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Dont know what to do about him.

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
I have a friend, who lies, a lot. I used to think the world of him and couldnt understand why our friends were always slagging him off, moaning about him, calling him a mug and never believing him. Until i found out that he lies all the time. Its wrecking our friendship.

He used to involve me in some lies, and if people dont believe him he gets VERY angry at them for disbeving him calling them bad friends and he gets soooooooooo mad at them and tells me how upset he is at them-even though he admits its bull!

Now, im getting concerned, he told my fella he has lung cancer and had to go to docs on wednesday. He then came out on the wednesday when he was reminded about how he had to go 'doctors' he said he couldnt be bothered... hes acting perfectly normal and he came out with that comment months ago.

He's been lying about having a job for 3 months now. He lies about why he doenst want to come out, he lies about where he is, who hes with, what hees been up to, what he has to do, how he feels... we always find some bit of evidence to prove his lies-hes terrible at backing himself up!

How can he lie about everything?

Its wrecking our relationship hes losing all his friends, and hes going to lose me i dont know what to do about it. if i tell him to stop lying he'll only get angry at me!

TBh i think i know why he lies - hes scared thats all. I dont know how to help him.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont know what I`d do. Youre obviously a good friend for sticking it out so long. Im not sure I could be so understanding. It must be very frustrating and irritating.
    If you type ` compulsive lying` into google, it comes up with loads of links which might be of help.
    :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Rainbow Brite... Thanks but i wouldnt call myself a good friend im getting very frustrated and do think nasty things which makes me very upset that im thinking unfriendly stuff!

    I was thinking about looking up comulsive lying but didnt want to label him as that, but maybe i should start looking into whether he does have a problem.

    Random question - Holloway, is that where Royal holloway uni is? IOf so - whats it like to live in holloway?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by lil_minx
    Rainbow Brite... Thanks but i wouldnt call myself a good friend im getting very frustrated and do think nasty things which makes me very upset that im thinking unfriendly stuff!

    I was thinking about looking up comulsive lying but didnt want to label him as that, but maybe i should start looking into whether he does have a problem.

    Random question - Holloway, is that where Royal holloway uni is? IOf so - whats it like to live in holloway?
    I think any friend who is like that would test you to your limits. If someone is lying all the time with no rhyme or reason for it, apart from out of habit, then I would say they were a compulsive liar, but then again, im not a psychologist and ive not met your friend.

    random answer I dont really live in Holloway, Its meant as a joke, the infamous holloway womens prison. Never mind. Noone ever gets my sense of humour.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Confront him

    if hes a good friend it'll do the trick, if not then you know he's not a good friend.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This reminds me of someone I know. An ex got to know him by being on the same course as him. He constantly spouted bullshit. It sounded plausible at the time, but he would always either contradict himself, or give a totally diffferent account of the same event, or slip up and reveal whatever he was talking aobut to be blown out of all proportion. She used to make it like a sport to get him talking, then spot the differences a few days later when getting him to talk about it again. He was alright, and nothing he said was hurtful or harmed anyone, but it was all about projecting an image of himself, and making himself important, or the centre of attention.
    My Dad also used to know someone who spouted all sorts of things, such as playing polo with Prince Charles, etc. My Dad thought it highly unlikely.
    Both my ex, and my Dad, talked about the people they knew in the same way. :)

    Mr_Wobble ;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by rainbow brite


    random answer I dont really live in Holloway, Its meant as a joke, the infamous holloway womens prison. Never mind. Noone ever gets my sense of humour.

    Lol ooh theres a place called Holloway wanted to know a bit about it for various reasons!

    I guess ill have to confront him :( Hes not doing himself any favours what so ever, and knowing the stubbon bloke that he is, full of pride etc he wont take it well, really dont want to have to talk about it to him. Think ill have to

    Thanks everyone..xx
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