My parents can get quite aggressive, and i will fight with them like i would someone my own age. They're not adverse to giving me a proper good smack either :yeees:
I can't talk nice to them, but I do love them. I've just forgotten on how to show them the respect I had when I was wee. I think it's because they don't scare me anymore.
I don't have anything in common with them apart from old memories when I was wee. It's extremely diffcult to explain but I know I don't deserve them and they deserve better than me for a daughter most of the time.
I'm kinda like that too sometimes. More with my dad.
when my dad was alive it sounds cliche but i was very much 'daddy's little girl', we had our ups and downs because of the brain tumour that changed his personality. sometimes i just think to myself what a brilliant dad he would have been had he not gotten the tumour. he doted on me and my brother, he used to work in london and brought me home teddies and kinder eggs and i ran through a scary dark alley when i was small just to meet him from the train station, i miss those days
my soon to be stepdad..we get on okay, he doesn't really say much and sometimes i wish he'd try and talk to me more cuz i miss my dad but he its unrealistic to think of him as any sort of replacement
:yes: Definatly same here. Same with the siblings. I've always had a good relationship with my dad though. My mom was the sensible one, if there ever was a problem she would be the one to say, well you need to do this to change it. I would get mad and we fought almost every day. My dad was just the one to give me a hug and say everything will be alright. When I'm down, when something goes wrong, when I just want something he always goes... *hug* "And what do I always say?" Me: "Because my papa always takes care of his nana"
Awwwww
But definatly once I didn't spend day in and day out with them, every relationship has improved. Though I still get cranky and bitchy when a weekend with them becomes too long
EXACTLY. i think i'd get on much better with mummy if i wasn't so financially dependent on her. can't wait to go to university in october because our good times tend to be when we've had some alone time in between!
daddy....well i'm not uberly impressed with him at the moment because of boyfriend issues et cet but we get on pretty well generally.
to be fair though i'm fundamentally incredibly proud of my parents and grateful. especially my mum, who's sacrificed a lot for my brothers and i. even though she does drive me actually insane at times :banghead:
Heh, my folks still scare me. But I tell them what they want to hear, which I wouldn't really recommend. They think I've got a new job and all that, cause it's easier than having to put up with daily phone calls nagging me to get off my arse. That's a disgusting way to treat parents though, I'll really regret shit like this one day, cause I know deep down they've my best interests at heart. Be pretty amazed if your mam wasn't proud of you though.
Jesus, it's like I'm 23 though and my mother still speaks to me the same way she did when I was 15. She phoned me the other night and asked what I was doing, told her I was watching the football with a couple of beers and a chinese. All I got was a moan about where did I get the money to do that if I didn't have a job, and it's like ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHH! I'd give my left ball for her to have a little faith in me.
I was actually thinking about this today because at the pub my friend said 'my Mum said if i get my lip pierced she'll kick me out' and i was like...'really?!' and she said yes...I can't imagine parents who would kick you out, even if i'd done something really terrible never mind just getting a piercing. Just made me think.
Good of you to send a mothers' day card in the 1st place. I hate the way so many divorces end with the kids having to be the mature ones.
Thank god! Everyone else seems to hate their parents. Glad there are some parent-child relationships that work.
As for my parents, I love them, but I have no idea what they want from me & whatever I do seems to disappoint them. I get on better with them since I moved out, but they drive me insane cos we're complete opposites in everything, I don't understand them, they don't understand me, & when I try to talk to them... :banghead: I'm honestly convinced that my dad has no feelings. Maybe he's a robot :chin: that would explain it.
They do try to be good parents, but I feel like I'm from a different world from them. Maybe they're lying to me & I'm actually an alien. That would explain a lot :chin:
As for my real dad, fuck knows what's going on there. Spent ages trying to get up the courage to contact him (didn't wanna upset my parents, etc), then eventually I did, he replied (after 5 months!), so I wrote him again. No reply yet :banghead: Parents!!
Am seriously re-considering ever having kids after reading this discussion.
My mum on the other hand, I think she's a bitch. She doesn't care about how others feel, only what's best for her. She never accepts a different opinion than her own, whenever I disagree on something it's because I'm "too young to know how the world works", but if I agree it's because I'm "older now and maturing".
Sadly I need her, and this is the only reason I've not kicked her out of my life yet...
haha, i was kinda thinking that too at first! i didnt realise it was so common to not get on with your parents. mine have always been awesome, hehe.
I guess you also have to bear in mind what the last kid-parent interaction was. Yesterday what I saw of Mum she was really nice, what I saw of dad he was an arse, so that's what came across in my post.
He's apologised now though, so it's being forgotten.