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Anybody want to vent or chat about anything? w/c 01.12.25

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Comments

  • PetiteQuarkPetiteQuark Posts: 114 The Mix Convert
    Owen wrote: »
    PetiteQuark wrote: »
    Ech0 wrote: »
    @Nemuritai I am so sorry to hear that. It sounds like things feel really heavy right now. I’m here to listen if you would like to talk about it.

    Im rlly sick, almost 40deg fever, took paracetamol and it is 39.4c, i was gonna go to the doctor at 7pm to get it checked out and fot reassurance but as my normal gp was closed i had an appointment somewhere far, and my mum didn't take me and just yelled at me instead

    Hey @PetiteQuark it sounds like you’ve not been feeling well lately and it’s understandable that you’d be feeling overwhelmed, especially when you’re concerned about what might be causing your symptoms. I see you’ve had some great reassurance so far but if you are still worried about it, getting advice from a medical professional is a great idea. You could reach out to NHS 111 by calling them or clicking on this link:https://111.nhs.uk/. They will be able to offer you support for your symptoms.

    Its ok now im alot less panicky now i suppose its because i stopped taking antidepressants for like a week but im back on them now and im alot less panicked and more logical now.
  • PetiteQuarkPetiteQuark Posts: 114 The Mix Convert
    Owen wrote: »
    PetiteQuark wrote: »
    Ech0 wrote: »
    @Nemuritai I am so sorry to hear that. It sounds like things feel really heavy right now. I’m here to listen if you would like to talk about it.

    Im rlly sick, almost 40deg fever, took paracetamol and it is 39.4c, i was gonna go to the doctor at 7pm to get it checked out and fot reassurance but as my normal gp was closed i had an appointment somewhere far, and my mum didn't take me and just yelled at me instead

    Hey @PetiteQuark it sounds like you’ve not been feeling well lately and it’s understandable that you’d be feeling overwhelmed, especially when you’re concerned about what might be causing your symptoms. I see you’ve had some great reassurance so far but if you are still worried about it, getting advice from a medical professional is a great idea. You could reach out to NHS 111 by calling them or clicking on this link:https://111.nhs.uk/. They will be able to offer you support for your symptoms.

    Honestly i feel alot calmer now i just took my antidepressants today and idrk if its plaxebo or not but i just feel calmer and more logical now. I do feel kinda embarrassed though
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 623 Incredible Poster
    edited December 3
    PetiteQuark wrote: »
    Owen wrote: »
    PetiteQuark wrote: »
    Ech0 wrote: »
    @Nemuritai I am so sorry to hear that. It sounds like things feel really heavy right now. I’m here to listen if you would like to talk about it.

    Im rlly sick, almost 40deg fever, took paracetamol and it is 39.4c, i was gonna go to the doctor at 7pm to get it checked out and fot reassurance but as my normal gp was closed i had an appointment somewhere far, and my mum didn't take me and just yelled at me instead

    Hey @PetiteQuark it sounds like you’ve not been feeling well lately and it’s understandable that you’d be feeling overwhelmed, especially when you’re concerned about what might be causing your symptoms. I see you’ve had some great reassurance so far but if you are still worried about it, getting advice from a medical professional is a great idea. You could reach out to NHS 111 by calling them or clicking on this link:https://111.nhs.uk/. They will be able to offer you support for your symptoms.

    Honestly i feel alot calmer now i just took my antidepressants today and idrk if its plaxebo or not but i just feel calmer and more logical now. I do feel kinda embarrassed though

    @PetiteQuark there's no need to be embarrassed, it's totally okay. Honestly I often feel scared and anxious after seeing things like that on the internet, you're definitely not alone in that. I'm glad you feel calmer now :heart:
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 623 Incredible Poster
    edited December 3
    I'm finding it really hard to cope with everything right now. I'm safe, the thoughts are just overwhelming and I feel really numb and empty and can't stop crying. I'm sorry also if it's annoying at all, me venting I mean. I don't usually vent this much at all, things have just been a lot harder than usual.
    Post edited by Nemuritai on
  • KatieKatie Community Manager Posts: 1,959 Extreme Poster
    Hey @Nemuritai we're here if you feel comfy sharing a little more. You mentioned things have been a lot harder than usual recently - I wonder what things in particular you're referring to?

    It's also totally okay if you need a vent. That's exactly what these threads are here for, and our Community is here to listen and support you with whatever is going on for you right now.
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 623 Incredible Poster
    Hi @Katie, thanks for replying. It's hard to explain because even I don't know exactly why I feel so low right now, my mental health has just taken a bit of a dip recently I think. I haven't been diagnosed or anything but I suspect I've been struggling with depression these past few years, on account of the fact that I feel so exhausted and tearful and empty and lot of the time.
    Tw: suicidal thoughts
    I've struggled with suicidal thoughts on and off since I was younger but I must admit the thoughts about wanting to die have been stronger than usual recently, and it's been hard to deal with. I've been trying my best to tell both my parents but they've been kind of dismissive of it all which hurts. I am aware of what to do if the thoughts get worse and I have numbers I can call if I need to, although I've never really phoned anyone because of my social anxiety. Of course if it was an emergency I would though.
    It's just a lot to deal with by myself and it feels like the past couple weeks have been a cycle of falling apart and recovering again. I've just been trying my best to take care of myself and not be hard on myself for not being productive at all right now. I hope that made some sense, and I appreciate you checking in.
  • Jack25Jack25 Posts: 93 Budding Regular
    edited 1:03PM
    Same person at CMHT shouted at me and dismissed me again. He acted all nice when CRHT was in the room but when it’s just me he becomes dismissive and this time shouted at me to shut the conversation down that lasted only a couple of minutes.. I’m scared of them I don’t want to speak to any of their clinicians again. I always feel like he acts nice at the start then flips the switch when I start talking about my MH and quickly dismisses it. And with the other clinician telling me off for not making eye contact I’m really scared of CMHT. Should I just discharge myself they make me feel worse I feel really conflicted. I feel safer not interacting with them where I don’t feel punished for reaching out for help. They dismissed my GPS requests and rather than telling the GP they got me to tell them all the details I had to note down :< I shouldn’t be the one responsible for liaising information about my care. I have an appointment on Monday but I’m scared I would feel safer if I discharge myself
  • KatieKatie Community Manager Posts: 1,959 Extreme Poster
    @Nemuritai it's totally okay to not have all the answers and to not know why you're feeling like this. It sounds like you've been carrying a lot on your own for a long time which can be incredibly exhausting, especially on top of the suicidal thoughts you have since you was younger. How you're feeling and thoughts you're having isn't your fault, and you deserve to be taken seriously and supported. You're doing really well to reach out to our Community and to open up about this.

    I'm hearing that your parents have been quite dismissive when you've tried to open up to them, which I can imagine may feel painful or isolating. Would you say that's right? Even so, it does say a lot about your strength being able to reach out here and the fact you're aware of the numbers you would need to call if the thoughts got worse and you started feeling unsafe. Having numbers ready is a really positive and proactive thing.

    You mentioned that whilst you haven't been diagnosed, you suspect you have struggled with depression for a few years, and that maybe what you are experiencing and feeling does fall into the symptoms of depression. I wonder if you've spoken to any medical professionals about how you're feeling, if you feel comfortable sharing with us?

    It also sounds like over the last few weeks it's been feeling like you're stuck in a cycle of falling apart and then recovering again. Recovery and healing isn't linear, and can actually be quite unpredictable with lots of ups and downs. Going through this cycle doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong - in fact it shows that you're actually trying your best to look after yourself, even when it's hard and you're struggling. It's totally okay to allow yourself to not be productive right now if you're not in the headspace to be. It's so important you look after your own wellbeing and if you need to rest or do nothing, then do that.

    You don't have to have all the answers right now or to figure all of this out on your own. We're here to listen, and we'll be here if you feel comfortable sharing some more.
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 623 Incredible Poster
    @Katie I really appreciate you taking the time to listen and write that out, thank you so much. It's reassuring to hear that I'm not doing anything wrong or I guess losing the plot by being this way, and that it's okay to rest. I always struggle to rest and allow myself to not be productive, since I have it in my head that my worth is tied directly to how productive I am and how much I get done every day, even though I'm aware that's not the case. I'm really scared of being lazy, so taking the time to rest is kind of difficult, though I've been making more of an effort to and trying not to beat myself up over it or feel guilty.

    I haven't been able to speak to any professionals about how I'm feeling - it's hard to explain really but my parents are very distrustful of professionals and authority figures in general so I've never had the opportunity to, though I hope that in the future when I'm more independent I'll be able to, it's just not something that's possible right now.

    Thank you again for listening, it honestly helps a lot just reading that and knowing people care.
  • eylaheylah Community Connector Posts: 10,215 An Original Mixlorian
    hey <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 623 Incredible Poster
    Hey @eylah hru? :heart:
  • NemuritaiNemuritai Posts: 623 Incredible Poster
    I was able to talk to samaritans this evening via webchat which was scary but I'm proud that I managed to. Even if it can't fix things it was really good to get things off my chest and offload a bit.

    I just wanted to let everyone here know that I'm really proud of you all, you're all really brave for keeping going, even if it doesn’t feel that way :heart:
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